Will Your Guy Grow Up To Be Like His Dad?

They say that in order to find out who a woman will become in the future, look at her mother.  But is that true? If it is, then it must be true of men and their fathers too, right?  It’s a weird moment when you first spend time with your new boyfriend’s parents. You size them up, and after a while you probably start to observe moments of resemblance between your guy and his Dad.

Often this is harmless.

But what if his Dad has certain behaviours or beliefs that make you uneasy? Should you now be scared that it’s only a matter of time until your guy turns into a version of his father?

In this week’s episode of LOVELife, I speak to a caller who has this exact fear, which I answer by telling a story that reveals why we should always be careful separate the parents from the child, and why we should refrain from predicting people’s behaviour based on other members of their family. I also reveal how you use one simple question to find out how likely your guy is to grow into his father.

 

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2 Replies to “Will Your Guy Grow Up To Be Like His Dad?”

  • Hi, Matt! how are you? :) I should preface that I don’t normally comment on anything online but I’ve had the pleasure of discovering your awesome wisdom for the last week! I couldn’t resist :)
    I mean what a gift you are to our world! I wish you could somehow get inside of me and see yourself through my eyes, through everyone’s eyes who watches your brilliant videos. Your heart absolutely shines through :)

    I initially came across your “How to Handle Stress Like a Spartan” segment and you had such an amazing message to share there. I like anything that feeds & enriches my mind, anything that can help me grow. So when I meet people who offer new and unprecedented perspectives, it just makes me so happy! haha! Granted, I didn’t actually meet you… but nevertheless I know about your work & what you’re offering to the world – which is something so beautiful :)

    I really do wonder what you’ve seen in your life. What touches your heart? Because i get this sense that you’re a gentle warrior, a man of philosophy, of much greater depth & breadth than most and that is so incredibly captivating.

    In a lot of ways, you remind me of my dad. Have you seen the film, “The Last Samurai”? There’s a character there named Katsumoto, played by Ken Watanabe and he was in interaction a lot with Tom Cruise’s character. But his integrity, his honor, the wisdom he shares very much resonates to the man my dad was. That movie always reminds me of him :)
    I remember one afternoon, when my sisters and I with my dad were watching a Pistons-Spurs championship game, and out of the blue dad asked us, “Do you know who here is the real opponent?” My sisters and I, a little confused at what he was talking about, just kind of looked at each other. Of course, little miss thirteen-year-old me blurted out, “Pistons! Duh.” confidently (we were all rooting for the Spurs) and my sisters just echoed me. Dad went, “Nope. Guess again.” We tried to give him different answers until we finally gave up. Dad said:

    The real opponent in any game, is time. No matter how good the players are, no matter how much they score, no matter how clever their game plan is, the one that they’re really trying to beat is time.

    Ok, dad. He can be a show off sometimes :P That’s how he was, whenever we were doing something, however little it was, he would always make it a lesson for his little girls. Most times that we watch movies, for example, at the end of it, he would always ask us what the moral lesson was that we took from that story. It was just amazing. An amazing way to grow up. I wish i could get to hug him one last time, it’s the only place I’ve ever felt safe. And I feel that when you get a chance to be a father someday, you’ll be just as amazing as he was! mostly because of the heart you have.

    You know you surprise me with the way you pay such close attention to what matters to other people. You’re incredibly sensitive and respectful. I mean, your focus. They say a man who gave such scrupulous attention to detail, such loving care, in one area of his life, likely tended to bring the same concentration and focus to others. I can only imagine how you are with the people in your life you care about :)

    Well, the point of this writing, is really just to say a great deal of Thank You. You were a huge help to me last week with the adjustments that needed to be made at my work, which i was in charge of. The changes were necessary, but everyone was resisting. There was just more pushback than i anticipated, and when it comes to my work I’m incredibly proud & I needed something to bring my focus back and strategize. Thanks a lot :) since then though, I’ve made it a point to watch one of your videos every morning along with my news & breakfast! LOL! I’m a pediatric nurse so naturally, I’m up at 4 AM getting my day started & your wisdom is such a beautiful way to start the day!

    I can’t decide if I should say sorry for taking your time w/ this “comment” because I probably just took a few minutes of it, haha! but I think it’s also important that you know we’re incredibly grateful for you! I always take the time to write something every day whether it’s in my moleskine, wherever. Tonight I’m staying in w/ red wine & just decided to write to someone else, so thank you for allowing me to do that. You’re beautiful, Matthew. All of you is beautiful :)

    Thank you for your words and have a good day tomorrow! I know you have an event & I also know you’ll do great :) best wishes to you!

    P.S. I saw your video about being immune to negative energy & saw that you weren’t buckled in. Seatbelt on, handsome! there’s only one of you Matt, and we need you here on the planet ok? (you can always go ahead & leave your front door unlocked or your windows open if you’re still feeling a bit risky w/ your life. Well, maybe that’s a bad idea too. Unwise anyway).

    (another) P.S. Stop looking at the camera with your eyes looking like you’re the big bad wolf and we’re red riding hood :P

    1. wow lol I appreciate the time it took to write this, but it seems a little bit desparate of you… You already know we love you matt!

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