Get Any Guy To Approach You With This 1 Simple Trick

In this week’s video I want to show you how to get any guy to approach you.

He can be on the other side of the room…

You don’t have to say a word…

You don’t have to risk rejection…

And it’s so ridiculously simple, when I show you, you’re going to wonder why you haven’t been doing this all along.

76 Responses to Get Any Guy To Approach You With This 1 Simple Trick

Leave a Reply

Your email address will not be published. Required fields are marked *

  1. Carolyn Moore says:

    Very helpful!…Thank you Matt

  2. Amanda Mcphee says:

    Hi Matt! following your great advice, and the unthinkable happened, I was in my local bar I had supposed to meet someone there, well they didnt show up so I got so depressed. I was unbearable, and the most gorgeous man of my dreams was in the bar. I had the pleasure of meeting him, and then I left without saying goodbye and i’ve been regretting it for nearly 2 weeks now and I’m scared to go back to the pub because I dont want to seem desperate!Ps I’ve lost my phone number could I have Jamisons??

  3. Jill says:

    I thought I had found a great guy, i normally have a hard time trusting but this time it was easy. He was very clearly into me and it was mutual. He spoke of our future and everything made me believe this could be the man I want to spend my life with. I met some of his friends and he some of mine. Then he was telling me work got busy, and he was sick. The texts became a lot less frequent… Hours and days would pass and It felt like something would change. I asked him to call me and twice I explained how j felt and he reassured me and said it really was work, and acted like he was having a bear breakdown. I felt bad for him and tried giving him space, days passed and I struggled whether to stay or end things but I really loved him so I gave him the benefit of the doubt and then one Friday night I get a text from a friend, he was online on tinder. I felt like my heart was ripped out of my chest and I could barely breathe. I tried calling and texting and he didn’t answer me. I haven’t seen him since. This has been very hard to get over. I still believe in love but I am so afraid to get hurt again. How can I put my all into something, trust and love but protect myself? I saw zero red flags.

  4. Vikki says:

    I just got butterflies listening to this…I have been single for so long and all hope of meeting anyone was very distant for lack of knowing how..! Anyway, there is this guy at the gym who I am quietly attracted to and have noticed when I look up he is looking at me and vice versa. This has been going on for quite some time, one time I decided I was going to be brave and after he went into another part of the gym, I counted to ten and followed! When he saw me he gave me the biggest (most gorgeous) smile and carried on working out. I felt like a stalker and still nothing became of it. Listening to this I had a moment of confidence and thought next time I will wave him over..however I’m not too sure if this is a good idea..??

  5. amanda witkowski says:


    You are ABSOLUTELY RIGHT! One of my friends does it all the time, and works every time. The first time I did that to a really hot guy and when he came over I was like “oh crap. It worked!!” Helps even the shyest guys to approach.

  6. Laura says:

    Matt, this clip it’s so cute and funny!! I had a good laugh thanks to you!! And, I’ll practice your trick one day… Hopefully soon enough… Instead of going home and watch Netflix all night…(sigh) ;) lol

  7. tigress866 says:

    “I’m going to just go home and watch Family Guy” … !!??
    Bwahahahaaaaa!!! No. Just no. LOL
    you crack me up!
    Cannot wait to meet you in New York
    This Sunday!!

  8. mia says:

    well guess what ? I met a guy who was super hot !he was looking at me a lot times !! as we were waiting to be serve in a take away shop , I looked him once but as he was continuously looking at me , I turned my back pretending to look something else as I Was feeeling so bad ,but regret to not look at him as I was supposed to do , so i missed an opportunity to speak with him :(

  9. Ellen says:

    I tried this waving over just yesterday. It was really great, I had eye-contact with a guy for a while and then just waved him over and he waved me back over. I waved him over for three times, in about two hours, but he just didn’t come, till I finally went home. What can I do when something like this happens? Should I go over to him? Because, if he doesn’t have any interest, he would stop playing this game with me, wouldn’t he?

    • tigress866 says:

      Don’t bother wasting time thinking about it. If he’s a decent guy who’s interested, he will come over. If he’s narcissistic or not interested much, his waving back was just polite. Let it go. You dodged a bullet. Try again. :)

  10. chantelle says:

    Such great advice but doubt if it will pay
    Of :(

  11. Tiffany says:

    Your so good! Love this, I’ll have to try it out sometime.

    and yes, dark alleys are bad mang!

  12. Gem says:

    I’m currently in a relationship, so I won’t be trying this any time soon…… but it’s interesting, and if I were single, I might do it if the time and place felt right.

    Normally I prefer the man to make the first move, I’m just more comfortable that way. However, having met my bf on a dating site after he looked up my profile and contacted me—he’s asked me from time to time if I had seen his profile and why I didn’t contact him (first).

    I thought that was pretty interesting, but it’s not my nature to make the first move, even tho I didn’t see his profile first, he saw mine first. But he actually seemed bothered by the fact that if I had seen him, he would have liked me to msg him. (I guess times have changed?)

    For those ladies that are comfy with the wave–bravo! Nothing wrong with that. I think it’s just about working with what feels right to you. If it’s not your thing, maybe try to find something that you are comfy with. I liked JJ’s trip to the restroom idea, just don’t do it too often. I once had a guy (and eventually we connected and dated for a lengthly time) who actually said to me “I’ve seen you running to the restroom often, I was thinking maybe you had some kind of problem” (HAHAHA!) Oh well, it made for a good laugh.

  13. Margot says:

    Oh, man… Some people in this blog just need to relax… Relax!!! Stop over-analysing everything people do. Who can stand that?

  14. Maryam says:

    How is this risk and rejection free? I first have to build up solid eye-contact, I’m already too shy for that!

  15. dawn d fox says:

    how do I get him to want me and need me to be in his life As I want and need him to

  16. Jacqueline says:

    Please disregard my very, very long blog below. I think it’s best to get to know someone through dating them. What I want to share with all of you is that Matthew Hussey does know what he’s talking about. His advice is INCREDIBLE!!! I just got off the phone with a man I have never met. And he was open to, but didn’t want to do the dinner or coffee meeting. So, art museum it shall be. I do know how looooong those meetings can be and as Matthew has stated…A first meeting is best when you create an experience together and are side by side. Now I have to go back and review the entire program I purchased…it is worth every penny. Thank you, Matthew for ALL of your wonderful advice!!!

  17. Sarah says:

    I have always found myself wishing the guy I was making eye contact with for the whole night would just come over! This is such simple yet great advice. Thank you so much :)

  18. Jacqueline says:

    I also wanted to add, which Matthew probably did in his video, if you’re having fun and become more flirty with more eye contact; this is a cute way to meet someone.

  19. Jacqueline says:

    I love this idea! My LONG post doesn’t pertain to Matthew’s video, but a co-worker suggestd something she did many years ago. She’s now HAPPILY married the second time for many years. Quite interesting perspective on how this occured!!! She had many men friends and kept boundaries with them. She and her husband were friends. She was always thinking what a great man he is; she wants a man like that…but not him. They both were NOT attracted to each other; she thought he was to quiet and he thought she talked to much. As they got to know each other as friends; she realized he was quiet in the beginning, but as friends he was a phenomenal coversationalist. One day, she saw him across the street and her heart ‘thumped’ for him. She had become attracted. I met him last night when he came to work on my home computer. He’s so sweet, patient and kind. I’m 57, but this information may be helpful and apply to all women. (So many men that were gorgeous in their 30’s don’t always age well and I would be open for a little spark instead of the fireworks.) Yet, hearing this story again several years later….I’m thinking this may be an option. I dont’ want to waste my time, but it’s an interesting perspective. I know you are super sonic busy, Matthew, but I hope you can respond to this; especially knowing we have all read your articles on the ‘friend zone.’

  20. Angela says:

    Was that a wedding ring?

    • H. says:

      It looks like it, right? OMG Matthew did you get married? Congratulations!!

      • Vavavoom says:

        I could be mistanken about his status, nevertheless Matthew has been wearing a ring in many videos. Check out “meet my mom” and Chris Karazin videos on youtube.

        Matt also mentioned in an interview that he wants to be able to be there one hundred percent for a girlfriend and since he’s working so hard at the present dating/commitment is on hold. It’s in a written interview you can find on google.

        • tigress866 says:

          He’s had that same ring on his RIGHT hand in videos for perhaps a year?

          Wedding bands go on the LEFT.
          Unless he moves it for videotaping only.

          Which, could be possible. ;) lol

  21. Angela says:

    Young Bill Clinton sees Hillary in a bar with her girlfriends, gives his smile and waves at her to come over.
    Arnold sees Maria across the bar and waves her over…not happening.
    Can you say, “Arff…?”

  22. Brittney says:

    is Matthew Married?

  23. nawar says:

    I actually used that trick on my very first boyfriend! I was waiting for the bus outside college(with girl-friends), and he (and a friend) was passing by, then coming again and he kept looking at me… He did that like 3 times, and I waved at him to come. I separated myself from my friends and said “Hi”. I thought it was too daring and that he will always look at me like I did the first move or something. I always think of that moment like me being young and carefree, so I never did that again, now I regret it somehow, haha :D !!

  24. Lour says:

    I enjoyed watching you speak than anything. Too cute. I think Im going to do the wave over. Funny how something so simple is uncommon. Lets see where this gets me.

  25. Laurie says:

    Enjoyed this video. Very simple technique. Totally going to use it. And thank you for then adding the bit about what to say when he does come over. Brilliant :)

  26. Connie says:

    Love this one. And love your delivery. Too cute. Was smiling throughout. Cheers!

  27. Judy says:

    I really liked this video.. thank you Matthew for this simple information… I will try it tonight or tomorrow…

  28. Kathryn says:

    You look classy, cool and very British! It suits you, the no socks with suede loafers look. I used to buy shoes for a living, trust me I know what I’m talking about. X

  29. zineb says:

    Hhhh it’s simple and easy way and silly hhhhh

  30. Kristi says:

    Beautiful. Simple. Effective.

  31. Maria says:

    Hi Matthew,
    What if the guy doesn’t come over? How silly am I going to look for waving at him if he doesn’t answer the way I expect? This technique may be good, but it doesn’t sound so risk free to me.

    • kish says:


    • JJ says:

      Some men may not come over when a woman waves him over because it is like she is telling him what to do. He waves for you to go over to him but you say no by waving for him to come over to you. What it says to a man when a woman does this is, she cannot follow his lead. I ask her to come to me and she rejects my idea. But now I should do what she says and go to her. I woman should never tell a man what to do otherwise you become his mother an no man wants to Screw his mother!

      Often a man will reflect on what a woman said or did after their meeting and put the pieces together. In his mind he may go over and think its cute but after the fact he realizes, she wants to be in charge and that its something he doesn’t want in a woman so he never used her phone number to call her. She wonders why he never called and never knows it was her masculine gestures that changed his mind about her.

      Yes, I agree that no woman should cross a room for a man but this technique is too obvious. Its need to be more subtle way of teaching a man that a woman does not cross a room for a man and it is masculine for her to do such a thing. A man who waves a woman over is being uncherishing of her. He wants her to do the work and cross the room when a gentleman would not allow a fine woman to have to work so hard to please him. It says he is self centered instead of being centered around her and her welfare. This is a great way to classify the type of man you are meeting, a boy or a man. A man will not wave and but approach the woman and ask if he can join her and have the pleasure of her company. A boy will call his mama over to kiss his boo boos.

      Instead of a man waving a woman over he should send her a drink alcohol or coffee, tea… from the waitress having the waitress inform the lady who the drink is from. When she recieves the drink she will look his way and raise her glass and smile or reject the drink from the wait person. Her reaction will tell him if its safe to approach her. Once she has her drink he can approach her table and
      say, ” It looked like you could use another refill, would you also like some more company? May I join you?”. then he introduces himself. If she says no, he can reply with “Well, it was nice to meet you. I am still happy that I could give something to such a lovely lady.” That response may turn her head again and think twice about what a gentleman he is. Either way the man leaves the situation with a reputation as being a gentleman that is respected by her. Sending the drink also says to a woman, I want to take care of you. I can take care of you. I like taking care of you. That one gesture says so much to a woman opposes to the little boy who is too chicken to man up and take a risk so he waves her over to him. I roll my eyes at that gesture and immediately discredit him as any sort of potential mate.

  32. Alexia says:

    Perfect and Simple!Thanks!

  33. Kiraz says:

    Hi Matthew,

    One time I was sipping my drink at a bar. One guy just came over and started talking. We didn’t have any eye contact or exchanged smiles. I saw him but wasn’t interested. He casually came over and started asking,
    “Mary? Jane? Lucy?”
    “What are you doing?” me with a half smile and half serious face.
    “Well, you say Guess on your sweater, so I am guessing your name.”
    “There is no way you can guess my name, but I give you credit for trying.”

    I was wearing a Guess sweater that said Guess on its chest. hahaha! I chatted with him a little bit but still was not interested in him. I wasn’t attracted to *ahem* his looks. But, I thought it was funny and smart of him to start a conversation like that. Just wanted to share this short story here. :) xxx

  34. Rileigh says:

    AWW MAAAN!! I really wanted to do that in a dark alley! oh well. Lol. I really enjoy your vieos and I thank you so much
    . :D

  35. Dora says:

    This is the most perfect video I’ve seen so far. It is ridiculously simple that I’m practicing in my mind already with the guys I make eye contact and find chemistry with :)

  36. Laurie says:

    Want to learn more!

  37. Maradoll Mynx says:

    This is awesome. Great advice! Thanks Matt…have a great week :)

  38. Carol Grant says:

    I have heard that that type of beckoning can be misconstrued as an insult in some cultures. So then, what?

  39. Aggie Lau says:

    Hii Matt,

    This is great advice and really quite simple and risk free..I did sort of this tactics before but with a smile on my face and it works..The guy who was a stranger did walk over to me and I got to know him…

    This strategy does works..

  40. Susan says:

    Love it. So practical, step-by-step, do-able. It’s not half-way advice, but all the way actionable, with the opening line suggestion. Thank you.

  41. Angela says:

    JJ had the best content.

  42. Angela says:

    The frontal – side view – frontal…stick to the frontal. That wasn’t Jameson, was it?
    Otherwise, good content.

  43. Sasa says:

    But this would only work if you DO have some kind of chemistry in the first place. What if he never meet your glance? Clearly if he is not interested (by the way you look, let’s admit it) he won’t come over…

  44. JJ says:

    What bad can come of this is the woman is now in the pursuer role and the guy is in his feminine. Whoever speaks first is the man in the relationship. All the woman has to do is go to the ladies room and walk right by him. Don’t stop unless he stops you. If he does nothing on your way to the ladies room, give him 5 minutes to figure out what to do on your way back. It makes it easy for him to not cross the room but neither are you since you purpose of walking by him is to get somewhere else. You are just using the ladies room in his mind. I have done this hundreds of times and works like a charm. They will always stop you on your way back. Art first on your way towards him he thinks you are approaching him but then you throw him off by walking right by, with a smile of course. He thinks he missed his chance but then realizes you will have to walk by him again.

    Also you can leave your friends and go to the bar or coffee counter to get your own drink, closest to him. If he wants to meet you he will follow you there while you are alone. On your way to the bar just eye flirt with him then look away and go about getting your drink. As you wait look back with eye contact, smile and look away until he joins you.

    Don’t wave him over. It makes you look like your being aggressive and he will later wonder how many guys you do this with. Make it easy for him to approach you by positioning yourself. If a guy is waiting for you to make a move he is not much of a leader, Alpha male. He is more likely, a Mama’s Boy, Peter Pan looking for someone to take care of him and do all the work. The only way to find out what kind of guy you are getting is to see what he does or doesn’t do to get to know you. Men who don’t take action in the beginning are telling you either he has no confidence in himself, is used to someone else doing things for him, is afraid of rejection therefore is passive in getting what he really wants, and he wants you, the woman, to take the lead and be the man in the relationship.

    If he gives you his number and doesn’t ask for yours he wants you to be the man and pursue him. Sorry Matthew but some of your advice for women to make a first move, i.e. by gesturing or talking first is setting women up with men who are in the passive feminine role instead of masculine role. The only way to tell what kind of man you are interested is by his actions or lack of. And as women we tell men what kind of women we are by our lack of action or actions. Does she want to wear the pants or does she follow my lead as a truly feminine woman?

    As you described Matthew, If a woman is to wave a guy back to come to her instead, when he approaches her she should just smile and wait for the man to speak first.

    Be easy to get ladies but let the man do the getting.
    Note, I did not say be easy. Don’t sleep with him until you have a commitment contract.

    • Rosie says:

      You are brilliant JJ, exactly my thoughts

      • Angela says:

        JJ – bravo!

        • Susan says:

          You make some valid points JJ. Cheers. I liked hearing how the scenario played out. Does your point matter so much if once they’ve exchanged numbers she leaves the lead all up to him from there on in?

          • JJ says:

            It’s hard to leave the ball in his court once you started initiation. My point was that as women we wait to see what he does or doesn’t do to prove what kind of man he is, a mans man or a little boy letting mama take care of things. It’s a way of quickly finding out if you will be waisting your time down the road with a man who is always letting you move the relationship and other things forward. His lack of initiation also tells you he is not a go getter since he waits for things to come to him instead of overcoming his fears and insecurities and pursuing what he wants. You’ll never know if a guy really wants you by making yourself something that is just convenient for him rather than being a woman he can’t live without.

            If you do make the mistake of speaking or pursuing first, let that be a jump start and then just stop all other actions and see what he does. No calls, no texts, no dropping by his work place. If he does nothing he is either a little boy or he is not that interested enough to pursue. Give a guy 8-10 weeks to process you then move on if you have not heard from him. Sometimes they are getting out of an old relationship or need time to appreciate you compared to the other superficial or bossy women etc, they are currently dating only to realize you could be a better option for him. Whatever the reason, men often need time to mull a new woman over before he starts chasing you. But if you call or text him first you interrupt this process for him. You may want to call to show him how great of a catch you are but really the less he knows about you in the beginning the better. Keep him wanting more. Let his fantasies about you drive him in your direction. Keep the mystery because we can often talk too much in the begining and talk him right out of liking us. Keep conversation light, fun, playful to keep him in his feeling attraction mode rather than getting all intellectual with him and putting him in his thinking man to man mode. Don’t lead the conversation. Be voice activated, mostly let him lead the conversation. Let him work at getting to know you. This will also tell by the kind of topics and questions he talks about with you, what it is about you that he is interested in, you or just your body. Does he truly want to get to know you or is he making small talk until he can get in your pants? ….

            All of this letting a man do the pursuing in not just about being a lady but to inform you who this man really is and what does he really want with you. If women take the lead role, they will never know. If you take the lead pursuing role and a guy rejects you it is most likely he is a real man who won’t let a woman lead him. He will look for a woman who will respect his ability and wanting to lead while she gladly is receptive to his advances in getting to know her.

      • JJ says:

        Thanks. I’ve had a lot of practice :)

        • kish says:

          JJ that was BRILLIANT. You have surpassed the Hussey brothers here and you can start your own blog about dating.

          I think Matt and Steve are really good at showing us how to
          (i) develop social skills in general
          (ii) build self-esteem and grow as a person
          (iii) build an independent and interesting life

          But I often disagree with Matt’s view that women can initiate conversation and interactions and other little things and that doesn’t make them unfeminine. But you see it doesn’t work that way like you said. The smallest initiation can set the dynamic of a relationship that can be hard to change later on leaving both people frustrated if they truly are their respective masculine and feminine selves.

          That is where I think you are 100% right. Be easy to get (not easy) but let the man do the getting RIGHT FROM THE START. Although Matt argues that many guys are shy and have approach anxiety and we are most likely to be hit by players if we always rely on the guy to approach, the thing is that the pursuer-prize dynamic gets established very early and if we start conversations and calling etc.even if we don’t escalate to asking out–we risk ending up with someone who is more beta/feminine or lazy or immature. And guys tend to follow if you’re the one starting the conversation and seem to believe that you LIKE wearing the pants. And that sucks.

          I personally hate making the first move at all..including starting conversations so this works for me since I am pretty passive socially. I am more comfortable with making myself more approachable by smiling and generally being receptive and positioning myself.

          The advice given here by Matt can really backfire and make you look silly if the guy ignores your handwaving. It isn’t very feminine either and I don’t particularly like it.

    • Rileigh says:

      Personally, I like to be the person who moves first. Not everyone agrees with the stereotype of “the guy has to make the first move”. just my opinion. But yours is your opinion too. :)

      • JJ says:

        I respect your choice Rileigh but I have a question… Do you like to pursue guys because you are impatient or want to be in control?… If you are impatient then you really want a man to pursue you but you don’t like the passivity of waiting, which for most women is frustrating being on his time rather than your time.

        But if you like to pursue because you want to be in control of him then go for it. It says you want men who are followers rather than leaders. There is nothing wrong with women who want to be in control and respected for their actions and thoughts and that also means you are giving up having your feelings cherished by a man in order to be respected for taking control.

        I write this to you because many woman think they want to pursue and like to pursue men but in reality would like a guy to come after & chase them instead. Its just the impatience of waiting for him and being on his time frame that can suck. But when women chase a man we give up a lot. Being cherished is one thing we give up. WHen a man lets us chase him, we are cherishing him i.e. putting his feelings first above ours. We become the givers and receive little back, especially from little mama’s boys. It is less romantic since we are in the pursuer mode, we don’t get the little sweet surprises, gifts or protection from a man since we are the chasers we become the givers and protectors instead of him.
        Often men who allow women to do all the work will not be the guy to step up and protect us when we are in a situation where we are threatened, physically, emotionally or any other way. They let the woman fend for herself. To me that is not a turn on and a romance killer.
        I am willing to sacrifice a little control to get where a man is a man and a woman is a woman and I am swept off my feet, well protected and my feelings are cherished. My man will do whatever it takes to make me feel good rather than dating a little boy who cares more about his own feelings than mine. A real man gives, protects, nurtures and cherishes. I want that in trade for letting him take the reigns of the relationship otherwise it ends up to be a roomate situation equal- equal or it ends up I am doing all the work and the other is doing nothing.

        Just something to think about. I was there a long time ago and it is much better letting a man think he is in control. As Matthew says, it is really a clever woman who can let a man think it is his idea when its really hers. The best of both world IMO.

        Best of luck to you in finding your true love!

    • JJ says:

      Yes that is correct also. Either a guy wants you to pursue him or he has no intention of calling, a brush off. If a guy really wants a date with a woman, he will not let the possibility of never seeing her again happen by not getting her number before she leaves.

      • kish says:

        JJ, many guys WILL take your number and never call (and it is NOT because they lost it) so that in itself doesn’t mean much.

        However, my pet peeve is when a guy gives me HIS number and asks me to call him. Another version is–hey, feel free to add me on Facebook. Or, come by my office sometime. I find this really frustrating because seriously, if HE is interested in ME then HE should pursue and get me interested, right? Why can’t HE call, ADD me on Facebook himself and come by MY office? Are these things very difficult to do? Why would he assume that I am already interested when he hasn’t made ANY effort to get me interested?

        Sometimes this can even happen on a date where the guys asks you out but then leaves it to you to decide everything else–where do you want to eat, which movie should we see? I mean, HE’s the one taking me out so what happened to HIS plans?

        The second annoying thing about this is the implicit “order”..that I should do the work if this is going to happen. Like handing someone your luggage so that they can lug it for you.

        The third is that it sounds so feminine–like–look at me, I’m so cute, all the girls chase me and you should too!

        The funny thing is many guys have done this to me who aren’t even all that good looking or attractive. Sometimes I believe a lot of guys do this because they are insecure and don’t want to take risks so they want to put the burden on the woman. That is understandable because men get rejected a lot. But what they don’t understand is that men will have to be the pursuers because women invest more in a relationship (esp. biologically) and carry other risks which men don’t appreciate. So it is only fair to let them take the risk of initial pursuit.

        My standard response to such guys is always a smile and then NOTHING. I never call, go to their office or add them on Facebook or make any effort whatsoever and I’m always happy to lose them because this turns me off so much, that even if the guy reverses his stance I’m not ok with it.

        As for guys who DO ask for my number (very few), I tend to not expect them to call and that way I don’t get disappointed. Some will call and follow through though and the good thing is that they are at least making a sincere effort even if the relationship doesn’t work out.

      • kish says:

        Oh also, JJ, I have often had guys invite me to parties,events or places where they will be performing/showcasing their talent (if he’s a musician), or some kind of group outing.

        Now I understand this is NOT a date and I’m fine with going to events if they really interest me. I just see these events a possibility to meet new people and have fun regardless of what happens with the guy.

        But is this behavior also beta/feminine?

        How do I know this it is a pre-cursor to a date–because maybe he wants to get to know me in a non-pressure group setting first?

        Should I go to these events if I sense there is some underlying attraction from his side, even if I’m not thrilled about the event? The problem is that I don’t want him to think I don’t like him by saying no.

        What if he keeps inviting me to more and more group events but never makes a date? He isn’t exactly friend-zoning me because there is no sex without a relationship or friend like behavior form my side. And there is no firm gf/romantic interest on his end of things and there is some mild flirtation going on between the two of us only.

        But this often seems like he is keeping me around or screening me and watching how I fit into his life without actually INVESTING in me and I don’t like it.

        You mentioned give guys 8-10 weeks to get their head around a woman. Why? That is too much! I personally get put off if a guy takes that long. I’m not saying he should commit to me by the 3rd date but if he is just “checking me out” for 2 -3 months while also “checking out” 10 other girls, then it shows me that he’s either very indecisive or I’m not that attractive to him or he just wants to have fun, not serious etc.
        I’m ok if a guy is initially interested in a few girls (not EVERY girl) but then he better zero in on me after some time if he really likes me. He can take his time to seal the relationship deal but he cannot pursue other women simultaneously for 3 months!

        So how do I handle a guy who won’t make an explicit date. This seems to be happening a lot nowadays. Meeting up and hang outs have replaced traditional dates–but I crave traditional courtship so much! Please advise.

  45. Anita D says:

    Bonjour Matthew,

    I love this one! It’s really genuine and so cute :) I will try it for sure !

    Have a wonderful Sunday ! :)

  46. Shakita says:

    Could you address about interracial dating as far as wondering if a white guy would be interested in a black woman. Are there any different tips or the same tips you give.

    • JJ says:

      Shakita, Attraction is attraction. If he is not into inter-racial relationships he won’t show any interest just as if he wouldn’t show interest in blondes if he is not into blondes or if he wants a Christian woman and meets a Jewish girl he will not have interest. Its all a numbers game. I always have trusted God to remove men from my experience that are not right for me. When I look back on the men I thought I wanted that didn’t work out, I always see it was a blessing or I see them a year or so later and say to myself “What the hell was I thinking wanting that guy?!! Thank God it didn’t work out!” LOL

      Hope you find what you are looking for.

  47. Jingjing says:

    You are So funny Matthew Hussey! I was laughing so hard the whole time watching this..Had to leave a comment to let you know. Thank you for that!! :D

  48. Venus says:

    Loved the Posts as usual!!

    Can the camera please keep still when Matt’s filming!
    Be nice to concentrate on the message, not the scenery, and his nice cheek bone structure from all angles.
    It’s distracting and been happening a bit..
    Love You Guys
    *just putting it out there
    Great job Jamieson (Jamela) Lv u Matt xx

    • JJ says:

      I agree this new camera angle thing was distracting especially with the mirrors.i felt a disconnect from it but I am sure they were just trying something new to be more artsy fartsy.

  49. Feebee says:

    Ive never had looks like that with a stranger. I’m normally too shy to continue looking for long because it can turn into staring :/

    • JJ says:

      I Know what you are talking about weird staring. At the supermarket last week some guy was staring at me for like 60 seconds straight with no smile. I thought he wanted to abduct and kill me. It was so creepy! LOL…

      “Eye contact is what sets souls on fire!” It has to be done right though.

      Do only 6 or 7 seconds of staring at a time otherwise it gets creepy. Make sure to smile or smirk sexily at second #4 then look away to friends or your cell phone if alone etc.. Then wait 4 seconds then look back for 2 seconds with a sexy smirk then look away again and wait until you feel its right to look back again. Make sure you are positioned so you can see him if he is looking at you while your not looking so you’ll know when to look back for 6 or 7 seconds again. Then you’ve got him. Watch that movie MY GEISHA about learning how to drop a man with one look. Its awesome and really works! Practice on men everywhere until it becomes natural to you.

  50. Della Chow says:

    Matt. You are hot! How far you have come in your style and confidence in the last 3 years. I just wanted to say hi…hehe

    Vancouver, BC

  51. Maria_Canada says:

    Matthew – yes, this works ladies because I’ve done it…LOL. I tried this technique; the hot guy came over, smiled and was so nice and we chatted for a bit. I just wanted to meet him. I don’t know what made me wave him over because it’s a bold gesture but I think because I didn’t fester in the thought of doing it, I just seized the moment. Carpe diem!


Read previous post:
Starting Over After Heartbreak

In this week's episode of LOVELife, I take a call from Christina, who just got out of a long term...