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One Quick Tip That Will Save All Your Relationships

In this week’s video, I’ve got a quick life tip for you that may seem small but it actually has the power to save your career, your friendships and all your relationships…

Together, we’re going to fix this bad habit that you and I both do every day. Try it out, and then shoot me an email and let me know how it works out for you. (You’ll see why this is an ironic request when you watch the video…)

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47 Replies to “One Quick Tip That Will Save All Your Relationships”

  • Ugh! I’ve tried to watch the vid like ten times and it keeps saying ”this video is private”! Watching your vids is one of my Saturday night rituals. Can you please get your team to fix it? Thanks Matthew! Love your work and can’t wait to learn (and practice) this new tip!! :)

    1. Ha ha, maybe it’s part of the “ironic” thing. We’re supposed to fix all our relationships by keeping everything private. Or by sharing everything openly? One or the other. ;)

      1. Haha! I think you’re right! He got me there! Maybe I should read the description of the vid next time before I watch so I don’t get fooled lmao! ;)

  • Hi

    I’m having same problem, it keeps saying sign up to watch. I’ve signed up to everything including all the programs man myth etc, so not sure what else to sign up to!

    :-(

  • Hello Matthew,

    I’m so much like you.
    I take too much time to respond to emails because of I want to give the person a thoughtful answer.

    But I also have another issue if I answer too fast.
    I tend to make blunders in my communication.
    Or, I write answers that are too much complicated.
    I need to time to organize my thoughts in a way that is easily understandable by other people.
    I’m not naturally synthetic, I have to put a lot of effort to build a synthetic answer.

    I had some troubles in the past when I answered too quickly to emails because of the this difficulties.
    I received a cold answer saying that they didn’t understand at all what I waq trying to say.
    Or, they answer something that shows they misinterpretated what I was trying to express.

    That’s why my daily challenge when I writing emails is to find the right balance between :
    – hesitating too long (which can be problematic in a profesionnal context)
    – answering too fast and making blunders or not being synthetic and articulate enough.

    That’s hard!

    Soso

  • Thanks for this post Matt! I Love all of your videos. What if you don’t want to get back to that person because they want to see you and hangout with you but you dont want to hangout with them? And you’ve told them you dont really want to hangout and you’re busy doing your thing but theyre just not getting it? I feel guilt tripped and obligated, almost resentful into explaining myself when i’ve already explained to them what i wanted to say. Then what?

  • This video is made for me… I do this ALL THE TIME and hate myself for doing it. I have to fix this.

  • Hey Matthew,
    It just sounds like you are just being a considerate person and you do care about your fans and other people in your life. We all know you are a busy person and know it may take a little time for you to get back to us. Also wanted to say that I have read your book GTG which I really like and even a counselor that I talk to is helping me understand between the Blackfeet tribe culture of dating and the rest of the U.S. For example, for some reason it’s odd that the girl is not supposed to ask the guy out for coffee cause he’ll take it the wrong way, even a few of my guy relatives think that’s weird. But if the guy is a total jerk then we women we still have the right to accept the male’s coffee invite.

    Got a little off topic there but just mostly wanted to say that I like the advice that you give.
    Laura

    P.S.- Have a little question if you don’t mind me asking, have women in the past ever used any of the tips that you give on you yourself? If they did did you find it odd? Just a little curious. Laterz

  • Hello Matt,

    I really like this video, I’ll tell you why. In my life, I have experienced many, many people who do not reply to messages, texts etc. that I have sent to them. To be quite frank, not replying to a message, is downright rude and ignorant. In this modern day and age there is no excuse for ignoring someone. If the person receiving the message doesn’t want to be associated with the sender, tell them !!! It’s the kindest thing to do.

    I made a pact with myself about 3 years ago that anyone and everyone who sends me an e-mail, text, a missed phone call etc, WILL get a reply, and now, I always, always answer or acknowledge everyone who contacts me. Also, on Facebook, if I see it’s one of my friends birthday, I always say “Happy Birthday x” to all of them.

    And Matt, I love your work :)

    Angela x

  • Hey Matt. ..

    That was an eye opener for me ;) 11 on 10…good topic matt..actually I do find this very depressing and we assume they totally might not like us…and when they get time ..They respond very kindly and in a caring way with the reasons that are to be a sort of a made up excuse- that makes it hard to punish them ;)
    but what if they show this pattern often? Esp when it’s someone you really love and who loves u too. ..He calls himself a workaholic ..but can that reason be genuine? I need ur advise. .how can i make this time lag shorter without being desperate in his eyes ? Waiting for a vedio on this;)

  • This video reminds me of an essay my grandfather ( may allah bless his soul) used to tell me” don’t leave today’s work for tomorrow. It may seem that it is superficial words but it holds a very essential and deep meaning. In spite that we all always fall for the same trap

  • Hello Matt,
    The messages i was thinking about,but didn’t send or write are endless, also because of the option to be misunderstood. Thank you for sharing your thoughts on this topic :-)

    1. Simple tips are sometimes the best! I wrote many messages and answered old emails in a short way with no consideration how awkward this might be. and people are responding without resentment :-)

  • Thank you, thank you, THANK YOU! Finally one topic I personally (mostly) don’t have a problem with – but am very passionate about, especially in a professional context. I think it’s so great that you want to work on that for yourself and have put it out there for others to consider as well! I always find it sooo frustrating when I don’t even get a “Thank you for your e-mail. I’ll get back to you in a bit/tomorrow/as soon as I can/etc.” message back, just to indicate “received, read and thinking about it”. It takes no time at all but for me it’s actually a respect thing. Even though a more in-depth answer right away would be ideal, this kind of quick answer just lets me know that my message hasn’t disappeared into a “black hole of oblivion” … and this is calming and prevents me from getting overly anxious for an answer.
    In a dating context, that’s exactly where the guesswork starts if you, say, are waiting too long for a response from your crush/boyfriend. I don’t know if it’s the same with guys but us ladys (at least that’s true for me) then get all of those thoughts racing through our heads that drive us craaaazy, like: maybe he’s just super busy and hasn’t even properly read my message yet; does he even care; is he annoyed by my message; is this supposed to be some sort of game; does he simply have different texting/e-mailing habits/standards and this has actually nothing to do with me personally; etc. etc.
    Even with friends and even if I know that they like me and don’t mean to offend me, I still feel it’s rude to take your sweet time answering a text or an e-mail.
    Of course, there are some variations as to how long it’s okay to put off an answer. Depends on the context (work, private) and what type of message it is. (Just a little “disclaimer” to my comment. I didn’t mean to come off as super judgemental or impatient. ;) I just needed to get that off my chest.)

    Love
    Anita

  • Lol! So does this mean you will respond to all our emails? =)

    I’m kidding.

    I’m guilty of this on RSVP (dating site)…I often get very lengthy emails from men and feel like I need to reply in kind and it gets tedious. I will now try and respond quickly with a couple of sentences. :)

  • Excellent video Matt, thanks. I’m glad I’m not the only one who has done this – putting off an email response in order to take time to show the person appreciation or my consideration of what they have said, but then finding it difficult to find the time. A quick, heartfelt response can be much better and will probably cover 80% of what you want to say anyway. Have a great week.

  • Totally agree – a quick email in acknowledgement. In it you can say you will send a longer one in hours/days/or even next week (providing you keep your word!).

  • Hello, Matt.
    That happens to me too, not only with emails but for some long articles I find on Internet, so I would get a lot of articles saved in pocket. I’ll try to practice what you’re saying. And because I get it, I understand why you haven’t written me back yet ;-) Greetings from Peru!

  • Ha! This is spot on. I am terrible with this–or rather, expert at exactly the process you describe. Especially with letters; I just sent my cousin a package with a letter I started last fall! I wanted to send her a dvd of photos but the work of making the dvd and then writing a good letter to accompany it kept playing against each other and then the longer it took me, the more I had to say and the more awesome the package had to be to make up for the time it had taken….vicious centrifugal cycle! Eventually on Friday I stopped trying to make it awesome and just got it in the mail as it was, so she will get SOMETHING rather than the total silence that comes of Correspondence-Guilt Syndrome. Sighhh.

    Knowing that this is a problem for me, I’ve been working on changing my habit by noticing when I say “that’s quick; I’ll do it later”–every time I hear myself thinking this, I have to DO IT RIGHT NOW.

    It sometimes works. ;)

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