Top 6 Traits to Look For in a High-Value Man

Women often ask me, “Matt, you give all this great advice for women to be high-value, but how do I tell if HE’S an incredible man worthy of a relationship with ME?”

Ok, I’ll bite.

80% of a happy relationship is choosing the right person in the first place, so this issue couldn’t be more important for women who want to find lasting love.

In this week’s video, I join forces with my brother Stephen Hussey (co-author of Get The Guy) to talk about the 6 SURE SIGNS you’re dating a high value guy, so that you can spot when he’s truly someone worth investing in.


►► Confused about what to text him? Just copy & paste these 9 FREE texts → http://www.9Texts.com

9 Texts No Man Can Resist

240 Responses to Top 6 Traits to Look For in a High-Value Man

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  1. Afterglow says:

    A high value man walk his talk,he is not afraid to get the relationship to the commitment stage as soon as he start showing gestures that show love and respect towards lady he is with,Because he doesn’t do anything that just give pleasure to him for a moment.But make a responsive and honest move towards the lady he actually loves.And, ignite love in her heart with an intention and determination to nourish her and this relationship forever.

  2. Nathalie says:

    Paying for something: initially,especially when he’s asked you on a date, him offering to pay for the bill is a top quality for me but I don’t expect him to always pay. Offering to pay,in its own right, is important. MY contribution to that is counter-offering when it’s technically my turn and then he must politely allow me to do so if I offer.

  3. Pingback:Prime 6 Traits to Look For in a Significant-Worth Man – Dating Tips Central

  4. Beanie says:

    What if he thinks I’m the one who always threaten to leave the relationship?

  5. Malin Lundberg says:

    A high-value man tells you when he meets up with a female friend or when he runs into an ex. Later when someone tells you about seeing him with his ex or another woman, you already know about it and don’t need to feel insecure or be put on the spot.

  6. Joy says:

    Matt. You have a very handsome brother.

  7. Joy says:

    A trait that I might add, hmm. You two were spot on so, this is a bit of a challenge. Id add a important trait is not to shuve his beliefs or hers towards his as my celebrations during the year are to only be done the way my family has for hundreds of years blah blah blah.
    There has to be compromise.
    I feel even though whoever my other half may be not only would he want to see me grow as a individual and grow also together. That kinda passion an acceptance is what true relationships are a rarity one can want an wish for.
    Making her feel beautiful

  8. Rosie says:

    Another important value is that he respects your point of view even when he disagrees

  9. Amy says:

    good grief you boys are like those ladies who leave their boobs hanging out. Cover your CHEST!

  10. Aimee Deem says:

    I think a man willing to give and receive pure honesty with perception, not defensiveness. Really, this goes both ways. I’d rather be hurt a bit with the truth than comforted with a lie or half truth. I find that men (and women) struggle with this kind of honesty.

  11. Serena Lynn says:

    I would say that he would want to get to know your family as well. One that makes time aside to spend time with you and your family. Of course, it would be the same for a woman as well. She too needs to learn to find time and get to know his family as well with a genuine interest, not because both are obliged to.

  12. Love says:

    A man who has the capacity to meet you half way. A lot has been said in media over the past few years on women and ’emotional labour’. I think a high quality man is one that has the capacity to meet you at least half way emotionally. If you argue or there are disagreements, he doesn’t leave you with the job of trying to bridge that gap. He can admit when he fa*#cked up and he can understand and forgive that you f*@ck up too. He can say sorry and he knows how to gracefully accept one as well. He can forgive himself and you for not being perfect, and doesn’t become derailed when bumps along the road are hit (as in your last point, he knows how to separate the chafe from the seed and not everything is hinged on breaking up or not).

  13. Melanie Porter` says:

    Chivalrous.
    Opens doors, respectful to his mom and other women, a gentleman.
    That shows class and high-value to me:)

  14. Kristin B says:

    There is a guy at work I’ve been texting/flirting with. we seem to have really good chemistry and he’s very nice BUT my best friend at work, a gay guy with no reason to make it up, said he thought he overheard him say he shares the opposite political views as mine and if you’ve been following the 2016 US presidential election you will know why this can be such a scary thing to disagree on. Does anybody have any thoughts on this? And please lets focus on the question and not what views are right and wrong. thank you in advance

  15. Nancy McCormack says:

    A key one also:
    Is a guy that does and not just says he,s going to do
    In other words actions speak louder than words

    Thank you loved the video guys

  16. Lisa Hodges says:

    Excellent job! Especially the last one…….NO TWILIGHT….become emotional “vampires” an they will never get full
    Reminds me of a book by James Hollis, a Jungian, called ‘The Eden Project’. The premise is that we are all, at some level, wanting to “go home” as he calls is “through the other he calls ‘the beloved'”. Unreasonable expectations placed on our most intimate relationships lead to frustration. Essentially we can never feel the comfort of all our needs being met like we did in the womb, “home”. He concludes the best we can expect is to have a partner on the journey, and the willingness to let them be them, even the parts you don’t like.

    • Love says:

      I loved the ‘Eden Project’! What I think is confusing though is tempering that fantasy and knowing what you can realistically expect from a relationship. If you read other books on couples (such as Harville Hendrix ‘Getting the Love You Want’) there is this idea of using the couple relationship and dynamic to heal old wounds and patterns, some experienced in childhood. And it’s interesting that Hollis book outlines this as a fantasy. Other books I’ve read fall in either camp and it leads me to believe that there is a lot out there in our culture that feeds our fantasy expectation of ‘the one’, in ways that could be destructive.

      I love this video though, great points Matt and Stephen!

  17. Maria Kadieva says:

    I know this sounds a bit too obvious, but a man who genuinely cares about you and shows it not only to other women, but to you too- that’s the sexiest trait a male can have. A man who really appreciates you as a person, not just lustfully, but is genuinely interested in your life and endevours. Someone who remembers the small details and doesn’t forget when you tell him something. Someone who never makes you doubt whether his intentions are genuine. Someone who never makes you question if he wants you and only you- that’s the number one male quality I desire.

  18. Deborah says:

    Honesty, empathy, and compassion for me are the hallmarks of not only a high value man but a high value woman. Behaviors that are unconditional and reflected toward everyone not just their significant other.
    Someone who knows themselves and who they are. If not all the time at least expressed when they are aware. There is strength in vulnerability! Expression of vulnerability may produce fear but what is fear? An acronym for False Evidence Appearing Real.
    A quirky sense of humor and laughter is just as important me.

  19. Sara says:

    He appreciates your strengths, cherishes your realness, and provides you a safe and loving space to just be. Allowing you an opportunity to stop being “on”, to stop being the bread winner, to stop being the strong one at the office, to stop being the only one who will help you. He provides you with a break. A moment to be tired. To rest. To be a girl.

    When you’re not perfect or 100%, he feels honored that you’d share all of yourself w/him even if it means you’re going to cry while doing so.

    He continuously, without judgement or tiring, validates your feelings and connects on a soul to soul level.

    He’s intentional and clear about his wants/needs as well as yours. When a man declares that he wants to take you off the market to be exclusive or date to specifically determine if you’re a good partner match…that’s a keeper.

    He’s the 6’6″, ridiculously handsome, has an excellent “I’ve been a jock most of my life body,” intelligent, and deeply caring man that unconditionally accepts the 5’8″ woman, who strips down to share her entire self with only him, even though she weighs 30-lbs more than he does. And in that moment when she may be in a delicate state, he sincerely connects with her to share how much he values all of her, just as she is. How beautiful she is and how he’s drawn to authentic self.

    I value a man who’s able to save energy for his kids to be sure they have what they need to prosper.

    A man who’s able to relay the depth of his feelings as well as his strength in the way he looks at you, smiles at you. How he interlaces your fingers with his when you hold hands. The way he explores your body because he/you/the both of you just enjoy it…there’s no other goal in mind.

  20. Jihe says:

    A high value man:

    1) Is transparent and direct about how he feels or thinks about you.

    2) Has his own life and also respects you have one as well.

    3) Can expect change, accept routine, and be comfortable with opposition in the relationship.

    4) Never stops trying to fight for your love and impress you during the relationship (sorry guys, once we breakup and you try to do this after the fact it is simply pointless)

    5) His words match his actions

    6) His world isn’t all about what he needs, thinks, or feels…He actually checks in with yours and tries to lighten or brighten your day if he can.

    7) He isn’t afraid to negotiate, disagree, or fight with you in a healthy and constructive way.

    8) His criticism is constructive, loving, and supportive. He wouldn’t ask of you what he doesn’t ask of himself.

    9) He is on your team. (This means he defends you instead of trying to make himself look better around others. He thinks you are the best think since sliced bread and doesn’t complain to others about you. He is there when you need him and can also be a silent partner…Etc)

    10) Healthy doesn’t try to isolate you, control you, or cage you. He understands sometimes you may need your own happy place away from him sometimes to decompressee and recharge.

  21. Jessica says:

    Everything in your video sounds like my man. One thing I think is good is when he can share a deep dark secret and also if your man sees and is attracted to another woman and is willing to point it out but no make you feel like she is better than you!!

  22. Darcy says:

    Once you express that you like something he tries to continue that same behavior because he values your happiness as well as his own.

  23. Gracie says:

    A high value man takes care of little things that are important to you such as checking tires on your car or changing light bulbs at your home.., it’s the little things that as women don’t come natural to us.

  24. Faith says:

    My high value man should be able to laugh at himself. That he knows it’s ok if things don’t go according plan. he follow through with what he says he’s going to do. Respect. Respect for self and others.

  25. lynelle says:

    I can’t add to this — just want to tell you, Matt, and also Steven, I just Love your presence on-camera haaa. I do, and I feel very comfortable watching and listening to your content. You rock, no doubt — Great Job.

    lynelle

  26. Kay says:

    He would never use foul, hurtful or derogatory language no matter how angry he is, even in the middle of a fight. he is respectful because that’s his nature. Even if the content of what he is saying is hurtful facts, he still uses his words carefully as to not be hurtful on purpose like by calling his partner names, etc.

  27. Meredith Poffenberger says:

    I know that I am dating a high quality guy when he is a gentleman. Opens doors for me. Walks on the street side of the sidewalk. Pulls my chair out for me. Puts my coat on for me and pulls my hair out from under it. Etc. Old school ways are very charming and shows class.

  28. ange says:

    A high value man listens to the woman he loves simply because he values what she has to say, good, bad or indifferent.

  29. Monica says:

    Someone who knows how to say I’m sorry (and GENUINELY means it-emphasis on genuine:D)! A lot of people have difficulty saying this and most often than not, they evade and try to apologise in some other way. Nothing beats “I’m sorry”. And when a man can say these two words, that’s what I call a real MAN. It does take a whole lot of courage for many to say I’m sorry.

  30. Sue says:

    He has to show respect when speaking to you and others.

  31. Katherine says:

    For me,a guy who is a true gentleman. Not a man who puts on airs but has a caring heart behind his gentlemanly ways. Sincerity in his actions relaying his true intentions.

  32. Susie Derkins says:

    Someone who’s a good judge of character.

    Especially if you’re in a long-term relationship with him, this will alter the quality of your life.

  33. Lisa says:

    Hello,

    I really like the video about how to recognize a high value man that is worth investing in.

    One trait I hope to find in a high value man is that if I ask him to watch Turner Classic Movies with me, he’ll do it without whining and complaining. He do it because he just wants to spend time with me.

  34. Kim Willis says:

    A man who doesn’t let his pride get in the way. I know I tend to do this, and it snowballs into other destructive habits that end the relationship.

  35. Hayley says:

    He listens to you. Pure and simple. If he can’t take his eyes away from the Tv, phone, game, or sodding Rubix Cube then he’s not worth the time.

  36. Cindy says:

    Great list! I would add…

    This goes along with the idea of not putting the relationship on the line when you bring up a problem or hurt feelings… I would go a step further and say he’s strong enough to not be punitive in ANY way. He doesn’t use it as an opportunity to pull out his sack of grievances and blast you back or insult you with it. Or, even if he needs space to calm down and think about his response, the energy of that isn’t passive aggressive – silent treatment, distance, feigning indifference, stonewalling, etc…

    He knows how to resolve a conflict or disagreement with dignity and respect toward you and himself. Heroes do this !!

  37. Cristina says:

    A guy that takes the time to argue with you about things that matter to to you or both of the people in the relationship. It makes you feel that both care about what the other person has to say, and shows that they are both interested and are actually listening. Also it shows that even if they don´t agree still can have a mature discussion making or keeping things interesting.

  38. Luz says:

    He does not use deamining language towards others much less for you.

  39. Mel says:

    He shows an interest in the things that are important to you (vice versa)!

  40. Yvonne Muriithi says:

    A high value man for me, stands out when he makes time to be with you, regardless of your schedules your a priority. Think this through… If any man today was told that some lady owes her billions of money, he wouldn’t stop at anything before getting that money. To me ones a man sees your worth, he will beat traffic, go through walls, meet your parents if he has to, just to be with you.

    PS:I picked money because that’s I think among the most valuable assets we can all relate to.

  41. Rosetta says:

    Hi, Matthew, how are you? I would like to say that I like a man who can tell me the truth about his feelings, when he’s upset, scared, happy, just honest with his true self. I need to see him that way.

  42. Mary says:

    He leads with a kind & generous spirit in his interactions with others and his outlook on life

    He has a productive, not destructive, conflict-management style

    This is uber-sexy: he loves himself enough to practice self-care, in whatever forms make sense for his life, in order to continually improve (or at least not jeopardize) his physical, emotional and psychological health.

    He has dreams, goals and plans for himself, and is courageous enough to take steps toward making those things happen.

  43. Angelina says:

    One that can also receive criticism or when you tell him something you don’t like or upsets you without getting all defensive.
    So someone who’s confident enough to really listen to his partner, and then discuss it in an emotionally mature and open way.

    And must add that the last one from Matthew is REALLY REALLY good and important; knowing that a guy won’t threaten the relationship whenever something doesn’t suit him. Been there (narcissistic ex) and it sux!! Undermines self-confidence like you wouldn’t believe, so big thumbs up for mentioning that one!

  44. naomi mccarthy says:

    He doesnt have to broadcast his assets brag about his achievements constantly
    Naomi

    Nomieemac@gmail.com

  45. Christy Allen says:

    I think a man who is not afraid of introspection and communication is very sexy as well as making him a high value man. Respect and trust are important too, because in the process of all this great introspection and communication, if I share something particulary sensitive about myself with my man, I do not want it to be brought up in an argument and used as a weapon against me! Additionally if he can also laugh at himself and not feel threatened when he makes mistakes, that’s great too!
    The list goes on and on!

  46. London Kit says:

    Dating in my 40’s has laid me open to men who are being controlled by ex wives and young children – both are a huge turn off.

  47. Laetitia says:

    Has good manners.

    This is something easy to spot from the beginning – and if you can’t spot it, run for the hills!
    Etiquette is the expression of basic consideration and respect for our fellow human beings as well as ourselves. It can also be an indicator of so many further things, both when followed and when defied. It can show how well integrated one is in society, what one criticizes about it, and how intelligently. Personally, I don’t care much for traditionally chivalrous politeness, since in my experience it translates to expectations of traditional gender roles in other areas, too. So I will be alerted by a man who always insists on paying for dinner or helps me put on my coat. On the other hand, I have found that a prompt “thank you” for a present might not always tell me how grateful a man truly is, but a failure to thank me in a timely manner WILL tell me how much he takes things for granted. Not hedging, not cancelling plans without a really serious reason, being on time, apologizing if he is not… might not always tell me how compelling it truly is for him to see me, but will speak volumes as to how much regard he has for time other than his own, and as to how seriously he takes his own word.
    I could go on, but instead I’ll just add: his manners aren’t good if they’re only good towards his woman.

  48. celiaegraham@gmail.com says:

    Your brother is trying to steal your limelight! You’re the hot one we want to hear from – he needs to advise from the sidelines! No offence mate but it is just distracting having you there, I want to think about me and my relationship with my guy, and Matt is the one I have learnt to trust over the years I have subscribed. I just switch off when you two are gabbering away together and it’s like too much information. Fair enough if it was a hot woman with Matt, but his soppy brother? Give me a break xx

  49. Xenia says:

    He has values that he doesn’t betray no matter how difficult it is to stay true to them.

  50. Donna says:

    I’m going to share this one… probably the most useful video and information so far. Not all of us are desperate to get a guy…. but we’d like a little assistance in making better better choices.
    To add to the list, things that I find sexy in a man are Integrity, good humour, and I mean that I find him funny, not a man who tells you that he’s funny, natural charisma, an ability to listen not just hear, kindness to all others, humility and I love a free thinker…. a man who doesn’t believe all that he reads. He questions and comes up with his own ideas about life and everything…..

  51. Holly says:

    I can’t believe Jameson bothered to bleep out the F word but didn’t take the time to bleep out the T word. I mean seriously, which is more offensive?

    My definition of a high value man is someone who has never heard of the concept of sparkling vampires.

    For you Twihards who are reading this – I am making the assumption that if you are following Matthew Hussey you are intelligent enough to recognize friendly ribbing when you see it. I’m a bit fanatical myself when it comes to certain fandoms, (yes, I realize that comment is redundant). I am definitely living in a glass house. But I’m afraid I can’t help myself. Feel free to lob those rocks right back at me.

  52. Stef says:

    Integrity. His word means something, and he can be trusted to make difficult choices.

    Humility. He’s the opposite of narcissistic, but at the same time confident.

    Has boundaries. He doesn’t allow others to abuse his time or his kindness, and he kindly but clearly enforces his boundaries as necessary.

  53. Chrissy says:

    When having a conversation he’s making eye contact and gives his full attention. Not texting or making phone calls.

  54. Anastasia says:

    High quality trait; a man that is concerned with your well-being first. Such as,”are you comfortable, did you have enough to eat, what would you prefer to do?

  55. Sally says:

    Agree with all you have said, and would also add… He can read situations and respond accordingly – not just to me, but to the other people around him. To me this is about caring. If a man has enough sense, tact, and ability to look beyond his own self to behave in accordance with the situation is valuable. For example, if he was to walk into a room with my friends, who are sitting and joking, he would participate in a relaxed manner with open friendliness, can afford to be a little cheeky. However if he walks into a work event with me, he knows he’s there to be polite and helpful to me to assist me in my networking aims making his behaviour an extension of my professionalism.

    • celiaegraham@gmail.com says:

      Good one! I have had a guy humiliate me in front of meeting my family for the first time, coming into my work at inappropriate times and also being possessive and childish when meeting my friends for the first time. Ended the relationship for this reason. My guy now knows how to behave and how not to, and makes the effort in every situation. I feel like we are both reading the situation together, and it I feel supported and proud to be out with him. We show each other off and that is so important.

  56. Jag says:

    A few things I’ve liked in a high quality man.

    1) he tends to speak positively about other people and doesn’t gossip about them.

    2) he can laugh at himself.

    3) he takes responsibility rather than placing blame. Especially when talking about past relationships…I listen for how he speaks about his ex and the role he himself played in creating that relationship. If he doesn’t take any responsibility and blames the ex for everything going wrong…that’s an alarm Bell.

    4) this is my favourite and so sexy…he has integrity! He is a man of his word. If he says he will do something, he follows through.

    • Lisa Young says:

      Great Points Jag!! Absolutely Integrity Is So Incredibly Sexy, And I Am SOO On The Same Page About Guys Who Know How To Respectfully Praise Vs. Gossip Too. Thank You For Highlighting That, That Is So Important.

      And I LOVE What You Said About Taking Responsibility Vs. Placing Blame Too!! That’s Such A Good Point And Can Say A Lot About His Character And Maturity Level, Amen

    • lynelle says:

      These are great. I completely agree — hear, hear — thanks!

    • SUNSHINE says:

      Spot on!
      :)

  57. Hayley says:

    A high value man to me
    Is someone who is thoughtful, who thinks about your needs before his own. Who values being upfront about the big issues and values in life. Someone who can have those tough conversations with you without freaking out or getting distant.

    • Lisa Young says:

      Absolutely Hayley. Being Able To Have Tough Important Conversations Without Freaking Out Or Getting Distant Is Essential, Nothing Is Hotter Than A Guy With Smooth And Courageous Communication Skills.

      Great Points, Thanks For Bringing Them Up

    • Lisa Young says:

      Absolutely Hayley. Being Able To Have Tough Important Conversations Without Freaking Out Or Getting Distant Is Essential, Nothing Is Hotter Than A Guy With Smooth And Courageous Communication Skills.

    • SUNSHINE says:

      Yes…the tough convos point is a great one!

  58. Andree says:

    Some of these may seem dated as some younger men may not know these as important traits…
    A high value man:
    1. has manners — says ‘thank you’, opens doors as someone else mentioned, walks on the curb side when we are walking together down the street

    2. cares about what makes me happy and sad; listens when I share (not over-share as Matt has explained)

    3. is willing to have difficult conversations; will share of himself without being asked

    • Lisa Young says:

      “Cares About What Makes Me Happy Or Sad”

      Amen, That Is So Important

      Thank You For Bringing That Up

      • lynelle says:

        Yep — agreed. Soooo important. You ladies have thought about so many things that I never had to think about before…that I do tend to notice now, as “things have changed” for me. Thank you all!!

    • SUNSHINE says:

      Cares about what mks me happy/sad,willing to hv tough conversations

  59. Tiffany says:

    He knows how to say sorry and admit his faults without getting angry or defensive. He also has the patience to explain his point of view instead of getting angry or upset when the girl asks him something or misunderstands something. He follows his word and tries his best to keep them. If he can’t, then he makes up for it somehow.

  60. Nadia Shafiei says:

    Just recently I found out that I may have a condition that requires surgery and this surgery although could save my life may cause inability to have children. Nothing was for sure but I knew we talked about having kids and that combine with the news of possibly not being able to carry a child, was unbearable.
    When he got home I explained the entire thing calmly and I said I’m not sure what to do … His reply was: “your health is number one priority and if we can’t have kids then we don’t. I love you so much and we will make it work.”
    The fog lifted and weight of my shoulder and now i can decide what to do without worrying and thinking I might lose someone I love. And he prove to me that I am more important than the idea of having kids.
    Putting each other’s health and security first no matter what fantasies we might be losing … Not sure exactly how to put it in one sentence but I’m sure you ll find a better way to describe this man.
    Love your outlook on relationships.

  61. Rhonda says:

    Addition to the list: a man who can express himself during conflict without being hurtful, insulting or destructive.

  62. Dione says:

    A High-Value Man not only helps you grow into a better versión of yourself, he Also grows with you, But sometimes each person in the couple needs to grow by themselves, so I believe that a High-Value Man lets you do that, and Also asks you to di the same for him, not always a couple can grow together, there are areas that every body needs to work by their own.

    • Lisa Young says:

      YES Dione, Being Able TO Grow Together As Well As Independently, And Bringing Out The Best In Each Other Is So Important.

      Amen

  63. Sarah says:

    He insists om picking up the tab, certainly for the first handful of dates. It shows that he values your company.

  64. Joey says:

    Reliability. Can pick up a phone, call when he says he will and keeps/confirms plans if something comes up or reschedules. Not someone who’s flaky.

  65. Yemima Belmont says:

    Matt & Steve – Since you guys like boxing so much, I bet you’d like Bryce Courtney’s books The Power of One and Tandia.

  66. kat says:

    great video! may sound trivial, but my partner opens the door and lets me walk in first when we go out somewhere together. that makes me feel special and shows he has good manners. I also feel it has wider implications about being protected and valued for my company. I offer to do the same when the opportunity allows as I don’t like to be one-sided about things.

  67. Professional Woman says:

    Ambition… to provide and protect… and his actions must match his words

  68. Sarah says:

    He treats the people around him with respect. It’s so sexy when a man is just as kind to the waiter/waitress, janitor, cab driver, check-out person, etc as he is to me and his friends. When I see that a man treats every person with equal kindness and respect, I think he’s a man worth holding onto.

  69. Martina says:

    Definitely true, I would say that those are the qualities that a High Value PERSON should have – a woman as well!
    I also believe that a man should be a gentleman, but not a sterile gentleman: he should be polite and avoid arguing and confrontation (example: with people in a bar) but if someone crosses the line, he should not be afraid to throw a punch and defend his date-DATE I say because ( and here is the second high value trait) a gentleman should have manners no matter whether he is in a company with his girlfriend, wife, just a casual fling… and not change his manners after a while when he “secured” the status of the relationship or got what he wanted. He should BE like that, not ACT like that to just win you over

    • Lisa Young says:

      YES Martina, SO Well Said!! “He Needs To BE Like That, Not ACT Like That To Win You Over”

      So Freakin True. After Guys Have Secured You You Can Tell A Lot Of Their “Chivalrous Manners” Was Just A Fake Ass Unnatural Front Trying To Impress You

      A True High Value Man Has That Rhythm Naturally Blended In His Way

    • SUNSHINE says:

      Good points!

  70. Zoe L. Hill says:

    A man who can see you as a friend. To me, this appreciation for your subtler qualities is a sign of wisdom. It means he doesn’t see you just as a garnish to his masculinity. It means he is an evolved thinker. He sees you for YOU. He is secure. He sees how the world appreciates you as well. Mutual respect, intruigue and passion for life become the impetus of the relationship.

    • Lisa Young says:

      I Love That Zoe. How you Elaborated On The “Someone Who Can Appreciate Subtler Qualities About You As A Friend Too, Not Just A Garnish To His Masculinity. Someone Who Sees How The World Appreciates You Too.”

      WOW

      So Deep And Wonderfully Said, Thank You

    • SUNSHINE says:

      Awesome points here!

  71. Janice M. Wilcox says:

    I just love you guys, integrity is very important to me, I finally found a very nice a genuine Military man and we make a good match together. Thank you for all your hard work and great information you provide to help us understand each other.

    • Lisa Young says:

      That’s Awesome Janice, I’m So Happy For You!! It’s So Cool That You Can Both Enjoy These Videos As A Couple, I Love That About You Guys. It’s An Awesome Way To Understand Each Other Better And Appreciate Those Subtle Gem Qualities, You Are So Right

  72. Tobey says:

    I would like to add another trait of a high quality man: he takes responsibility for his part in a conflict or disagreement (as does she). I was in a relationship where when we had an argument, he would let me take full responsibility, then leave to take a walk and come back and pretend like nothing happened. So another trait is that he can engage and work out conflict together with his partner.

  73. Vasiliki says:

    He notices my quirks (the way I bite my lip when I am thinking or tap my fingers when I am frustrated). They’re suddenly endearing traits.

    • Lisa Young says:

      Yes That Is Cut Vasiliki! I Love That Too!! It Makes You Feel Warm And Enthusiastically Adored, A Very Wonderful And Precious Feeling

  74. Lee Woods says:

    A high value man will not leave you sitting alone at a table while he goes out and dances with other women. He should at least make sure you have a dancing partner while he is out dancing. ( Especially if he knows you love to dance.)
    A high value man will not be a “Handsy Guy” with other women if you have told him it bothers you when he does so.

  75. Marla says:

    a sense of humour and the ability to make you laugh when you are feeling sad.

  76. Jodie Walliker says:

    A big one for me is a man who, not only isn’t affraid or threatened by my strengths, he also embraces, supports and helps nurture my weaknesses. All so I grow and head towards becoming the best version of me that I can be for myself, him and our relationship.

    • Lisa Young says:

      Very Beautifully Said Jodie, I Agree. We Definitely Don’t Need Anyone Who Feels Threatened By Our Strengths (It’s Hot When Guys Are Secure Enough To Adore Them), And Someone Who Accepts Our Weaknesses And Helps Nurture Them Is SO Awesome Too.

  77. Melanie edmondson says:

    He makes time for you even though he has a busy life. He doesn’t try to change who you are because who you are was what attracted him in the first place

  78. JGH says:

    Even if he treats you like a goddess…
    Observe how he treats others, like a busy waitress who got his order wrong or a person who accidently knocks into him.

    Also a very good giveaway is how he speaks about others from his family to a work colleague to a stranger on the street – with the notion that “what you say about others says so much about you'”
    I’m a psychotherapist and this is a real insight into personal projections (issues).

    Love your work, thanks guys x

    • Lisa Young says:

      Great Point, You Are So Right In That How He Treats You Won’t Mean Much When He’s Such A Dirtbag To Other People.

      Amen, Thanks For Highlighting The “How He Speaks About Other Family Members” Patterns Too, I Think that’s An Awesome Red Flag To Step Back And Stop Investing In Such Poisonous Destructive Trash Too

  79. Anastasia Kefalas says:

    The ability to see that you’re worth being with because you’re a quality woman and not walk away because you don’t have a support system ( which means you’re a strong woman because you’re facing things alone), or because you don’t have a lot of money, but to recognize you bring to the table things money can’t buy like, loyalty, support, honesty, etc. That they’re not looking for the perfect woman, if you have eight or nine of the 10 things they’re looking for , missing that last thing means you’re not right for them. They’re looking for something that doesn’t exist. I do believe there’s perfect for me, but no one is perfect. They should love your faults and quirks as much as the best things about you.

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