Everything Wrong with Dating Today

In this week’s video, I’m going to go wildly off script and dive into these issues to explain exactly what you need to know to win in dating in 2019.

Believe me: This message will help you avoid the traps I’ve seen too many single men and women fall into…

Let’s Continue this Conversation and Grow Stronger Together. Leave Your Comment Below.

9 Texts No Man Can Resist

139 Responses to Everything Wrong with Dating Today

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  1. Brenda says:

    one of your best videos ever! You may not have changed dating but you changed my outlook. Thank you :)

  2. Ashley Johnson says:

    This is one of my favorite Matthew Hussey videos, both because of how candid it is, but also because of the solution. Thank you for being so passionate about what you do!

  3. Karen says:

    Thanks for bringing this up. I do appreciate your take on it. As I am bringing up two children, my son is 8 and my daughter is 12, I am perfectly willing to wait for 10 years so you can to teach this generation coming up that novelty and shallow sex is not worth it. Please please somebody do something now.

  4. Nelly says:

    This was a nice and true speech… thx

  5. Amy Allen says:

    I’m with you, Matt. Let’s stop focusing on what we can’t change and putting our energy instead into learning how to better communicate with one another. I am here to learn from you. Keep the lessons coming! Thanks from the Lone Star state!

  6. Adri Slabber says:

    Thank you!!! This message was well prepared and came from your hart..
    Adri

  7. Ma Smoot says:

    Thank You, Thank You, Thank You. Dating today is so very hard. Thanks for giving women hope of meeting a good guy.

  8. Laurie says:

    Brilliant message, Matt! So on point: we can’t control others or outside circumstances; if Life’s not going to get easier, we should focus on ourselves, on making ourselves stronger. Great advice!! Love it. Thank you for the wisdom you share and your thoughtful videos. :)

  9. Patty says:

    I really appreciate you taking the time to talk to us about this and the positivism of your work it really cheers me up

  10. Anonimoose says:

    We can’t control what guys are doing but we can control the choices we make. I gave up accepting bad behaviour from men. I gave up trying to be “perfect” or skinny or made up all the time. I figured I would make my life great and still keep looking but make sure that I was happy without a guy. Really happy not just faking it. About a month after this change perhaps less I met a wonderful man. I have not had to compromise in any way at all. He is smart, kind, thoughtful, exciting to be with, handsome… We have been together for about 5 months now and he is the one. I am pretty sure of it. Still giving it time to be absolutely sure but I adore this man. He really is exceptional. I have never had anyone treat me as well as he does. Never been able to have the discussions we do with anyone else. Never been able to be as honest with both my expectations and my concerns as I am with him.

    The thing is though. He had the same problems we have. None of the women he has dated before have told him he is handsome or smart or fun so his confidence was in the toilet. I figured he was just shy (which he is) but turns out its more than that. So don’t judge on gender, just judge them on their actions and if you are not happy with it speak up and get rid sharpish. I had 7 years of thinking I wasn’t worthy before I was able to let it all go and just be myself and allow the best bits of me to shine.

    If you don’t want dick pics then don’t respond and hit block. If you get fed up with “ask me” profiles then don’t respond to them. If some guy is messing you about and keeping you dangling then just get rid as fast as you can. Learning to see and recognise the signs is so important. Learn them, practice saying no with out fear of guilt. Make better choices. It worked for me so I am sure it can work for others. Being in a relationship isn’t the be all and end all. Its just a bit of cake after supper.

  11. Patty says:

    I really appreciate you taking the time to talk to us about this and the positivism of your work

  12. Weronica says:

    U are such a good man, matt.what u say is so tru.we need to walk thru the bad to become stronger.luv is a challenge.But we all do find luve eventualy.Hang in there!

  13. Pam says:

    Dating is ovrated today, but aren’t we? The male and female, who are now stuck in this non old fashioned way of dating. Well on my man’s defense, and even on my own, here’s my response:

    I was looking for love at 62! Yes you heard me right. At 6302 I found myself in a position of not wanting to spend the rest of my years alone.

    I joined several dating sites, and thru meeting ( well virtually meeting) lots of me, sifting through the rights and wrongs, on both parts, I learned from the experience.

    I think that’s the key to today’s dating, learning. I met my boyfriend through an app just by chance. I sent him a message explaining we had nothing n common, but just that I thought he was the most sexiest handsome man I had seen on the dAting site.

    Not expecting him to write back, because we shared nothing in common…I sent it. A week later he answered me and asked, *are you sure you don’t want to get to know each other?”. I was surprised, but thought, “how cool is this.”. We started chatting, laughing, finding things we ZDID both like and share. We started out as friends. Because he lived in Ottawa and I was 8 hrs South…we just kept chatting online. Then he called me. And we started conversing on the phone. Which led to writing letters to each other. Mind you, it has been several months now, he’s out of Towne on business, (which we talked about), but before he left, he told me he mentioned me to his sister. I was flattered. Then when he was visiting her, she lived in the UK, I met them, his family, over the phone.

    It was through all of our “online dating” that we noticed we were becoming closer. We went just “friends ” anymore.

    He comes home next week and we are planning our long awaited meeting. We’ve known each other for over 3 months now, but it has been like old fashioned dating-getting-to-know-each-other nerts girl-guy calls girl-guy meets girl….it’s just taken awhile.

    I can honestly say, that we love each other, he has said the same; whether thru destiny or divine intervention, we met, not knowing anything about each other.

    My point is, share with your lady followers and the guys too, that old fashioned dating can happen, online, through internet descripency, and work. I’m nervous about meeting hut excited. I don’t know what the future holds, but I’ve learned a lot. Thank you for ALL your videos, workshops, and such. It has so helped me.

    I told my bf I had a “relationship” coach, and he actually said he felt flattered,bthat I cared so much. Thx Matt for all your hard work. I’m not sure what is around the corner for us, but investing in time has paid off.

    A faithfulful follower,
    Pam

  14. Momi Greene says:

    Very Understandable. I Hear You From Your Heart.
    Thank You

  15. Ameejo Taylor says:

    Matthew I really appreciate everything you say… some of the comments of women that are negative well they are generally negative all the time…about dating sites … the point about dating sites is a longer reach… I live in a community of about 1200 people and I am not attracted to any of the men that live here so I have been forced to go on dating sites for who I am looking for…it takes perseverance … it is not going to happen right away in most cases…we all need to slow down and learn to relax and like you said, Matthew, focus.

  16. Laura says:

    Thank you, Matthew, for acknowledging what any woman who has ever put herself “out there” already knows. On line/app dating (actually there’s no such thing as we don’t really “date” on line!) serves a purpose. It’s meant to expose you and potentially introduce you to people you may have never met otherwise. And because there are literally THOUSANDS of men on line, sorting through to find a gem here or there is a daunting, tedious, and highly time consuming process. Lots and lots of frogs so to speak. I personally believe out of the entire pond, there are about 3% that are worthwhile. And even then, you have to click with one another. I’ve met about 80 men in the past 3 years. That’s a lot of coffee and lunch dates! Only 3 were interesting to me. One “got away”, one turned into a 16 month serious relationship that wasn’t meant to be, and the last (by far the best) is that rare gem. You can choose to gripe, make poor choices, blame all the crummy men, give up…..or…..put on your game face, strap on some courage, genuinely invest in the process, have fun in the meantime, and have faith that maybe, just maybe…. you’ll find it. But you have to be willing to put in the work!

  17. Vicky Russell says:

    I love all your videos and advice. It’s so grounded. I think I need help with men say and do rude or in appropriate things. What approach is best to set firm boundaries for respect and to show them how to treat me, without being to harsh and pushing them away. I think that’s my number one problem. I don’t tolerate much and my approach needs tweaking. Lol.

  18. Anna Dxb says:

    Matthew , you are so right. You speak on behalf of all women. We really suffer these days. It’s a daily discussion between us, ladies.
    It became really challenging to find someone who is really into you and doesn’t invite you to the bedroom straight away. I thought we only have this issue here in Middle East but looks like a global problem now‍♀️

  19. Suz says:

    So i do get what you’re saying – we can’t control others and their behaviour and we don’t have to accept their behaviour either if it seems uncaring etc. I think if someone doesn’t meet me halfway and put the same effort in, then i’m not going to chase them. I’d rather be single than be with someone who doesn’t treat me with respect etc. However I do think sometimes its hard to decide if a new guy is worth continuing with as no one is perfect and people are going to mess up at times and so it’s hard to decide whether to give someone a chance to show they can understand your standards, versus knowing straight away they will never change. it isn’t easy!

  20. Elaine porterfield says:

    Hibmatthew. I’ve just bought your book to start reading tonight! Was watching your video also…for such a young man to know what makes us tick was very enlightening to listen too. I’m sure I’ll pick ups one tios as I continue to read it xxx I’m 63! Have I got time?!

  21. Monika says:

    Thank you Matthew, for saying and expressing how bad things are with online dating but yet 100% encouraging us women to keep believing in love. I have been online dating for some 2 years and the outcome is frustrating and deeply heartbreaking. Just how people interact and behave because they are anonymous is really bad. I am just about to give up hope on finding love. Men are just are never available or play with several options at the same time. As you rightly say we cannot change this but only keep being strong. Digital dating has sadly evolved form something positive when it started out to something really challenging and negative. It does not seem working for me but yet I keep trying.

  22. Claudia says:

    I like a guy. Been sleeping with him for 5 months. All on his terms. And he is still hurting because he was engaged to be married and they called it off. A year ago. He’s not over her and she keeps messaging him frm time to time. But she’s seeing someone else. I like him so so much. I’m attached. He doesn’t want anything serious. Of course. But I don’t wanna lose him and stop now. But it’s consuming me.

  23. Shamiso says:

    Have been on few dating sites, they are more good to leaving you with heartache depression, and decreasing oneself esteem. Deleted them all, and more focused on building myself.

  24. Shirley Wells says:

    Really powerful message . I am older than your mother Matt but will not give up to find the man that will bring magic to my life ! Agree that the way we used to date brought so much excitement to see that person again without the dating apps today some would say to meet people would be difficult . I have my feet firmly planted on this earth but when the wrong guys appear they get the flick and I get back on that horse! Your advice is very encouraging and helpful. Thank you

  25. Cindy says:

    This video is RIGHT ON. OTTIMO — bravissimo! You hit the nail on the head! “Novelty addicted” — that’s the exact term to describe a huge percentage of males (I won’t even say “men”). Ladies: there ARE guys out there who are NOT like this. Might I add that I truly doubt that you’re going to find one on a “dating” website any more than you would find a vegetarian in a fast-food burger chain!

  26. Jennifer says:

    Thank you so much for addressing this Matt. I was one of those people that commented in that thread about my frustrations with the gap in healthy relationship coaching for men. I appreciate you responding to this, and when you said I hear you, I felt it. I actually started to cry. I’m an artist and did an art project last year in which I infiltrated an online pick up artist forum and posed as a former PUA/wannabe life coach for men. As a fake, or a troll, as many call it, I gave advice to guys advocating for open, and (paradoxically) honest communication as well as an abandonment of strategies of manipulation and misogyny. I had a lot of guys on the forum reach out to my alter ego and open up. But recently I’ve had some people reach out and ask for coaching from me, not my alter ego. I don’t feel fully equipped. I’m not a real relationship coach like you.

    I can’t imagine what it’s like for you to receive the frustrations, demands and needs of hundreds of people on a daily basis. I generally don’t make commentary on social media (despite what my art project might indicate), but I can tell you what moved me to do so on that day, aside from personal frustration, it’s primarily because your words resonate with me. Your work thoughtfully addresses a lot of the issues that myself and so many friends are dealing with and the way you communicate advice is a gift that has had a deep impact on me, not only as an artist who is invested in these topics, but mostly as a woman who is currently struggling with communication and setting standards in my own 1 year relationship. Thank you for doing what you do and for taking the time to respond. It is so appreciated and it is very touching.

  27. Jane says:

    Maybe these women should stop the online dating if it is giving them so much trouble. I have never tried it, and now for sure I will not! I met my boyfriend at church, and sex is off the table, and he is a wonderful Godly man.

  28. Rita says:

    Thanks Matthew for the video, I learnt alot from it,in life I have always seen men like destroyers,have never trusted any man not even the man I have kids with,I have always said I will get a good one but time and again the worse one comes my way,today I watched this video with my son we were both touched,he was like mum if dad disturts you again I will stop him from being my dad.

  29. Amy Johnson says:

    Thanks Matt, you da best <3

  30. AP says:

    I really appreciate your acknowledgement of thus. I gave followed and put into practice alot if what you have said in the last two years and although it has not yielded a relationship, it has shaped the way I think and act with men. The equipment you have provided me with has saved me from many guys I probavly would gave given more energy to were not investing un me because I was lonely. Your video on loneliness was still the most powerful video I have watched.

  31. Linda says:

    Your advice is excellent, I was married for 23 years and divorced after my husband had an affair. I applied your methods even before I’d ever heard of Matthew Hussey. I reinvented myself as a stronger person and went onto a better more fulfilled me. Although 13 years along here I am again and another failed relationship, after 4 years of happiness my younger partner decided he wanted out as he needed to discover more about himself.
    I’d invested a lot in this relationship, not only my heart but a lot of encouragement for his future.
    His words to me when he left, “I know its selfish but when we met, you were just what I needed”

  32. Mara says:

    Excellent video and very well said! I love it! Thank you Matt and your team for continuing to provide guidance for navigating the realities of not only the dating world, but that are applicable to other parts of my life.

  33. Dawnelle Dame says:

    I very much agree with you Matthew, as women, new to the dating scene again, I am fully aware that I can not control everything around me including the men I meet but i remain vigilant in what I can control..thank you so much for sharing your views in this

  34. Mani says:

    Thanks for being there Mat. I feel motivated seeing your videos.getting stronger.. God bless

  35. Smilen says:

    Very true we must be strong i have a questions
    1 i am single parent for 7 years
    2then i met guy one of the famous in Philippine he’s a actor and politics
    3 we fall in love each other for 4 years. Then i realize i give up. Because he have a first wife and second wife.
    4 the first wife and also the her kids knows me we met already for how many times. Because every 3 months my boyfriend ask me to fly to philippine.
    5 the first wife told me i must married the exhusband because she dont like the second wife also her kids.
    6 buti give up last year because i dont like to hurts anyone
    7until now they call me also the kids us me to back to him dad.
    8what will i do
    9 please can you give me advived for me
    Thank you so much
    God bless and family

  36. Ju says:

    So does this explain why a guy flirts heavily via texting for weeks, invites you to visit him(he resides in another city) and then sussently shuts it down.with no explanation, hardly even staying in touch even though you’ve had a friendship for years? In essence, comes and goes when it works for him. He gets bored, distracted, whatever. The sad thing for the ‘relationship ‘ is that this interaction, as much fun for both as it was, will NEVER happen again for the simple reason that I will not allow it to.
    Super video, btw!

  37. Katrina says:

    Wow, Matt! I started watching the video thinking “yeah, yeah, whatever”. Then about at 6:35 into it, I felt your sincerity, and it touched my heart. I felt the truth that you were dropping — and that I need to not just listen but to actively work harder to become stronger. Your last bit about life not getting easier… 100% attention, energy, and investment to becoming personally stronger is brilliant. I am raising three teenage sons, and they are my heart and soul. I know that some other mom out there raised a son into a good man for me. Just gotta find one another! Thank you for speaking from your heart

  38. Lori Mintzer says:

    Wow Matthew… you hit it out of the park with this video! Everything you touched on is exactly everything I’ve been experiencing with online dating… EVERYTHING! I’ve become so frustrated with the men and these antics, I feel the need to pull myself out of the dating pool every couple of months and take a break from dating just so I can regain my footing, and build my self-esteem and self-confidence back up. Your weekly videos and the things that you write keep me afloat and keep me grounded overall, so thank you for that! But THIS video…? It showed me that I’m not crazy with what I’ve been experiencing and that it’s just not me experiencing it. THAT is invaluable! You rock! Lots of love, Lori

  39. Wandakate says:

    I am a senior citizen and just turned 70, however my mind is 45 I think on most days. I am young at heart. Don’t hang out with people my age (they’re not young enough for me)…
    I met men online, and it goes well for a few weeks (at least I think it’s going well) and then some of them ask me for money, ITUNE cards and various other “goodies”. They were apparently never serious, it was ALL a game about what they wanted to get out of me. I have only met a few that were not OUT for something like that, but many were. Scammers abound it seems. I never sent anyone a dime b/c I already am fully aware of their games, but it’s difficult to know when they’re serious and when they’re not b/c they will tell you “anything”!!! Most are just HUGE liars!!! Most don’t really want a relationship, and if they do they don’t know how to go about getting it started.

    The other problems is that they don’t want to E-mail or if they do they are one-liners. They don’t pay attention, they don’t like to answer questions, and they basically can’t keep up with the communication. They fall by the wayside and get 2-3 days behind on writing back and answering my e-mail that I sent them. They’re also bad about texting. They seem to lack any “common sense” unfortunately !!!
    They don’t ask me questions about my life or what I am all about. They just don’t seem to know how to communicate to get the relationship off the ground and rolling into anything constructive or they’re just plain lazy and NOT motivated. Something is wrong with MOST of them. I only found 2 that would keep up, one was 84 at the time, he was sweet and would write everyday (a Pisces) and the other I am still e-mailing (as friends only) everyday since Sept.4th, and he’s 65 and (a Sagittarius). Otherwise they either wanted me to send them something (last one wanted $3,500 to help pay for surgery for his mother with cancer)…lol, or they just drop out. Here today, gone tomorrow. SO, my hopes are not very high and I really want and need a friend, a companion, a soul mate and yes a lover (my libido is high). WHERE IS MY PRINCE CHARMING?????

  40. Meagan says:

    I’ve already given up. With so many awful experiences, first dates/relationships, etc. I have a huge wall now. I’ve also been single and on my own for a long time. I know my worth and what I want and need. It’s going to take a strong understanding and patient man to break this wall. One brick at a time. I cannot be bothered with self-righteous insecure man. I would rather be alone and happy than in relationship and miserable. A lot of people stay in toxic relationships and I will not. I have children, and they mean the world to me. I’ve had too many bad experiences with men falling all over me in the beginning and then all of a sudden ghosting me because they are intimidated after they see how independent I am and what I have to offer. I think social media has destroyed all respect for true love and honorable relationships. There are too many options for men because women give things up too easily. And for us women who don’t who respect ourselves well quite frankly most men don’t want us.

  41. Annette says:

    Thank you for this video Matt! I am 55, divorced for 2 years and am trying to weed thru the men who are hooked on “novelty” as you have described. I once asked a counselor how I would know if a man was telling me the truth. They are so willing to chase and give praise, want to spend time with you in the beginning but once you really get to know them you see they are either not how they portrayed themselves to be or once they get bored they seek out another women to get the hormonal high. My counselor told me there was no way to tell but to back-pedal once their story started falling apart.

  42. Lindsay Erickson says:

    Thank you soo much for ure latest video, it can be difficult to get caught up in what’s wrong while trying to stay positive and continue to put ureself out there!! Thank you for your support and effort. I used one of your texts on a guy where we had plans but I didn’t hear from him with the details… i sent the text, I wasn’t passive and he responded in a very positive way where he set up another date with a place and day… thank you!!

  43. Lucy says:

    Very encouraging, keep on encouraging us, you are doing a good job mattew

  44. Chris says:

    Hi Matt,

    Interesting video for sure. The challenge of not being connected as man is true for many of us due to work/life balance or in my case proximity to larger towns with people to meet spontaneously.

    The question of men and commitment gets posted and discussed often through podcasts like ‘The Gender Knot’ etc which I think although true are sometimes true are sinplifying the point. Many men such as myself get so excited when you do get to interact with someone and I always find it puzzeling to hear that this trait is uncommon.

    You’re videos are typically right on point keep it up.

  45. Meredith Miller says:

    Good advice! We can’t change culture and as Terrance McKenna said, culture is not our friend. It doesn’t mean give up. It means we need to have fierce standards as Matthew said in this video and not invest our resources in men who’ve caught the novelty culture disease. I’m an expat dating in Latin America and in addition to the novelty-lust fascination hurdle, the vast majority of men here are mysogynistic and hate successful women because a successful and independent woman feels threatening to their ability to control and be needed. Women get killed here for being financially independent and before they’re killed they’re raped and tortured. These are called feminicidios. Sometimes this hatred for women is very subtle but it’s there in the little ways a man will try to sabotage a woman after acting on his best behavior for weeks. I’m not giving up on finding my man. Every time I learn a new lesson, I keep raising my standards and setting the necessary boundaries that protect me from wasting my resources on a man who only wants to bring me down as soon as he reveals himself for who he is. I don’t use dating apps because they’re full of personality disordered men like narcissists, sociopaths and psychopaths as well as your run of the mill emotionally unavailable cowards and non-committal players as well as the Mr Nice guys with integrity problems. Instead I create experiences for myself to enjoy life and I believe I will meet the right man in an experience that he is also enjoying. I’m careful of being realistic while also not letting the scarcity mindset take over because that leads to a self-fulfilling prophecy. I keep redirecting myself to abundance, gratitude and faith. Even when another dickhead reveals himself, I let myself get angry at first for how he thought he could get away with treating me and that helps me enforce the boundary. Then after he’s gone I redirect to gratitude that he revealed himself. Next! I know that when my man shows up I’m going to appreciate him because I had to go through all of this to find him. Keep your standards high, ladies and know your worth!

  46. Lorena says:

    Bravo and thanks for a honest and sensitive video.

  47. Lynn R says:

    Well stated. And, thank you. While I’ve not written in about this theme, and while I’ve understood your approach and why you do what you do, hearing you articulate it is really meaningful and touched me deeply. There are a million issues out there in all arenas of life and, while my one goal in life is to be empowered and equipped, sometimes just taking a moment to acknowledge that I have to come home and shower off the shit–and what kind of shit it is–really helps. Taking that moment to acknowledge helps me feel not so alone, not so despairing, and reinvigorates my desire to do what I know to do and continue seeking the finest people in life who share the same values of empowering themselves and others and engaging with the parts of life they can control and creating an amazing life! Thanks again for your thoughtfulness and attention to the hearts out there listening to you…

  48. Dawnena says:

    GREAT VIDEO! Love your openness and transparency. After reading your books and watching your videos for several years, I knew it was up to me to be accountable of my emotions and who I date. I believe in the law of attraction. Focus on what I want then what I want will come into my life. If I focus on what I don’t want then what I don’t want comes into my life. I’ve been working on myself since my divorce. I take responsibility for my actions in the marriage. I refuse to blame my ex husband and the father of my four children that it’s his fault I’m the way I am. I grew 25 years with him. He chose not to grow up which is fine with me. I couldn’t change him. I focused on what I could do myself. He chose to walk away and find a woman who could mother him. It was the best decision ever. Now I’m I’m dating scene. It feels good to walk away from what doesn’t benefit me anymore. I’m stronger and I know your videos mean well. It means you want us to focus on the GOOD. What we focus attracts us. Keep up the amazing job. You’ve got my support. ❤️❤️❤️

  49. Terri says:

    Hi Mathew, I agree with what you said! I am well aware of the fact I need to concentrate on myself. I have stopped dating at all at this point. I’ve gotten more insecure with myself than usual. I feel that it’s me that’s causing the types of men I attract and that it’s also me that allows men to treat me like they have. Not that my dates/relationships have been physically abusive, I just seem to allow myself to be taken for granted. Growing weary and not getting any younger!! Lol
    Thanks….

  50. jeanfreau claire says:

    Thank u for that video. Now please tell us where to find the men that could possibly want something g real.. that aren’t completely focused on looks and sex. And after you do that please tell us what to do to interest one of these 40 to 50 age group of men. Please don’t tell us to love ourselves blah blah.. I do love myself. I’m a great catch! I’ll never be perfect but overall I know that I am a desirable woman. Tell us what to do to find one of these guys and how to get one. Tell us how to not become cynical and turned off by this dating culture because after three years divorced that’s what has now happening. It’s exhausting and futile most of the time. Thank you Matthew, if you help women to do these things I’ve mentioned I would buy whatever program you are selling.

  51. Debbie says:

    Matthew,

    I agree with you 100% – only I have the ability to change my situation. Taking risks is hard for anyone but no more so for someone who was burned terribly in a previous relationship.

    I want a real relationship not a mediocre one or a half in half out scenario. I also know that I am the one who needs to change the way I let people treat me. Standing true to what I want is something I cannot negotiate with anymore… Thank you for this inspirational session

  52. Sheri says:

    Thank you so much for addressing this concern. I respect your position, both in noting the “ADHD” culture we are in, and choosing to be positive and proactive. Great men are out there. I’m dating one and have two brothers in the dating scene again. Focusing on our empowerment and right communication is key.

  53. Sue Higgerson says:

    A-bloody-men!!!!!! I have been saying this to people for ages now. Online dating has so blurred the boundaries of what is acceptable in relationships in a way that I really don’t like. I met who I thought was a wonderful man online in the Spring. By late Summer it was over. The reason? He could not commit and had serious intimacy issues. The reason? He refused to come off his dating app. Apparently I ‘needed to trust him’. That had nothing to do with trust and everything to do with respect. The result? I was gone.

  54. Rosa says:

    Nice video Matt. I totally agree with you.it seems that a dating process and finding love have become more and more about how selfish you are compare to how selfish is the other person. More likely they will be separated because they got bored in the lack of effort of the other about the amount of investment in the relationship. Anybody is thinking in getting deeper, just to have exciting moments meanwhile something more exciting appears. I really miss the times when people really tried. But it doesn’t mean you need to be the same. That’s why being yourself in a relationship and being present and sometimes giving the best of yourself wisely could give you the opportunity someday to find a person who is able to do the same and finally compromises with you. So I’m hoping to find this even when I have been just failing in the intent….

  55. Deborah Christine Tsavaris says:

    Matthew, BRAVO! I’ve bought your latest book (How to Talk to Men) and I’m just starting to read it now. I think these two videos you do are wonderful because it really shows your potential customers who the author is. And a confidence develops enough to make a purchase because your readers and viewers feel that they have a real sense of who You are which is so important when you are receiving advice from someone. Anyway, I think this video was a god-sent blessing to so many you need to understand that regardless of all your fabulous spot on advice, that you understand that it’s not going to produce the results we want if we haven’t run into a quality man. And honestly, when you work from home, and you have children, or you’re like me who homeschools my child; so being at home is 90% of your life, and then you’re trying to apply the wisdom that you give us….. There are going to be many women who are conducting their entire dating life through online applications. And what you pointed out this week about online based dating being so full of complications, and the fact that you actually spelled them out, exactly what they are, I think really helped so many women to take a second look and really give it some thought as to whether or not they want to sign up on Match.com or other places. I used to do that, but I felt like a certain type of man is the type of man who signs up online. And I’m not saying that all men are like what I’m about to describe… but I think 90% or more of the men who do online dating make that their 100% means to accessing potential dates. And everything you described in this video about the fast-food aspect and dopamine rushes and they’re always being an idea of someone else or something better is mainstream in the guys that are doing dating online. And I think these are the guys that most easily don’t give any woman what they really want. And if we use your strategies on these men, we might be able to hook them for their next big rush, but what we catch in this Sea of Love won’t be worth catching. I personally fight the urge to sign up for online dating because there’s such a temptation to say to myself,”not enough people know that you exist oh, and how are you going to find mr. Right if no one knows you exist”. I ballroom dance and I go to my sons Little League games. So I’m constantly surrounded by the same people, who I’m either not interested in, or they’re not interested in me, or they’re married. So it’s not that I don’t get out. I just keep getting out around the same people. And that doesn’t give you a huge selection oh, this buffet of guys you talk about. So attempts you to go to the internet but I really think that there’s a certain type of guy on the internet that I’m actually trying to avoid, so it going there is like signing yourself up for a 100% chance of not being in the right place to meet the right guy. To make an analogy, it’s kind of like saying, “I don’t want to date a guy who’s fishing every weekend, and then you go rent a boat and see who you can meet on the lake” so that leaves the opportunity is like the grocery store to meet somebody. I’m 47 years old, but people tell me that they mistake me for someone in her thirties. I’m bubbly and vivacious and Goofy and driven and I used to perform in musicals and dance companies until I had a car accident that injured me to much to continue that career. So I would like to see a lot more videos about how women who stay home 90% of the time because their work is at home, their family commitments are at home, and their social life revolves around the same places on the same people, how these women in their 30s, 40s, or 50s can avoid the internet completely and still have revolutionary results in finding a life partner. I wish I could say that I had the financial resources to spend time at the golf course or do you a lot of adventurous things that I’m interested in so that I can put myself in the places where I would meet men with common interests. But my budget is so incredibly tiny that many times I’m just struggling to put food on the table and have a little extra to go do my ballroom dancing which means the world to me because it’s who I am. I dance from the age of four to the age of 37 and oh I’m not capable of ballet jazz and tap anymore, ballroom dance has been my last access to dancing after these horrible car accident injuries. So where can I go and what can I do to live this wholesome and limited life, and still have a great chance of meeting a life partner? Which means but I really have to take advantage of every situation I’m in whether I’m at the post office or the grocery store or at the park with my son just places that are free that people linger in…. And knowing what to do in face-to-face interactions where you’re not in a place that anyone is expecting to hit on someone or acquire a date, is more tough. because people are just going about their life and they’re not thinking about meeting someone when they’re going to the store to pick up some milk. And I don’t want to come across as someone desperate or too flirtatious, or a woman who’s just picking up guys everywhere she goes. And also there’s probably some advice that you would need to give us in terms of how to flirt with a guy at the grocery store and simultaneously figure out whether you’re flirting with someone who’s already got a girlfriend!!!! Can you help with these things? I hope you can. Because this person who’s writing you this comment is a fabulous individual who has spent the last 29 years caring for her divorced disabled mom, and now is raising a son on her own, and has survived breaking her neck in a car accident with lifelong sustained injuries, and I’m always putting everybody else first. And the thing I really want the most is for someone just to love me, someone whom I can fall into their arms and not have to be this warrior that I am twenty-four hours a day…strong for everybody, and having no one to pamper me a little and laugh with. I really need your help Matthew. And I also would like to know if you would read Mimi Tanner’s book, “Hard To Get”, and give a thorough review on it. Because she appears to have millions of followers who absolutely swear by her work and how effective it is. Like you, she has a huge following who claimed that her techniques work. I bought her book as well, entitled, Hard to Get. And as I begin to read both your book and her book, I’m wondering if you and her oppose each other in your thoughts. And here’s a wonderful idea for building your business… If you read her book and you felt so inclined to contact her, I think that you guys could make an amazing team in terms of creating a video, or short videos, or a book, in which she uses all of her techniques on someone like you, and then you give your honest responses, and inform your readers as to what a guy is thinking when a woman does what she suggests. it’s an idea you’d have to toss around in your mind a lot but considering the fact that she has so many testimonials but she has a completely different style than yours, I’m just wondering if teaming YouTube app could produce an expert duo of both the male and female versions of the best dating and relationship tactics. They say iron sharpens iron. And it would appear that both of you are iron. Now what would happen if you were put together? The results could be phenomenal! And you would both have the chance to share each other’s subscribers. Okay I’m done, but please remember all I said about being so how many pound and wanting to avoid guys on the internet, and how a woman could not make a fool of herself at the grocery store or the post office, looking like she’s trying to hit on a guy when she should really just be doing her shopping…. :P. Thanks for CARING, Matt!! You’re awesome!

  56. Lafrance antatiana says:

    I think I am the worst too , I want to change my attitude

  57. Tonya says:

    Hi Matthew, I thought this was a brilliant video and also so refreshing to hear. I worked out a long time ago that we can’t change other people – all we can do is change ourselves and be the best people we can be. There is also another point that when we work to grow ourselves, the kind of people who cause us such unhappiness resonate with us vibrationally less and less or we are able to recognise them and get out far quicker if they are not right. They just don’t have any place to stay. I think there are deeper beliefs at work such as the fear of being alone or ending up lonely. Once we enjoy the process of being on our own, being the best person we can be, I believe that energetically we can then attract a more committed and happier relationship if we choose. I love your videos as they are always such a good reminder of working towards the best me. Thank you!

  58. Daniela says:

    That was perfect and TRUE! Matt I am applying those standards not just in my romantic life but all areas. I am much happier now that I am valuing and loving myself!❤️

  59. Monika C. says:

    Hi Matthew, I appreciated what you said in this video. For what it’s worth: for me, it’s not about complaining, nor do some comments need to be framed solely as complaint. It is about having the harder, sometimes ongoing realities that we experience with men fully acknowledged. I think that you tried to do that here with respect to some important problems that we deal with everyday, which is good.

    I’d suggest to you that adding a few brief comments *on a regular basis* that acknowledges these and other challenges we face would only build trust, and would not be a waste of time. Generally in life, it is harder to take in or fully benefit from advice, no matter how good, if it isn’t clear that our struggles and efforts are first being acknowledged and understood. It doesn’t have to take much time to show genuine awareness and empathy, and we value ongoing recognition of that with which we struggle, and also overcome daily. The daily grind! I am fully in your camp about the importance of being proactive, and ultimately focusing my life energy on questions like “what can I do to move my life forward?’ – and I believe that I do this as a life practice. Just reminding that it is helpful and builds our trust to do both. It’s not always apparent from your videos that you do understand and empathize with what you discussed above, fyi, and everyone won’t see all of your videos anyway. My two cents. :P Good luck in your work.

  60. Kay says:

    Thank you. This year has been the worst year ever in dating. I feel like a douche-magnet attracting all of these broken souls. I’m 34, look like 24 and have dated men from 23 to 44 years old, so it’s not an age problem but a general one. For me it‘s not even possible to do the rotational dating advice other coaches give, as I can‘t even date one “good” man. And I hear the same from all of my single girlfriends. All the same terrible stories in different variations. It’s a challenge not to turn into a frustrated man-hater. That‘s why I just stopped dating altogether. This ADD culture in dating and in life is not good for my soul. Instead I‘m concentrating on myself and friends and family. If a guy wants to date me, he will have to become my friend first. I‘m so so done with this sh*t. I wish all of you out there luck, love and happiness.
    Merry Christmas

  61. Michele says:

    Right on! I’ve been divorced for 3 years now and become quite disenchanted with dating. BUT… it has all made me stronger. Taught me more about myself. I’m the happiest I’ve been in over 20 years. Matthew’s advice has more than helped me on this journey. You have helped me understand my own experiences and how men and women are just hardwired differently. I love the positive, proactive approach you take. Women need to stop with the victim mindset. Find our happiness and power in ALL the things we do. Stop wasting so much time on who is not in our life, and embrace who is. You’ll be surprised what happens when we change our focus. There is peace and serenity awaiting! Thank you Matthew Hussey for heeding your call to help WOMEN. Thank youfor being a good man. Good men still exist ;)

  62. Christina says:

    So true, Matthew! I think, if we don’t want to get caught up in that frustration, we need to start getting out of that game. Online dating “seems” to offer more opportunities, but it ends up being so frustrating and discouraging that it destroys yourcself confidence or you end up playing the same games. We need to start coming out of our self-imposed isolation and put ourselves in places where we are meeting real live people in casual situations outside of dating.
    For the first time in 7 years of dating, I met someone at a friend’s birthday party. I wasn’t looking at him as anything other than a team member in a game of charades. After I left he asked my friend for my number because he said he was “smitten”!! He’s been “courting” me ever since. It is SO REFRESHING to just be me and accept his interest without wondering who else he’s talking to online or if he’s having “meetups” while I sit home wondering. Who knows what will happen? But at least this is a comfortable, natural start where we are both enjoying the natural process. I just needed to step out of my comfort zone a little and accept an invitation to a party instead of staying home again on a Friday night.

  63. J Jackson says:

    Hey Matt is it okay to be alone with your self I don’t even think that I don’t even have the same feelings as they do for me

  64. Jacqueline M Wise says:

    Very well said. And very true. I like the slot machine analogy. It puts things in a better perspective. And yes we do need to get stronger and wiser because it is not going to get easier out there. Thank you again for your wise words ! And thank you for caring.

  65. Tina says:

    Great talk, Matt. I’ve been divorced for 7 years and during this time I have only had one long term relationship of 1.5 years which I ended because it was toxic. I’ve put myself in and out of the dating pool many times and most times left the scene because I was frustrated with my experiences with men. We all want to meet great people, men and women alike. As you point out with today’s instant gratification, we all want to meet that person now and lack the patience to go through the frustration of weeding out the wrong ones. I’ve only been following you for a matter of months, but I’ve found that people tend to focus on what they don’t have, rather than what they do have. I’ve had opportunities to put your scripts to work and I have seen a change in how men respond. It was only after I stopped focusing on being single and starting focusing on other areas of my life that I started to meet people outside of the online dating scene. I guess my caveat is this: focus on becoming a better version of yourself and don’t let the label of “single” define who you are. Time flies by so fast, so spend it investing in yourself and doing what makes you happy. Your life isn’t any less meaningful if you don’t have someone to share it with. Thank you, Matt, for your insight. It has helped me build my confidence (which was non-existent) in and outside of the dating realm, and has helped me to communicate more effectively with others. The personal work I’ve done on myself this year, along with your coaching, has given me the best time of my life so far, and I’m excited to see what 2019 holds for me.

  66. Janin Schindelhauer says:

    I take, joy, encouragement and excitement from your videos Mat. I like to see that you give no attention to the victim brainwashing, and still take a moment to acknowledge the pain women face in dating – compassionately. Please carry on being this radiant and beautiful human being. Amazing – bäähhmm.

  67. grace says:

    ok i still dont know where im going wrong. and what are the traps im falling into that im meant to avoid.

  68. Monika says:

    I completely agree with you on this. Complaining and nagging about what’s not working in this dating times won’t get us any further, just the opposit, will stress us even more. But I have to admit, it’s pretty easy to blame someone else or the circumstances in that matter. Every time people ask me why I’m still single I try to catch myself on negative thoughts and consciously change them into – what can I do to get better, to think better.. so thanks for this videos, learning is a process. We can and we are getting stronger day by day!

  69. Sharon says:

    I really appreciate this message. I am mom to three sons and have intentionally taught them how to treat a woman as a fellow human. My ex-husband is the ultimate role model for them. All three look at him and say “nope, not going to do this like dad.” Tony fellow women out there, fear not. There are good guys out there! So, this is a message for you Matthew – thank you for acknowledging the pain and frustration. I will not be waiting for a Hussey trained man. ;)

  70. Annette Preece says:

    Hi Mat,

    All good advice, as usual . But although you said your influence on men’s mindsets could take years and would we be willing to wait that long, no you are right we wouldn’t; however wouldn’t it be nice if our daughters and perhaps your future ones, were to benefit from that. Maybe start to dip your toe in to that sphere you may help many a man and in so doing many many women. Annette in Guildford

  71. Martine says:

    Dear Matt,

    This is definetly one of your best video!

    Thank you

  72. V says:

    Thank you so much for this video Matt. You’re absolutely right, don’t waste time, get stronger. Appreciate you taking the time to respond.

  73. Ket says:

    Yes, it’s true… I have the feeling that dating new people is getting worse and worse, the next guy is worse than the last, until I got to the point I am now, which is me in the need of 1 or 2 months recover from the last first-date I had (after lots of bad first dates), before going out to meet someone new again. But maybe it’s just a bad luck wave of trashy guys. I’ll try not to give up…

  74. Elena says:

    And something last.. You can’t make everyone happy, so don’t get anything personal. :) take it from someone who also works with people from around the world. Stick to your beliefs

  75. Liz says:

    The Las Vegas gambling machine analogy is perfect. It says it all. I gave up long ago and to be frank it has made me much, much happier. I just invest in all the other areas of my life and from those efforts, I get rewards.

  76. Elena says:

    You’re sweet, mature and intelligent. I absolutely agree with you. We need to be realistic, and see the difference between the lives we had decades ago and what we are facing now. IN ALL ASPECTS. We must live our life as it comes, with all the surprises, good and bad,and make the most out of it. Just a bit of positivism and determination. Thanks for all your advices :)

  77. Bex says:

    To Kelli, from one woman to another, it is clear what is wrong: Your attitude! The comment you make about “men’s bullshit” is really obvious you expect them to behave badly around you and that is what you attract. This is true in all areas of life. If you expect bad, that’s what you’ll find. Matt is right, you need to quit your whining.

  78. Nat says:

    Yes Matt, it is a very tough world with all the options and distractions out there, for girls and guys too and everyone is free to chose what they want. I chose to work on myself and grow personally, enjoying my hobbies. There is someone out there who I know I’ll meet at the right time. Patience and consistency will pay off.
    Thumbs up for all the efforts you and your team put out there to guide and help others.

  79. Sharon Allsopp says:

    Ouch Kelli!
    I respectfully disagree.
    I don’t believe Matt was being condescending in the slightest.
    He validated the frustrations, provided a rationale for the direction of his messages and clearly outlined that his aim is to shift the focus solely onto what each of us has the power to change – ourselves!
    I, for one, am tired of this “why does he do that”, “how can I get him to change” culture we live in.
    It’s not about him. It’s about me!
    What reaction do I need to change, what thought process do I need to shift, what action do I need to take, what behaviour do I need to engage in.
    So I see multitudes of strategies in all your videos, webinars etc Matt.
    They are educational (this is how men often think, act etc).
    They are enlightening (this response from you is likely to lead to this response in him).
    And therefore they are empowering (do this instead, work out your standard about this, communicate your standard in this way).
    From this empowered state, I get stronger. I take action. I get stronger.
    I see change (in me and in what I attract). I get stronger.
    And ultimately I will see the result.
    I don’t know when that will happen.
    And in some senses, I don’t care.
    I trust the process.
    I trust the strategies Matt communicates will weed out the ones who aren’t on the same page as me.
    And consequently position me to recognise and receive “equally strong men on our level”.
    I trust the outcome will be that I find these men in all sorts of places I visit as I live life to the full.
    In the meantime, I will enjoy the journey.
    So thanks Matt for all of the above.
    For your energy. And for your enthusiasm. Your authenticity and vulnerability is encouraging and refreshing.
    I have gained so much from my short time with you. And look forward to hearing many more gems of wisdom to add to my already overflowing jewellery box.

  80. Cristina says:

    I love all of your videos Matthew, but I especially love this one. I totally agree with everything you say, as it also applies in other areas of our life. Thank you so much for your meaningful help and commitment!!!

  81. jane says:

    thank you so much for this kind of reality talk because im the one girl that what to experience to dating a guy one guy but after we been together 2 days he dont see me anymore he only says that im attractive woman but he want me to find someone who could want a serious relationship just because his not like that kind of serious sad to know after we been through oh my god

  82. Fiona Campbell says:

    I’ve followed Matt’s advice for a couple of years and found that you can find really good men if you just follow what lights you up. The real men are not on dating aps, they’re out in the world doing what lights THEM up – having adventures, following their dreams and valuing the people who cross their path. So stop waiting for someone to do all the hard work for you and tell you what to do every minute of the day and get out there and live your life and you won’t be single very long, or at least you won’t be without a multitude of interesting options which weren’t there when you sat around whinging and blaming your solitude on a man who gives seriously good advice FOR FREE every week.

  83. Steph says:

    Yikes to the comment below. Did you want a magic answer?
    I’ve realised that I am not going to meet a special someone on these dating apps. It’s just not going to happen, I thought right instead of dating someone for a couple of months and then realising they have major issues, let’s use effective time management and date a few at the same time. Well apart from being exhausted, I just can’t be bothered with apps anymore, I’d prefer to meet someone naturally which means I have to live a more active life to meet people which can only be a good thing!!

  84. Elizabeth says:

    Hiya Kelli

    I disagree with you. I think his response says forget negativity because it gets you nowhere and do you want to be with these men anyway? He is not putting the blame on women for saying be stronger, simply just saying let it run of your back like water on feathers because you are going to experience asshats throughout your life. It’s never going to change and really he can’t change that but what he can do is help people like you and me who want help and advice to recognise the things we can’t change and invest the things we can, ie ourselves.

    Best of luck in your dating adventures, honey. I hope you find the one you are looking for soon. Stay strong and awesome!

  85. Tess says:

    Matthew, very well articulated. There will always be a percentage of men that have issues and this plays out in dating on every swipe. It’s frustrating and hurts as a woman but in the end, we need to be in love with ourselves first and these immature, insecure, lost men become insignificant in the scheme of things. I value your compassion to the feminine and I took it very sincerely so thank you for saying you care and understand our experience. I believed your authenticity. I do agree a shift in the consciousness of men would be supremely welcomed by many women worldwide l but we can only affect the here and now and live our best lives outside of a man. You rock and would have loved to catch up in Oz when you were here. Great show you did. I watched every episode! Stay amazing and educating the beautiful women of the world on their standards.

  86. Lesley says:

    I’m a widow of 66. Dating today is very different and difficult but I don’t blame men I actually think women need to ultimately take responsibility. If sex wasn’t so readily available men would automatically invest more time and energy into relationships. Perhaps it’s an age thing but I have standards that I won’t compromise. Don’t get me wrong, I look for intimacy in a relationship but I don’t subscribe to the ‘sex first’ theory. Even though time is potentially running out. (Laugh) Keep up the good work. Changing women’s attitudes will eventually change how men see us.I know that seems unfair but we have to deal with life the way it is, not winge because men’s brains are wired differently.

  87. Debra Chrapowicki says:

    Yes Matthew I so agree with your point that it being a scary place out there in the dating world.Having just venturing out there,still not having my first date yet, on social media is overwhelming. Not knowing who to trust, can’t read their body language, or apply anything I have learned from you. BUT, still believing that there are some great guys out there. I will just keep going out there. Somewhere is one who will be glad he didn’t play those games to be with me.

  88. Michelle Smith says:

    I absolutely love this video. I agree 100% with you. It’s us women that need to be strong , and not need the weak men that dont treat us the way they should. We make it easy for them.
    I will share this will Everyone I know.
    Keep up the good work

  89. Alex says:

    Thoughtful, insightful, helpful and most importantly hopeful. Stick with this man long enough and the worst of your options won’t even cause a ripple, they won’t have the time or the impact – move up, move on and don’t waste any of that beautiful energy complaining. Thank you Matt, some of us are getting there, I promise. x

  90. Em kay says:

    I just want to know how stronger I can get for things to work out for me. I was raped when I was 19yrs by the first boyfriend I ever had. That’s how I lost my virginity. It was very difficult for me to trust guys. But two years ago I tried to overcome it. I went for counseling then tried to date. This time I was open minded. I dated dated this great guy. He was very nice to me for two weeks. But then everything changed when he asked for sex and I told him I wasn’t ready. The relationship ended before a month.
    Then I met this other guy two months later. He was nice to me too and because I didn’t want this to end like the first one I slept with him. We dated for four months. Everything was great. We were so in love. Well that’s what I thought until he fainted one day at work and was sent to the hospital. That day I found out I wasn’t his only girlfriend. He was dating another girl for two years before he met me. I was his side chick but the worse part was he pretended he didn’t know me

    Is it me who isn’t doing the right things for guys to not take me seriously or what? I’m so close to giving up. Tell me something

  91. Georgina says:

    Thank you, Matt!

    The dating field is indeed harder. What it needs is people like you to remind us that there are good men out there!

  92. Rohini Suri says:

    Brilliant

  93. VG says:

    Well it’s good to know you are aware and that you can barely do anything about it. However, I am completely aware I do not want to spend time with that type of guys, problem is the percentage of those guys is extremely high. So finding that other guy interested in the deeper meaning of a relationship becomes extremely difficult, add to that the fact that I am an independent woman who has a successful career with little time for leaisure during the week. Men nowadays seem to be taken aback by women who have it figured out, so that’s another problem to the equation. It seems that if they cannot fulfill their biological design to be the care givers to a major extent, they are not interested. I want a man who can be part of an amazing team, who will get turned on by independence and intelligence and not feel belittled by it. So, that all reduces the pool tremendously for a person with little time to spend searching. Yes, if I try every day to meet guys statistically I’ll fins someone someday but it is exhausting and emotionally draining. For the last two years I could not be bothered with investing in guys who were not investing back and I stopped trying, i trusted that it would happen on its own if it was meant to. I just cannot be bothered with exposing myself so much to keep receiving the same bs when I have life figured out and I don’t need a man to be someone or something, I just need a man to share that with and grow together. Gosh, why is it so hard. Leadays? I’m sick of hearing women in our early thirties say the same crap.

  94. Martina says:

    Thanks Matthew for this new video!
    I hear also men also saying “there is no girl for me out there, I’m looking for the one but there are no serious girl”, and I’m like “are you even going out there to find a good woman??” (And btw, I am one of those good woman who wants a relationship! Hehe)
    What I also want to say is that is so easy to be bitter and complain about man (I do too sometimes), but good man are out there, like I am out there! And I’ve noticed a BIG, HUGE change in how men treats me and the way they are attracted to me, when I started to raise my standart, and show that I am freaking worth to date seriously! The game changed! I am more confident and men feels that!
    When I meet a guy who is suddenly in love with me I’m like “you could be in love with any girl right now” cause you don’t know me enough yet! I like when a guy takes his time to know me and to like me, and the same is for me on the other side. Confidence and standarts! Game changer!

  95. Sally says:

    I liked this video, lots of positive psychology in there.

  96. Silvia says:

    He’s literally giving you free advice and tools every week to identify the sort of men you should be dumping on the spot not to waste your time anymore and focus on the ones that actually make you happy. You seem to be expecting to be told where the “smart, talented, motivated, interesting” guys hang out, as if there was some sort of secret location where they are all hiding and you are mad at Matthew because he’s not telling you. Sounds ridiculous to me. Put your frustration to sleep and use his advice to make better choices and you’ll actually end up finding a good guy for you, I’m sure of it.

  97. Kelli says:

    What a condescending response—you know it sucks, you don’t have time to deal with it, you want women to stop telling you it’s hard because you’ve heard it enough and yet we should stick with you and get stronger? I’m strong. I’m awesome. Give me strategies on how to deal with the infantile bullshit of most men. My decades of being smart, talented, motivated, interesting and living a full life are leaving me with the same general “what up?” and “hey” and dick pics dating pool. What women are asking for is where to find equally strong men on our level and no one seems to be able to answer that. But I certainly won’t share my frustration with you in the future as you are over it.

  98. Shaunee Avelallemant says:

    I just love you and everything you’re alL about. Thank you for being positive and reminding others to do the same. I think the more I date the more I learn to value myself. I feel very blessed for my experiences and learning patience for my future partner. I find faith in knowing who I am and I’m enough. Looking forward to to the future by celebrating my present and learning from my past. Getting out of my own way to create the life I want with or without a lover.

  99. Stella says:

    Hi,im in a certain group on Facebook and on the 6 the December l posted my picture to this group called oldies and goodies for older people,about four men came into my inbox and told me they are interested in me,amongest l liked one from USA,hes single but with no children,he says he loves me and want to be with me but do distance relationship works? And how lm l going to know he’s that man lm looking for? Old Matt need your help

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