Hey people, I wanted to share this story with you about a dear friend of mine. What a way to start the year!
If you have time, please leave a comment below with your ideas of what you want to achieve this year. Writing something down and stating it makes it all the more real.
86 Replies to “A Genuine Dream Come True Love Story”
I’ve been seeing this guy for almost nine month now, the problem is that he has never told me he loves me even though I feel it when I’m around him, he always jumps when I talk about relationships. I’m confused whether we are in a relationship or not coz he has introduced me to his family and friends. Does this guy love me or is he playing games with me ? Please help me
Hi there Deliwe,
You have to at some point be up front about the situation, never just assume you are exclusive, as many guys will use this as an excuse to do whatever they want on the side. Say to him that you aren’t with anyone else, and don’t plan to be whilst you are still seeing him, and ask him what he thinks about that. You’ll soon find out whether he’s really willing to commit on that level at this stage.
All the best!
I attended quite a few of your courses a few years ago and although I resisted a lot of what you said at the time it seems to have sunk in.
I made myself just talk to people randomly (I hated this bit – SOOO hard) – whoever they were – people in the check out queue, families on the tube, people at the post office – one of these randoms who I chatted to a propos nothing at all, was a new bloke rejoining my music group. 18 months later he is now living with me.
There were a few challenges when we got together as he had come out of a long relationship and had a young family, he wasnt keen on anything serious. for the first time in my life I focussed on what I wanted for myself and told him that “friends with benefits” would just get in the way of me finding someone who would commit to me. I wasnt maipulating him, as far as I knew, that would be the end to our flirtation, but it wasnt. He hated watching me being open to meeting other guys and eventually stepped up. Im very happy.
Thanks for your persistence. I let go of holding on to second best and just relaxed and had a nice time meeting great new people. My bloke chose me and wasnt chased by me. I focussed on what I really want and didnt let my old mantra of “something is better than nothing” sidetrack me.
Thanks for all of your help. Keep up the good work.
Serena, that’s sooo great!!!
Congratulations! I’m so happy for you. I’m so happy you have really been following those principles of being the high value woman that you are. So proud of you. Please keep me in the loop on all the amazing things that are coming your way, it makes me so happy to read them.
Your fan, Matthew ; )
My goal this year to meet my soul mate- the man of my dreams with whom I will be married to and have children with
You are a inspiring man Matt, have an amassing year!!!!
Thankyou Daphne, you too! x
Great goal Bucci! X
i agree with serena’s post. i’ve found a similar state of mind for myself. since i started talking to everyone and feeling fine by myself, life has become so much more enjoyable. finally even old friends of mine who lost contact with me find much more time to spend with me. we go out and have fun. and even though i had a few crushes on unavailable guys, i am glad that i managed to put myself first and get over the fact that they simply won’t step up (which used to make me feel terribly down in the past). right now i keep flirting, and even though nothing serious is in sight i am (for the first time in my life!) finally content with being single and enjoying my freedom! :))
all the best to all of you for 2012, keep loving yourselves!
Love it Vikki, congrats on all of your progress, it’s so great to hear about it. PLease keep me updated! Matthew x
Hey Fantastic message to start the New Year. Congratulations and good luck to you Siobhan. Is it a baby girl or boy? All the best.
Moving forwards I have been visualising my ideals for life through meditation on a daily basis, this aids me to keep in mind my desires (which often fall by the wayside due to demands of life) and manifest them for 2012. This is my year and it will be fantastic.
I’ll speak for Siobhan in telling you it’s a boy : ).
I’m sure it will be your year KT. All the best, Matthew x
New Year’s Eve was my first date after 3 yr separation and nasty divorce. The night was such a disaster and I just have to laugh! I think he was more nervous than I was – a 46 year old batchelor (military) and just didn’t know what to do with this dynamic lady on his arm! Honestly, if I had been wearing army uniform he would’ve been fine! For 2012 I’m being true to myself first, and am going to have alot of fun along the way!!
Great stuff Betty! Love the energy, Matt x
Im good friends with the gorgeous Robinson sisters and love them dearly. i’ve spoken with Siobhan numerous times about what you do and have been to one of your seminars and seen your DVD’s.
I think your FAB and a huge bright star of the future.
Massive love to Siobhan and baby Ethan and all the best for you in the future, ill be following your journey and see you at a seminar soon no doubt!
Thankyou Kate, that’s really lovely of you. Happy new year to you! x
I have been in an intimate relationship with a guy for nearly 10 years and he is my best friend. I really feel he is my soulmate and I love him to pieces…only thing is we have never been a couple…..he has his girlfriends and cheats on them with me and I don’t want anyone but him. He always calls me if he has a problem (he broke his ankle one night and called me for help, rather than his girlfriend!) and when we are together it’s amazing, we lay there relaxing and watching tv and it feels natural and we fit together perfectly, there’s no uncomfortable positions to lay or sit or cuddle, he always strokes my hair and asks if I’m ok and kisses and cuddles me and he says really sweet things to me.
He won’t tell me how he feels about me though and I’ve asked him several times.he knows how I feel and he gets jealous if other guys flirt with me or if I hang out with his mate he gets funny with me and wants to come with. People say he’s just using me but it doesn’t feel that way when I’m with him it feels genuine…..it’s hard to spend time with him though as he has a gf but wen I do see him my stomach sinks and I feel sick and nervous and my heart races.
I don’t understand what I’m doing wrong as he won’t commit to me…..I’ve tried being distant and tried being there alot, I’ve played it cool, I’ve tried getting him to open up and he won’t……I don’t know wat to do…..I know he is the one for me but I can’t get him to see that he is and that he should give me a chance.
Everyone keeps saying I should get rid of him but I can’t and It feels wrong to even think about it…….I’m so lost and don’t know what to do or to try…..
….I know I sound like a horrible person who is obsessed but I’m not I promise, I need advise……
Spontaneously, I just want to say that I had a similar relationship. At the end he finally told me that he is enjoying his power to hurt other people’s feelings. I would have never thought that he is like this, I loved him so deeply and I felt deeply loved by him. Now, I told him to go out of my life and I’ve got rid of all the e-mails and stuff connected to him. It feels so amazing finally to look forward for a fresh, wonderful and committed relationship with a man I will love and who will give me the love I deserve. We all deserve the Best!
Absolutely, we ALL deserve the best! We just have to act like it : ) x
time to move on girlfriend. You’ve made it too easy for him. I’m not being harsh, I have just gone through the same thing. Can’t tell you what a blast it is to meet new guys who don’t treat women like they’re yesterday’s trash.
Love the confidence Julie x
Emzi, you need to get rid of that guy whom you have been seeing for 10 years. Ok,it will be hard because it sounds like you are in love with him. However, that guy is just pushing the boundaries on how far he can go without making a commitment. There are other guys out there whom you will get on as well with, fall in love with and will also show you the love and respect that every woman needs. Go girl!
Ultimately you have to decide what you want. If it is a committed relationship with someone truly special then you have to realise that this situation is not making you happy, and that no amount of staying in it will ever make you truly happy. If you’re willing to settle for something that feels comfortable in the short term then by all means stay where you are. The problem is as time goes on this situation is likely to become less and less satisfactory for you, and could well end up wishing you had spent that time searching for someone who is willing to give 100% to you and only you.
It’s always easy for people on the outside to say that you should get rid of him, and I understand that when your heart is in something it’s not that easy in practice. But I would encourage you to think about what is really going to make you happy in the long term, not just what feels comfortable today.
Congratulations on having the courage to be so open and honest about the situation. I hope to support you more as the year goes on.
When I started reading your post, I thought maybe I had written it and forgotten! It sounds so similar to an experience in my life. We’ve been best friends for 10 years also! he was ‘the one’ we spent all our time together, we just fit, best friends, he made everything in my life light up even when we weren’t together…blah blah .. and all that other soppy stuff ;)
But Matthew’s right (I’m starting to think he always is ;) ..it does get less and less satisfactory, well it did for me, I’m pretty sure that it is inevitable given the realities of the situation.
Anyway I hope you don’t mind if I share my experience, it’s a bit long ! Mid last year I began to take more notice of my feelings, how did the actual situation with him really make me feel: nauseous, angry, upset, unattractive! I slowly started to connect with how unhappy it was making me. And after 10 years it’s not like I hadn’t tried a ton of things change it!
I’m quite stubborn and I know I wouldn’t change just because someone else really wanted me too so why should he change for me? No matter how lovely I am ;) I realised that IS what I’m asking him to do if after so long he has not made that decision for himself. Without realising it I guess I was trying to control him / that situation, this just made me desperately unhappy! When I actually stopped to take notice, spending time thinking / dreaming about it him was actually making me unhappy overall!
It very slowly started to occur to me that I wanted more than these feelings for myself. Why not, being happy feels better!!
I started to replace calling him with not calling him! Going to his with going to meet other people! Thinking about him and how to change our relationship with doing things I haven’t done for ages like drawing again! Even if I didn’t want to do the other things at first, I just kept remembering my own advice of ‘it has to change sometime, I’m not happy’.
I think knowing and expecting it to be hard and feel unpleasant helps! It was really difficult. This was my best friend, work partner, confidant, and pretty much everything to me in my life. I also felt that he needed me too and guilty if I wasn’t there for him, so getting distance was the hardest thing. But being with him, though still desirable is a delusion that I recognise now and so can choose differently. Night times are the worst but I just allowed myself to feel sad. Its a short term discomfort but like someone told me once “you know at some point you have to move on!”
The alternative was staying in a situation that no matter how I tried to spin to myself was attacking my confidence in myself and was making me angry, passive aggressive, jealous and stagnant! Yeuk!
I really believe that the subconscious will believe anything you tell it, and by putting yourself in a situation that makes you feel devalued you’re constantly reiterating to your subconscious that that’s how you deserve to be feel and that it’s ok! It’s a complete misconception! It’s not true!!!! But with all that reinforcement it becomes a really strong belief you’re creating over time and it’s hard to climb out of that so I tell myself: Just do it! (put myself in more positive situations) before it gets stronger.
So it was not just the best option, It was the only option in the long run. I had to let go sometime. It had to happen sometime! There’s far too many other things I want to achieve this year now to waste more time upset.
Anyway the thing is now I know it was worth it, I still miss him at the moment but I’m on the upcurve. I feel so much more alive, productive and excited about life. I can actually begin to imagine I could be attracted to other people! I didn’t think it was possible I really didn’t but it is. I’m actually starting to think of me first for a change and it feels good because you know what I can actually control that! (I don’t know if he was ‘the one’ or not but in any case there’s no option to think about that in the here and now I can only get on with focusing on my own life)
Thank you soo much for sharing I hope you find your happiness. Lots of love, Indi
Ps Watching tons of Matthew’s videos on YouTube really helped me turn it around too ….thanks Matt :) xx
(The ones about core confidence, being high value. Oh and this sounds corny but loving yourself.. I started to think how would things be different if I loved myself as much as I love him!!)
Great story! This year, I chose to just BELIEVE. Believe that I will find my dream job, believe that I will find my dream guy and build a future with. I believe when we make up our minds about something, the universe conspires to make it happen. And it will!:)
With that level of belief I’m sure it will happen for you Vanni!
I fell in love for the first time last year…He showed me the beauty of life and everything was so much more enchanting with him by my side…And then 3 months later, he totally withdrew himself….broke up with me over an sms..The next days were miserable and I had a tough time facing every new day. I still do…
Though I am unaware of what went wrong, my new year resolution is to get my life back on track, make the best of the opportunities given to me, and anticipate that a great person will definitely come in my life, who will help me get over my hurt and pain.
I think I may find this journey a bit tough…but no one has the right to mess up my life and my heart..
P.S: Hope u have a great year ahead Matt! You are doing awesome work by trying to mend all the broken hearts…
“but no one has the right to mess up my life and my heart..” AND none has that POWER either if we don’t let them!
I wish you all the love and happiness you deserve in 2012.
I usually sense interest in me from a guy but because I’m shy he moves on without even talking to me or pursuing me and it’s making me feel so insecure and hopeless. I want to change this habit and meet someone lovely this year. HELP.
You are right to use the word habit, shyness is just that. This year make a new habit of being confidence. Start with the small stuff and work your way up. You’ll find over time this has a truly compounding effect on your life.
Thanks for commenting!
I met a man online last December we had a few dates and the connection was amazing for both of us. Then he disconnected and called or facebooked me and would ask what I was doing the following week-end. If I was free he would never commit to getting to gether, but if I was busy he would really want to see me. Now he is calling again and he made tentative plans for tonight but once again hasn’t followed through. I feel he is not living up to my standards, but don’t know how to tell him. Also after losing contact with me for months he’ll call me once and then not call again for 10 to 11 days. The cycle will then continue. I want what I can’t have and I’m really not sure what he wants.
You have to communicate what you’re not happy about. It can be done seriously or with a hint of playfulness (my personal favourite) but either way it should be done firmly and with certainty. When this happens he’ll respect your time far more and will also be more attracted. Double win!
You’re already high value, you just have to realise it!
thank you for these beautiful and inspiring story. I am so happy for Siobhan,she must be an amazing, loving and kind person. What a great mum, I can see.
I wish that every person on this planet could hear about high value, creating, impact, confidence…. WHAT A WONDEREFUL WORLD:)))))
See you on next Women’s weekend in January 2012,
You’re right, she’s an amazing person, and a very dear friend. Now let’s working on getting you everything you want this year! Can’t wait to see you on the programme this month!
o.k. i’m ready lets do this i’m excited i’m ready to do this o.k. thank you.
Great stuff Sharrollene! i’m with you all the way! Matthew x
Matt, -this is not about my love life- what if we are not sure of what we want? All I want from 2012 is to find my calling and make money from it, but have no idea how to do it.
Come see me and we’ll work it out together lol! It’s all about working out your criteria for what makes you happy, then finding a lifestyle that meets your criteria. I.e. I love people, i love variety, and I love human psychology, so I find something that allows me to indulge in all of these things. Sometimes you have to get it wrong a few times to find it, but don’t be disheartened with that. As long as your out there trying something you’re getting closer. The only failure is stagnation!
Dear Matt, happy new year.
My wish is that I will stop liking men who don’t like me. I’m very susceptible to this phenomenon and it’s driving me crazy. I have a crush on a guy now for about 3 months and yet nothing has happened yet but he does like to flirt with me, and I know that he’s dating other women. But for some reason I feel it in my heart that he is the man I always wanted. My friends say that I should approach him, but I’m too selfish and I fear rejection. And I know that the only thing he is willing to offer me now is only sex, but I don’t want just that. And even if he wanted to sleep with me, I wont give him the satisfaction of also sleeping with me. Plus I feel stupid telling him how I feel since he hasn’t shown a big interest in me.
Finally I need to be less romantic and emotional and understand when men just want to flirt for the sake of being and that they didn’t mean anything by it. Hope in a year from now I will be in a happy and loving relationship!
I have a rule in my life “If they don’t adore me they’re not right for me”. You might benefit from reminding yourself of that rule. It doesn’t mean you shouldn’t put yourself out there and take risks on guys (otherwise you’ll never know if they could like you), but it also means you don’t tolerate people who don’t give you their all.
It’s going to be an exciting 2012 for you, I can feel it!
I know! x
So, is she with a guy or did she just want to have a baby. The story is kind of incomplete.
Yes she’s with him, they are very happy together! : ). She just sent me a picture from the hospital of all three of them together, so lovely!
Hi Matt & Team
Beautiful story Matt :) like Serena’s story too … very similar situation at present for me, good timing!. Sadly i’m going to find it a struggle to attend the Januarys meet that i was looking forward too that i’v paid for & NO i am soooo cool that although i’v already purchased & not looking good to attend i’m so happy to read & have the bits of info available now as its all been very helpful which to me is £20 spent WELL already! … BIG THANKYOU :)
Ps: The travel from Cornwall to London has proved the challenge so hope you will have a meet availiable nearer southwest sometime X
Hey Maria! Thanks for your support, and for attending my event!
Unfortunately it’s difficult to travel around to all different places since I still personally deliver all of the events myself! Maybe at some point in the future I’ll have coaches delivering them without me, but for now I’m committed to doing it myself for as long as I possibly can!
I look forward to seeing you again in 2012!
Well i could go into a long drawn out story about things but i wouldn’t. What i hope for this year is for things to turn around more then they have. I’m still with the same guy. He’s a tough nut to crack though. I do want to thank you for helping me get my confidence back and helping me gain some new confidence. I look forward to more of your e-mails so i can learn how to maybe turn this relationship around and become 100% confident. I am doing very well though and even my friend says she’s seen a change in me. It does seems though that at times it’s one step forward two steps back. I’m looking forward to just enjoying my life and a lifetime friendship with my guy. Whether or not things work out.
Great attitude Amanda! It’s all about the person YOU become. When you become great, the only question that remains is “is he willing to meet my standard?”. If he can’t, you will find something better in your life, even if you do remain friends.
Thanks for your support, I’ll keep giving you as much as I can to help!
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