How To Get A Guy To Like You: Learn these 2 simple words…

You wouldn’t believe how many women read every blog, watch every YouTube video, and follow every Facebook post I put out, and yet still say:

“Yeah, Matt… I get it. But there’s this one guy that I really like…”

And because they’re so head-over-heels for this man, all of the advice goes out of the window.

In this week’s video, I’m about to reveal 2 simple words that will tell you everything you need to know about men and how to get the love you really deserve…



61 Responses to How To Get A Guy To Like You: Learn these 2 simple words…

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  1. Marry Johnsan says:

    Hi, these tips and questions are very good to approach my crush. Thanks for sharing these tips. Keep Updating.

  2. Joy says:

    Wow, you always amaze me with your teachings, i love it so much When you make us understand more about guys. Thank you Matthew..

  3. Nancy says:

    Matt, I’ve been following you for about 6 months now, and I’ve never left a comment before. I just have to say I really appreciate your passion for people – you are the real-deal, and I can be cynical and skeptical, which is why I’ve watched you for 6 months! Thank you for your genuineness, your sincerity, your words of wisdom, your no-nonsense approach/yet you deliver it with such tenderness. I truly am grateful to you!

  4. Karen says:

    Matt, I love this idea so much. Why? Because what you are really asking me to do here is ASLO question myself: when I am in people pleasing mode am I just seeking TV and Candy (the quick validation of the guy liking me, trying to get to the next step on boyfriend quest etc) or am I willing have to say no to myself and to my TV and Candy cravings so that I can truly enjoy myself by holding true to what it is I ACTUALLY need which is mutual respect and a connection based on honesty and reality. Not just a fantasy situation I’ve constructed to keep me in denial of the “relationship” dynamics I’m a part of. With this I can have a clear perspective of who the person is that I’m interested in, what their investment level is, their values and goals AND it helps me form an honest relationship with someone because let’s face it, if I’m doing things I wouldn’t normally do to get you to like me, I’m not actually myself. I’m a version that I think you want. So when things crash and burn or just fizzle, I might be sad but the reality is, I never gave you a chance to get to know me so things were doomed from the start because I didn’t show up for myself first and give you the respect you deserved to see me for who I am. Thanks again, love the phrase, because really who doesn’t love a phrase with the word Candy in it? ;) Love your videos and books, you’ve helped me resist the urge to overinvest many times and just be an overall smarter dater. You, Jameson, and your brother are quite the team! ❤️

  5. Jazmin says:

    Hi….. a friend and i got closer very quickly after my break up…. intially i just wanted to have fun, i mean I did just get out of a long term relationship … he knew that but we got carried away. Now i have fallen for him… and he explains that he now wants to take it slow and he has so many goals to reach in his carreer that if he continues at the pace we had going, his career will suffer. I understood and took to your videos for help. Now its just complacent….i am trying to give him space. And he seems to be pulling away. I dont know what to do. I dont want to overthink but he seems too quiet. Did i loose him??

  6. Liz says:

    Makes so much sense!! Thanks Matt :)

  7. Sue says:

    You’ve outdone yourself this week Matt!! This is the most I’ve rewind a video! I wanted to make sure I “got” every single point/thought! Thank you!! A must-watch video, minimum twice!

  8. Ashley says:

    Being a high value woman is exhausting. I want TV and candy too. How do I navigate someone else’s want vs need when I can barely get a handle on it myself?

  9. says:

    Very interesting, respect over like for building long term attraction.
    Men crave respect in relationship with a woman.
    When it comes to a relationship with a man,
    give yourself the chance to feel respect for him and give him a chance to be the Man.
    Unless of course, he is completely useless as a man in a relationship.
    Some men just like to walk through life getting easy sex and not caring about anyone. And they like to just check you out and they have no idea that human beings have feelings; and that all have a soul.
    These men are probably not worth your time.

  10. Diana says:

    Thank you so much for making videos like these, Matthew. I have listened and watched you for over 3 years now. Funny thing is, I’ve been married for over 4. The truth is, even when you’re married, you never stop dating whether you realize it or not. You’ve changed and improved my life for the better in so many ways you have no idea… From the bottom of my heart. Thank you.

  11. Stéphanie Wilbur says:

    EXCELLENT. It’s about buillding trust and respect and the kind of relationship that will take you both higher…

  12. n2 says:

    Thank you for this, Matt! It validates how I have been approaching a situation with a guy I’ve known for a little over three weeks. He wants “TV and Candy”, and I am letting him know I’m flattered, but not ready to jump into a physical relationship. Thank you for reminding us that there are many men to choose from in the sea, and we can ask for what we want and don’t always have to acquiesce to a man’s request!

  13. Dana says:

    Hmm… seems like i should really usecthis advice in my cuttent situation. I just don’t know how.
    I fell in love with a man who showed me that all he wants is a booty call(my fault, I know).
    Even if I knew that this is only what he wants but not what he needs, how can I use this information?
    I can sit here, waiting for days until he calls. And when he calls, my only choice will be to give him TV and candy or to lose him completely. Nothing more, right?

  14. Mammy bella says:

    Hi there . I need advice my fiance before he start work he was call me evry day,day and night but now he work to the other country, he is not contact me like he use too, many time am the one who ccontact him ,and if (I ask why you are so silence he said bcs I work hard and think about our future and he always said he is trying to but him self together and find the way we can be close forever )i do understand that he need and I do too but am asking my self why he is not show up like before why not calls evry day. And I ask him again do you really feel me in to you he reply to yes he do very much and he want me to he is life but he is silence is really that my problem now is almost 7 months he is like that but evry 2day or 3days he send text me to check how am doing and end up with (i love you so much ) buy my self he is slince make me confused I feel like he changed but when he show up again look the seem I don’t I will like if you can help me to understand ( bcs my self tell if he is not in to me any more he is family and friends they should stop to contact me often but the still close to even if my fiance he didn’t call me them the do. Am not understand now if I will keep waiting him and give him time or if I will keep question him about how he feel for us. Please I will like to hear form here what I can do .

  15. Petra says:

    I did what you said in another Post Math. I explain him my standars, I think a Little bit late and I pass from sex zone to, Work zone and now he doe`snt answer my massages, I did some things wrong like tell him to trust in me and then when he trust to much and ask for money, cause he have economic issues, obviusly I say No, cause I do`nt think a person that it`s not treating me the way i Should be treated, deserves my Economic Help and more if I do`nt have enought money to cover my own needs. If he is my Husband of course I will help him, but he is not my boyfriend, a lot of people take money frome me before so I do`nt trust, my problem is that I just trust in GOD, cause the humans are always imperfects like me…

    It`s kind of hard breaking, another deseption, today was his birthday, he did`nt answer my call and he did`nt write me back. I really like him and he is a great guy, but what he offer me it`s not enought, I understand after he explain me why he work that much, but he still go out and he never invites me, me neither, I did`nt what to introduce him until was something siruis cause I have to much kids in my family and they ask thinks and it`s unconfortable.

    I was in love with another guy 15 years ago and his memory still stucking me, it`s so bad this Crush, it`s really noscive, he was the second guy that told me did`nt like me and 4 me was so bad, but well year later I saw him again and now him better and I realice he was not the great guy I thought, he is just a breastfeeding baby.

    I don`nt want more Drama in my Love Life. I really want to settle down.

  16. Laura says:

    How do I stop being a people pleaser?

  17. Li says:

    Hi Matthew, Li here from San Diego! You met me before. Just wanted to say thank you, thank you, and thank you! Love your London entrepreneur speech a few years ago and love love that I re-connected to you via watching your videos, articles and hearing your message!! Thank you!! I needed this. Thank you! Xie Xie

  18. Lisa L LeVasseur says:

    How do I get the man I’ve been involved with for 4 years to be interested & romantic again?
    He had to move a 1000 miles away for work 2 years. And I go see him every 6 months now. He kind of a loaner in the first place, but about 6 months after he went to Michigan to work he got very sad said he wouldn’t make a good boyfriend right now, and stopped texting or and my calls. But when I go up everything is as we never left each other. Anf I don’t push for answers, but the past couple times he’s seemed distant and sad, uninterested. He’s been living in his van going from job to job. I love this man unconditional. And wish he’d just come back home, off ask me to move there. But I don’t know how to get though to him anymore. We were so happy & in love before he left Florida. But he’s suborn but I now he cares or he wouldn’t be there at all. Please help..i don’t know what else to do to show this man I care about him and his well being. But I’m losing hope. I do love him, but I don’t know how to reach his heart.
    Please Help! Lisa

  19. K says:

    Matt – you hit it out of the park with this one. This is exactly what I needed to hear today. Cheers!

  20. Fran says:

    Wow this video is so powerful and really helped to re enforce my thinking. Your advice is priceless.

  21. Kerri says:

    I agree respect is more important than like, for sure. I do get exasperated though that there is much more information aimed at women to figure out what a guy wants/needs, and not towards men to figure out what a woman needs. Sure, we’re socialized as women to overfunction when it comes to the emotional and communication stuff, and I feel dating advice continues that socialization. But it can be confusing sometimes….it’s driven into our heads to not be overly needy and obsessive and analytical when it comes to figuring out men, but often advice is focused very much on that…on women trying to strategize and figure out what men need vs. what they want, as part of a strategy to connect with them.

  22. Judit says:

    That was a fantastic advice. It helps me to see my past, present and my future from a very different perspective.
    Thank you Matt!

  23. Ella says:

    Hi there.

    I have one simple question for you that is a bit different then those you get on daily bases.

    How to know when to stop flirting?

    You are focused mostly on woman who want to get a guy, but what about girls who flirt on daily bases because it is fun?

    I flirt with my dentist to have batter care, with hot nurse man while I was lying in hospital bad, with assistant at university for some extra points, with bartender to get batter drink, or you know wherever I find hot guy, because I guess I feel bored with how easy they give me what I want.

    Almost always, I don’t want anything at all, I’m just doing it for fun and hoping to find someone who will know how to play the game instead of taking the bite almost immediately.

    btw. I love this video, it made me realize that in every relationship, I was kid with TV and candy and I should probably change that.

  24. Erika says:

    I agree 100% with you. Since I follow your advices, my love life is better. I met someone that I’m keeping and doing my best to not lose.

    Last night he knew I was upset with him and I left my phone turned off in my bag. Away from me. I went dancing with friends. He knew where I was and he showed up there just to see me.

    I will always try to not adapt myself for anyone. I don’t want to lose my self respect and I know that there are billions of people in the world…

  25. Tinka says:

    Good advice as usual

  26. Syd says:

    Sex is not a dirty act. It is love.

    Fucking is love too.

    Just don’t do it with the wrong person.

    Oxytocin. Matthew we shalst care when we have “sex” with a person. My friend taught me well.

  27. Lynda says:

    Excellent metaphor, keep up the great work!

  28. Syd says:

    Of course the video is about sex.

    It is ALL interconnected, dumbass.

  29. asal says:

    good video matt
    but I can 100% bet you “some guys only look for TV and candy”
    I had a boyfriend.he never wanted to be with me.he wasn’t monogamous

    after a few month he left me looking for TV and candy in other girls(my religion didn’t allow me to give him TV and candy before marriage)

    and his friend told me : he wants TV and candy.if you wait, he’ll marry you in future

    but he doesn’t want to be with you right now(he doesn’t like you to see him with other girls until marriage)

    answer me matthew or anybody please.what do you think about these kind of men.he loved me but he was not least until age of 30 or 40.that’s very sad

    • Syd says:

      His friend sounds like an amazing person. Count your blessings and use sex to bond with the right man. Meantime, TV and candy with any man until your figure him out but don’t give him any candy. Just watch.

      Observation is always good prior to approaching the bench.

      • Syd says:

        Don’t give up anything really delicious to a guy that you may regret in 30 years time… Like a career, your heart, your happiness, your virginity. And kissing is dangerous. That’s why most kids do it in middle school or make out in high school. It’s like a game for them. At 29 or 30, with the ticking biological clock, attraction is insane. It is best to respect the clock and have a healthy fear of oxytocin bonding with the wrong man.

        Who is the wrong man? It’s the man who impresses you and has won you over with his love and flirtation and advances but he may be demonstrating in his personal life that his character is not up to par. :( it’s always sad and disappointing when that happens but you have to do the right thing. Always.

        Do a right thing. :)

        Have a happy Sunday everyone :-)

  30. sawsan says:

    Thank you so much, you made me feel better I really loved it

  31. GINA ^.^ says:

    This VIDEO is Exactly how I Feel and I Am this way, woman have to put their standards of “RESPECT” you first. even if the moment is right.
    •A quickie will bring you short term Relationship.
    •A T.V & Candy will prolong the Relationship YOU always wanted. “WHY” because YOU don’t give in right away, & because WE can’t get enough of T.V & especially CANDY, Again, Thank You,
    Matthew Hussey for Your Inspiration.

  32. Anna says:

    You are actually suprisingly special. Though I don’t believe that people can internalize even the greatest advice before it gets crystallized and deeply understood by themselves, but I do enjoy your sparking mind, your sensitivity, helpfulness and the morals and values you are up to. Not the typical western guy with ‘modern’ mentality. Luck up! Cheers from Hungary!

  33. Lucie Marcela says:

    WOW Matthew! You really pinpointed the issue. With this key point, what the man (truly) needs, everything else comes naturally: a confident partner, and with this respect, longing, genuine happiness, love on a deeper level.

    Keep up the good work ;) You are giving love a second chance <3

  34. Destiny says:


  35. Gale says:

    Matthew Hussey, YOU ARE BRILLIANT. I so look forward to these Sunday mornings with you. I really do feel closer to meeting ‘MY MAN’ with the awesome advice that you so generously give to us. I Love you and I know every woman, watching you, does. Even the ones who lash out at you. I know, you ‘hit a nerve’ with them. Even if they don’t know it. I can’t wait to write to you that I finally met ‘MY MAN’. I feel I am getting so close to that day. Thank you!!!!

  36. Mia says:

    “Respect is, ‘I don’t just like you, I want to BE like you.'”
    Preach! lol very on point with this message, about people pleasing, and hearing what someone (anyone really) wants in the moment versus knowing what they/we need for long-term relational health. And of course with romance most of us smh, just get struck dumb and blind.
    But you don’t lie! Love it. Amen, brother, keep it coming.

  37. M says:

    Wow! That was so insightful.

  38. Peterpansgirl says:

    Hello Matthew

    Such a great video. So true!
    Because of you. I know Im not tv and candy in my relationship. Because of you helping me set a tone for us early on. He tells me everytime he sees me just how lucky he is to have me in his life and how he cant wait to see me.(over a year and a half now.) He talks of a future with me and means it. Meeting his family and his children from previous marriage. Thank you for helping us distingish tv and candy.

    Thank you!!

  39. Julie MacKenzie says:

    I love this video! Thanks Matthew! Certainly a different angle to look at it…Hugs! Looking forward to the next video….;) <3

  40. Thanh Phan says:

    I wanna to learn how I get a guy who I love ❤️

  41. Lauren says:

    The concept is spot on. I like to say are you liver or steak? Liver (like/ short term gratification/ fills you but doesn’t satiate) or steak (respect/ long term quality/ fills you and satisfies)

  42. Wendy says:

    Fantastic advice, Matthew! Well said, I think. I love when you delve into psychological aspect of a man’s psyche.

  43. kobbs says:

    Great video. Thanks for helping to raise the bar in relationships – both for men and for women.

  44. A. says:

    Ah, Matthew. So true, so true.

    Sometimes *I’m* the one who wants the TV and candy. I’ll be straight up. And he knows that. So a lot of it is reigning in my own excitement. (Not talking about sex, btw, but just the excitement of meeting a great person.)

    It’s been interesting with this latest guy. I’ll let you know how it goes. :-)

    • Syd says:

      I hope to feel like that about someone, someday but I can’t allow myself to love anyone who conflicts with my goals

  45. Betty Taylor says:

    Been glued to youtube watching Matts videos and boy do they work. Not only have I got my new (since feb) long distance boyfriend eating out the palm of my hand, texting me loads when he had started to miss days messaging me (by either send one good morning text a day and nothing more, or not texting him at all for a day) but I had two other men from a dating website begging me to meet them. Ok i turned the other two down but just by using the copy and paste scripts they were hooked. I just decided neither were right for me.

    The advice Matt gives is amazing!

  46. Marita says:

    Oh this is really so true! I see now the name of the game with a guy i’m dating. Thank you Matt!

  47. Stefania says:

    Matthew, this is one or your best. Deep ,inspiring, meaningful, openminded, empowering. Congrats.

  48. Ijeoma Okere says:

    Absolutely great video,Matt!Eye-opening and very well explained.Thank you for that!

  49. Cindy says:

    I like the message as it leaves is something to think about. However, I can answer the question but it leaves me with more questions such as how I am I suppose to make sure I still give the person I’m with what he wants and still meet the what he needs. For example you brought up sex – well if I think that is all he wants and one holds back knowing you want to be what he needs not just what he wants. I hope I made sense. Looking forward to hearing more to peel the onion back

    • Emma says:

      Hi Cindy!

      I am not matt for sure but I think I get what you meant. When I started watching Matt’s videos I felt kind of the same : “how can I get that guy to want more and all”. Last year, I met someone who said straight away they didn’t want to be in a relationship. I had just got out of a 6 years relationship myself, so a one night thing sounded great because I didn’t want anything serious either. Thing is, he then called me back saying he wanted to see me again. I had never ever done casual dating before (I am french maybe that’s why ;) ) but thought why not ! Anyways we ended up being stuck in a relationship limbo where he would text me almost everyday to talk about his day and life, asking me for advise and what not, we would meet twice a week talk so much that I got to know him but it was not a real relationship either… I didn’t know this blog at the time but I could feel I was starting to like that guy, but that something was weired… So I asked him what he wanted and if he had change his mind? He said that he liked me a lot but he couldn’t commit right now. So I walked away. I told him I understood but since I was starting to like him and wanted to get to know him better I would rather stop seeing him since we were not on the same page anymore. I told him it had been great and wished him the best. This was in 2016. A month ago I found matthew’s video and it got me thinking about that guy again and wondering where did I went wrong, what could I have done to keep him. It now downs on me that what I did was just right, because the difficulty of this genius concept of Matt is that it also implies to “lose” that guy we like sooo much and be strong enough that we are worth more and that we can meet someone who will love us and respect us as much as we love and respect them. And it is sooo hard to give up and walk away. I stayed with this guy 5 months before I walked away, and if I am being honest a part of me still is damn he was great, but that’s where I am like, Emma you never really got to know that guy so you like the idea of him more than you can say you like him. I keep on dating, I reject people, I get rejected, it’s part of life, it’s not easy but the bottom line is, this guy you are seeing, I don’t know how long it’s been, or anything but if you feel you are in the limbo I will really encourage you to confront him but if you do you also need to be ready to walk way, which is the hard part, and @Matthew, correct me if I am wrong, but I feel that this is the essens of your message, be prepared to walk away, because this is the only way to respect your self and put your self first :) and obviously meet someone better suited for you in the long run. I swear to you it is better in the long run :) And obviously I am not saying it is a game based on tricks and all I sooo don’t believe in strategies and all that bullshit it really just is about respecting yourself and to not accept things when you think this is not ok for you. This is really personnal, it’s listening to yourself and never be afraid to speak to the other person about how you want things to be, but then be sure to respect yourself and if needed walk away. If he comes back then you know the guy really likes you if he doesn’t it’s not the guy for you :) I hope my (very long, sorry) message can help you or guide you in a way. I only have very little context on your story so I don’t know but I am a girl’s girl so I am all about empowering women and being supportive to one another so be assured that this comes from a place of love :) I hope you will get your guy :) Take Care Emma

      • Mia says:

        I second Cindy’s question, but have to say: right on Emma! We mustn’t lose our common sense or self-respect or fail to practice the sound advice we would give a friend. So I wanted to thank you Emma for sharing your personal story, one with a PROPER happy ending lol. But seriously, I applaud you for sticking to your standards and leaving available for a different, better man that space he was taking up (reaping the emotional and sexual rewards of a relationship sounds like, without having to deal with any of the true work required for a functional happy one).
        well. that was wordy, but really, just thanks! I loved what you wrote, in reply to an important question many of us deal with frequently.
        “I’m with HER.” ;)

        • Syd says:


          Close the tap, ladies. Make sure he can pay the tab. And that means commitment and being YOUR man.

          If not, then he’s a fuck boy. :( and so many of them trade intimacy for sex. Sleep with their young vulnerable direct reports at work. And the idiots think they are so powerful for having traded self respect to get ahead in their “career” or outsmarted the wife who is boss, she is queen.

          Sorry to vent

          • Syd says:

            I have a meeting with this moron on Monday I dread I dread I dread

            Abuse of power is sick.

            And that is what a man does when he has you by your emotional balls.

            Make sure he’s your man.

            This is strike three at work of the married men pretending to be single program. I fall too quickly and I don’t gather enough evidence. I am going to make this a great leaning opportunity/lesson for kicking ass Part 3

            Part 1 – he loved me and I guilt tripped him. Oops
            Part 2 – I went to HR and gave him a GOOD scare
            Part 3 – ? TBD


            Stay angry and thirsty but don’t leave hungry.

      • Claudia says:

        Those words are exactly what I need right now!! Wish I could be that strong to walk away from something that seems to grow but only for me…. thanks I get it: let him go is a selfrespect issue

      • Renee says:

        You don’t know how much you have helped me Emma! Re- affirming I need to have self respect be does not want to be committed now but in the future, and I am okay with that I need to walk away

  50. Mariani says:

    You are always amazing. This video really open my eyes and my mind. Thank you very much Matthew. I really appreciate you and your hard work to help women around the world.

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