In this week’s episode of LOVELife, I discuss the dangers of dating someone who has just gotten out of a long-term relationship. Instead of struggling with the possibility of being a rebound, I give you a question to ask him that will give you peace of mind.
Hi Matthew,
To the girl who asked the question, you said “I am 24 and I am ready for serious long-term relationship”. Why limit yourself to numbers? Forget how old you are. You should get nervous only because you really like this guy and you think he is special, and not because you are 24 and ready for a long-term relationship. Please don’t set limiting rules to yourselves. Those rules don’t make things happen. Just enjoy your life the way you want to enjoy it. Go out with your friends, change your hair color, start new hobbies, go to the gym regularly. The more you invest in yourself the more you will love yourself and the less you will get stuck with rules imposed by the society. Those rules will be different 50 years later just like they were 50 years ago.
About the guys who know what they want, you are so on target, Matthew. They are the attractive ones as opposed to men who don’t know what they want. A guy with standards and take his sweet time to find “the one” with standards is attractive. Some women don’t want a guy that many girls can get- just like some men. (not making a moral judgement here. experimenting lightly is different than having a relationship with every other woman)
This is the best blog to stop by while sipping my coffee or wine. :)
Kiraz xxx
I started as Hi Matthew but I was talking to the girl who asked the question in my first paragraph. I need to proof read before I post my comment. Sigh.
On another note, I watched the part in NBC. You should have your own show, Matthew. I am not saying this because of your English accent that American women finds attractive or your looks, but because you are truly insightful. You don’t give some average answer to people’s questions like other relationship people. I can do that too. I can do even better actually. We need some real people on the media (people who smile because they want to not because they have to) in the USA, who will talk realistic. Tired of hearing and reading about stuff like “5 rules to happiness” or “6 ways to have a good sex life”. You have incisive analytical skills, intellectual inquisitiveness and profound intuition. As the 21st century philosopher Lady Gaga said “Baby you are born this way.” =) The society needs to take advantage of it. I don’t watch tv. much but I’d watch your show.
All the best xxx
smart..I think so..too.
I am a Korean who listens every single clip on youtube..
I found Matt being very genuine..and great in answerting well, very smart one..
Yes, want to see more..and learn more from him!
Hey Matt!
Thank you for your nuanced, mature, and insightful perspective on all matters love and life!
If a person’s response to why his last relationship ended is option 1 – ‘something personal to do with her / me & her had some serious issues’:
How much detail is it appropriate to expect / ask for regarding this?
What are the potential red flags to look out for in this response in terms of not being mentally, emotionally ready to move on?
Merci beaucoup!
This is Suk from South Korea, seoul..
Love to meet you in person, Matt..
But, unable to go London or other cities you do…lecture.
I am in trouble..and want to get out of it.
I am a good person with a good heart..and love to have another chance in my life.
Help me.
Suk
This is my numerous attempt to connect with you. I need your help more than, anyone… You are the healthy one to talk..I think, please help me.