How To Make Yourself Immune To Negative People

Come and join Jameson and me on a drive around Hollywood where I share a story of my recent visit to the most depressing place in America, and a little secret game my mum once shared with my when I was young…

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59 Replies to “How To Make Yourself Immune To Negative People”

  • Your mum sounds absolutely adorable! I love that she makes it into a game ask her what she does when she’s having a bad day and then comes across a negative person that’s the worst. I went to the DMV right after I moved here and they were really nice and welcoming. I seem to always find someone to talk to also try that next time it makes the time go by much faster especially if they are some crazy that’s lost their marbles yes those are the best.

  • Matthew Hussey, you are a gem! Your mom’s game is awesome – I think I’m going to make up a game to play with my preschoolers based on how to do this – play the happy game! Obviously the benefit is that when we make others smile or laugh and don’t feed into their negativity, not only do we help lift them up a bit, but we are uplifted as well. Just think what the world would be like if everyone did this even once a day… I’ve also found that giving people treats is a very nice way to cheer them up ;) Looking forward to your next video – I love them all!! Many blessings to you.

  • Yay, Matt and Jameson! Road trip!! I thought it would be something like out of The Hangover. Like, “Dude, you got a tattoo last night!” :-) I love when you even mention Jameson.

    The DMV is miserable, but everyone looks their best there. Weird, but true. Glad you found one nice person there.

    You have a lot of your mom in you. I had a weird day. Spent all day baking and am exhausted now. And the cakes didn’t come out well and are inedible. But you made me smile. :-) Thanks for that.

  • Thanks Matt for the excellent game advise …I am going to use that strategy and test it on the next negative situation that I might encounter..

    Negative people tends not to find anything amusing and that could be a challenge…

  • Saw you in Seattle recently—great event! Definitely recommend going! Thanks for the video–very true about the DMV I’ve been to many in 3 different states and it’s the same everywhere :(

    I’m usually in a decent, if not happy mood, but seeing your video I have to admit that recently I was the grumpy one. After going to 2 banks to try to open a new business account and not being able to because I didn’t have all the info that they required with me, I was in a bad mood because it felt like such an unproductive day and it was near the end of Friday. I wanted to get it done because otherwise I’d have to wait till the next Friday. When the 2nd banker told me I needed another piece of info that I didn’t have on me, I was surprised by my reaction because my lip started to quiver like I was going to cry. I think it was just the culmination of 2 days of feeling like I was “spinning my wheels.” I went to my car and found the info on my phone. I actually was too embarrassed to go back in so I drove to another branch.

    After waiting in a chair for awhile as the time got closer to closing time, I was regretting not going back into the previous bank. Then a very friendly, smiling banker came over and said “Can I give you some attention?” I thought that was a great line :) After just a couple of minutes of talking to him I was cheered up by his energy, even though it turned out that he couldn’t help me. He kept me company while I waited to talk to the business account person. We talked about my new business and his dessert shop that he was planning on opening, which was really interesting and exciting! It turned out that I didn’t even get to talk to the other person after waiting a half hour because they were going to close soon. He actually offered to buy me a drink sometime. Even though I’m not interested in a date and didn’t accomplish what I set out to do that day, I was very happy I met this man because talking to him really brought my energy back up and I was excited about working on my business venture again :)

  • I love this and I actually do this at work. I sometimes need to do a project with the coldest of people and I play this game where I see what it will take for me to “melt” them.

  • One of my best friends works at the dmv. She is a needle in the haystack of lovely people there. I praise her all the time. She is the person you refer to in this video.
    Quodos to your mum.
    Glad to see you are taking care of Jameson, he’s my “boy”

    Leecis

  • Its nice to think Matt actually reads his YouTube comments. Or at least gets some of the themes of them reported back to him! I wish I had a mate like him that I could just text and ask for advice on all these frustrating game playing g guys! Or a pocket Matt that would be good.

    1. I’ve always joked to myself that Matthew Hussey needs to be cloned and then micros-sized so that we have him around at all times for his wisdom, insight and humor on any given situation. An added bonus; we can gaze at his handsome face and listen to that gorgeous British accent full of wisdom.

  • No, Matt, you don’t treat Jameson bad at all. I think you guys have a great time together. And I would like to thank you for the amazing wisdom you have shared with us. And the person that you are. I really look up to you. I want to become like you when I am older. Such a leader that you are, your energy and insights are life-changing. I hardly say this to anyone.

  • I think your mom has a lovely attitude. If she does that genuinely on a regular basis, it’s more of an attitide than it is a game. She must have a healthy source of her own – very adorable.

    You giving Q&A is enjoyable. Jameson must be happy around you, don’t hear him sigh that often ;)

    Happy Sunday!

  • The DMV I used to go was exactly as you explained. It was the sanctuary of Miserality. (Miserableness) Something happened and now they would bend over backwards to assist you; as if I were a 5 star buying customer at an expensive store. I love you Mom’s advice. By getting them to smile or laugh, you might uplift them and definitely yourself.

  • Loved your video!
    I would like to purchase tickets for Toronto…trying to get a couple of girls to go with me…where is it held in Toronto?
    Would like that detail so I can spread the word,
    Thank you,
    Kim
    PS I love the way you play with Jameson…it feels fun to me :)

  • Thank you for sharing your (and your mother’s) wisdom. This is a lovly tip and I will try to do that and also encourage others to do the same. We need more smiles and happiness + less frowns and grumpy attitudes.

    Have a great Sunday in Cali.

    Cheers
    Claudia

    PS: How about coming to other countries to give more people the chance to see you live? :)

  • I never respond to email or YouTube postings and I’m new to reading your books, email advices and web videos. Even though I feel your responding to women’s comments about Jameson somewhat amusing, I don’t feel you should apologize for woman critiquing your work. I some how feels it lowers your worth and you talk so much about worth to woman. Just wanted to put that out there.

  • Matt,

    When I got the link for this video in my inbox, I thought the subject of discussing how to manage negative people you meet in your life is a great topic to talk about. It is a subject that not enough people discuss and they really need to. I am so thankful that you are talking about it and giving advice on how to handle it. I have friends in my life that I feel that their default emotion is sad/negative/depressed. They always look for reasons to be sad instead of happy. They do not understand that happiness is a choice. It is choice that you make in every situation. I like the idea of making it a game to make these kind of people happy. Can you give specific, concrete examples of how to that? I have tried to make my sad friend happy and nothing has worked.

    I’ll give you a real life scenario that I dealt with with my “never happy” friend. I live in New York City and when Super Storm Sandy hit my friend called to ask if she could stay at my apartment because she lived in one of the mandatory evacuation zones. I of course said she could stay as long as she needed. She ended up having to stay for three weeks. The entire time she was in my apartment she was in a very sad depressed state because she could not stay in her own apartment. I tried to engage her in conversation and tried to make her happy but there’s nothing I could do turn her mood around. She was in fact rude and dismissive to me whenever I tried to talk to her when I came home from work. What games could I’ve done to make her happy and not so negative? I felt she had the choice to be happy because she had a warm apartment to stay in with electricity and running water but she refused to see that. She just cried all the time because she didn’t have her own apartment. She had a choice to be happy but she chose to be sad. It was hard for me to watch and witness her constant sadness because I volunteered to clean out the houses of people that lost everything and they were not as sad as she was. She lost nothing. She was just temporary displacement from her apartment for a few weeks. Her apartment was perfectly intact and she lost nothing. She just didn’t have electricity and running water for a few weeks. She was acting like she lost everything she ever owned when that was not the case. She just couldn’t keep things in perspective and focus on what she did have. She even started to blame me that she was not happy which was really upsetting because there was nothing I could do to make her happy. I tried everything to make her happy! I gave her a free place to live for as long as she needed. In the end, I felt she does not take responsibility for her own life and her own happiness in all aspects of her life and expects others to do it for her and she gets angry when they can’t make her happy. That is game she plays. It is a game I no longer play with her as I cannot be apart of it. She does not see that no one can make her happy except herself.

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