Everything’s “Fine?” Here’s Why That’s Your Real Problem…

Maybe, like me, you hate the idea of “just getting by,” and just hoping somehow things will magically get better.

In this video, I’ll show you a 3-step plan to getting back on an upward path so that you can really have the life and love that you dream of.. 


►►  Life is too short to settle for “fine.” Be Extraordinary. Join me at the Matthew Hussey Retreat.

9 Texts No Man Can Resist

23 Responses to Everything’s “Fine?” Here’s Why That’s Your Real Problem…

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  1. Kristin says:

    M-

    I cried; I needed it though, so thank you.

    When there are people like you and your team in the world, it is a far better world than the bullshit that those other “motivational blah blahs”, who talk at me, who are pretending to give a shit, spewing nonsensical generic lines that we all literally get for free, in a delicious cookie, to compliment our general tsos, will ever create for me. YOU are why people connect to your words the way that I and others do. You guys create beautiful works of art with your blogs, and I am forever grateful. They hit home, and this one really hit me hard- to the core.

    Matt- If you all knew just how much you have served your “huskies” (I made that up I have no idea what people call themselves in regards to your following, sorry matty), thus far, I think you’d cry just as much as I did during those 7-ish minutes. Not to mention the re-watching after I was able to collect my composure.

    Thank you. I mean it, as always. I hope and need our paths cross one day because, let’s be real- everything ain’t fine and if it was, I sure wouldn’t want fine to be my end all be all. Fine sucks, dude.

    xoxo K

  2. Scott says:

    Hi Matt,

    Love your videos. They’re so encouraging and allow you to feel like your the only person out there feeling a certain way about a situation. Dating is tough and I feel like maybe it’s equally as tough for both straight/gay/bi/ trans etc. I’m wondering if you could give me some advice on a re accuring habit I seem to do. When ever I start talking to a guy, we follow each other on social media So we get an insight on each others lives I guess you could say and to also see that they are who they say they are… then We end up catching up and it’s a sexual catch up and we hang out for a little bit and have a catch up. I seem to always fall for a guy so quickly after that first sexual encounter and end up thinking too far into it and getting jealous when I see them with other guys that I know of from the gay scene in my town. I then start to doubt myself and think I’m not good enough and maybe my life is boring, maybe I should start going to the gym so that we share something in common or maybe I’m not fit enough or my job isn’t that good. I beat myself up constantly because I’m always comparing myself to others. Do you have any advice that could help me avoid this constant re accurance? I lack confidence, I would love to be able to just join a gym and make healthy choices to make me feel better about myself but it’s something that scares the crap out of me because I fear I will be judged.

  3. Alanna says:

    Thank you for your videos, Matt. They’re like a call to arms to live a fuller life.
    As for “I’m fine”…
    I asked a customer how she was doing once. She gave me the biggest smile and cheerfully replied, “I am failing at absolutely everything, today. You?”
    I wasn’t really sure how to respond to that. I must have looked confused so she elaborated, “I’ve had a lot of setbacks today, but it’s let me appreciate how smoothly things normally go. Plus, the odds are pretty good that tomorrow is going to be awesome in comparison.”
    I told her I thought she had a great outlook on life. She advised me that your goal should be for every day to be better than the last.
    The kitchen staff then messed up her order, her friend spilled water on her, and there was a problem with the register that delayed them about ten minutes. The whole time, that lady remained upbeat about it.
    Now, whenever someone asks me how I’m doing, rather than saying “I’m fine”, I tell them, “Better than yesterday; not as good as tomorrow.”

  4. Elaine Lemmon says:

    Totally guilty of wearing this disguise. Here’s the thing… a lot of people get uncomfortable when you take off the mask and get real about your life; even when you’re expressing excitement about improving upon the shitty stuff you struggle with. Seems they would rather you say, “Oh me? I’m super. How are you?” This could be called the “teething period” I’m sure, but it gets damn hard to keep being real when people close to you react badly to honesty about the state of your progress. Great advice. Stupidly hard.

  5. Melleissa says:

    Thankyou for all your motivating talks..u rock !!!..your retreats sound pretty cool..but i live in australia..hope you can get out here one day..thankyou xx

  6. Vimbai says:

    wow! totally magnificent. So much to learn thanks Matt…I love your attitude and I’m gonna adapt to it you know 10% better. You’ve really helped me.

  7. Vimbai says:

    WOW! Totally magnificent, so much to learn. Thanks Matt, I love your attitude…really helped me.

  8. Lisa Turney says:

    Awesome video. The only thing I find frustrating about doing the extra 10% is when others don’t reciprocate and do this as well. I find myself feeling resentful. Would be interested to know your thoughts on this.

  9. Alessandra Burenin says:

    This is lovely. It made me realize that I really do have a fulfilling life. I tend to always think I’m never doing enough and wonder why I’m exhausted at the end of the work week (7 days for me!) And on reflection it’s because I do exactly that – 10% more here 20% more there… thank you!

  10. Laurie says:

    Thank you so much, Matt, for this reminder. “I’m fine” does not equal happy; it equals settling. We shouldn’t aim for average, but continually strive and grow and take action towards our individual best. Very timely for me at the moment!

  11. C says:

    Agree with the previous 2 posters (first 2)

  12. Charity says:

    Matt

    All your messages have been encouraging, Please how do I answer the question how are u when am not fine.because it seems the normal answer is am fine.

  13. Lani says:

    Hi Matt and team,

    The content was great, it was an affirmation that I am on the right track with my own journey…and then the $6000 was dropped. I watched the vlog twice,to see if the feeling blows over.

    Why not just say Matt is going on a leadership course?[Rhetorical question]
    It is pet peeve, for me dropping the value of something is bragging when your whole audience can’t do the same and it takes away from the message. I am also thinking that you are now in part sending a message that a lot of money has to be dished out for people to growth or better.

    I am sure it was not the intention, I have been following Get the Guy vlogs for 3 years.

    Hope you have a wonderful week. Looking forward to next week’s vlog already. :)

  14. denise says:

    I totally agree with you!

  15. Judy says:

    I totally agree that we all have the ability to give that extra 10% to whatever that may be – relationships, work, etc. However, we have to want to do that, and often that is the caveat. So what motivates a person to want to give that 10%??
    I am a huge fan and have been for several years. You have a broadened perspective to the idea of relationships that I find interesting. You do not focus simply on boy meets girl, but rather what makes that boy or girl an interesting and wonderful person all on their own. That is the difference between you and other coaches.

  16. Louis says:

    I totally agree with Matthew on that! Please read this as this might help you see things differently. The only big problem in staying in the fine line for too long is that we cannot know how really fine it is unless we try a new perspective. I agree that it can be restful at times. Though, i think that Matthew is saying that it should not be a general way of living. Waiting for a dip will change that perspective but at the cost of a negative experience at least when it happens. Being pro active boost confidence and moral and therefore boost your resistance to these negative events!

    By trying to know ourselves a bit better and push ourselves a bit, it will not only lessen the next negative experience but will help us enjoy even more the next positive experience.

    I think that if i say to myself that staying in the fine line is ok, it really means that I choose to be average in general, that means that i choose to be an average dad, to be average at feeling good, being average at helping others and be average and getting back up after a negative event. For me, for my kid or the people i love, I really cannot be that person, so i try to live all that there is to live good or bad, because when you are prepared, things are rarely absolutely bad. Only after the sudden death of a loved one and after going through continued events of disease in my family, i started to realize that i had to make my life better. I started to integrate a good balance in my life and it became great very fast. I can now do my best at anything but also am able to relax like a champ! :)

    It looks like it is exhausting at first, but when i really started to do it and i stopped letting myself fall back into my old habits of “averageness”. I figured out that it is actually a more restful way and that it gives more energy. I have done more meaningful actions in a few months than i have done in a decade. If i can do it, you can do it too. Don’t wait for the next bad event to make things better. It will immediately change your life in a good way that you cannot yet imagine. There is really too much at stake to let things go on their average path, for you and your loved ones!

    Enjoy your life and be passionate about it!

  17. Jillybean says:

    Love the video! A little booster shot in the arm, this morning! : )
    I describe the fine line as a vanilla life. I personally want nuts, chocolate, bananas, strawberries, anchovies, whipped topping and whatever else will add to my life and enrichen and embolden it. This is not to say, as A. mentioned, that some people aren’t perfectly happy with vanilla.
    I am sharing a very tragic end to a love relationship with one of my best friends. Some of my words to her have been how great our capacity is to love and love and love again. That dip is below the lowest point for her, right now. But, she is such a strong person that I do not doubt she will love intensely, again. Love feeds everyone in its path – a friend, a coworker, a mother, a spouse. If we squander it, we will be at the fine line and not know what truly remarkable experiences await us.
    Thank you , Matthew , for another excellent bit!

  18. Tamara says:

    Great advice. Something to think about. I will say however that I agree with “A” in that living a fine line for a period of time is exactly what a lot of us need and want and quick frankly are capable of when crawling back out of a traumatic relationship. Nevertheless, your video inspired me to consider whether I can push myself to be more and live a fuller life

  19. Jun Liu says:

    When is your next retreat event ? I would like to go. Please let me know . Thank you. Warm regards. Jun Liu

  20. Fiona says:

    Brilliant concept.

    Another very wealthy man once said to me that there are only two ways to movitvate people. He illustrated it with the idea of fleas in a test tube.

    First the fleas can all jump out of the test tube. A lid is then put on and the fleas keep jumping to get out but now they are hitting their heads on the lid. After a while they will jump just short of the lid to stop being hit.

    The lid can then be taken off and none of the fleas can jump out. This to me is your fine line life: they are alive and they don’t get hurt and they say they are OK but they are stuck in the test tube even though they can jump out.

    So how do you get them to jump out?

    There are two ways: either put a bunsen burner underneath so they HAVE to jump out or, put in a flea who CAN jump out, and the others will WANT to follow.

    I have the Home Retreat programme, still haven’t got past module 2 because my life has already taken off massively: an winning Hollywood cinematographer has said my first film was magical, has agreed to oversee the whole project of my new film, has offered me access to any number of talented industry people who can assist me, and has lent me a film camera to begin filming today.

    Thank you for being my lead flea Matthew Hussey, when I follow you I can fly again.

  21. Nenette says:

    I love ur vids, all I listen to all day. But I still allow certain guy in. I spoil him rotten, got him job at our firm with much more money stunning personality changing car and life to what he had, even when he failed I arranged different division National IT Manager position for him. Spoiled him with jewelry, gifts, clothes, but he cheated on me, used me, I forgiven him but know he still does, lies and plays on my emotions, he does nothing for me yet I keep giving chances. 3.5 years already. I treat him away for
    Weekends and discovered how he treats and other girls away, never me. Everything tells me to run but he keeps pulling me back, saying no one cares about him. I always pay for everything, am blocked on his social networks, he doesn’t like my kids. He ignores me at work, ouch, Im very loving, sweet, forgiven him too many times. Just sent Julian a msg to leave me alone. Cant trust him, I pray this time your msg stuck in me as I dont want to be ok, I deserve to be extatic about life. Tnx for just.. Everything Matt. Ur amazing.xx

  22. A. says:

    Some people find joy and contentment in living a calm even-keeled life. If it works for them and they are happy, maybe not as intensely happy as others, but happy, I think the straight line is fine.

    Sometimes one’s life was previously so chaotic or in a dip for so many years that a straight line *is* intense happiness. Maybe not forever, but for a while until the person recovers.

    Don’t underestimate the straight line. :-) It can be calm, peaceful, restorative. Not everyone feels happiness pushing, pushing all the time.

    I will say giving more even 10% can be exhausting sometimes. I still do it anyway, but I have to admit I’m sleeping a lot on the weekends to recover and stay happy.

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