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Insights from the male mind (Today Show feature)

Yesterday I was back on The Today Show. They are calling my segment “The Other View” – ha!

I wanted to post the video here on the blog as it has some important lessons. Hope you enjoy!

It looks like I might be doing a more regular slot so I’ll be able to bring you more of these as we go.


 
Here are the big takeaways from the show…

1) How to show someone they are appreciated (outside of the bedroom)

It’s the little things that count here.

Women get paid compliments a lot more than guys, and it’s easy to forget the impact that telling a guy he’s handsome can have.

When you get back from work, give him a huge hug and tell him how much you’ve missed him (note: this is NOT ‘needy’. Needy would be getting home and asking, ‘did you miss me?’.)

Make him feel like a man. Ask him to teach you something, be curious, back him up where appropriate around other people. Loyalty is key to a relationship!

2) How to get him to call or text more (without asking

You have to tell someone what your formula is for feeling loved, as we all have different rules.

Kathie Lee had a great line, “don’t expect something if you’ve not made it known that it’s something that you need”.

While your standard might be to hear from him 4 times a week, his might be just once, and so you need to make him aware of what you expect and communicate your rules to him.

Doing so can be as simple as saying, “This is how I feel loved. I know it’s different to how you feel loved, but it’s important to me.”

3) I had a baby three months ago. I don’t feel sexy at all. How do I explain to him that I’m not there mentally?

Start by accepting that he’s still a man, and that he has the same needs and desires that he did before you ever got pregnant.

You have the ability to still feel attractive and turned on, even if it doesn’t feel as natural right now. Help him understand what he can do to make you feel that way. Remember the dynamic of the relationship hasn’t shifted and that he still wants to be the hero.

Question of the day: What does a guy have to do to make you feel loved? Let me know in the comments below!

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101 Replies to “Insights from the male mind (Today Show feature)”

  • Good to see you walking the talk Mr Hussey. Sitting side on, flashing a disarming smile and going for the knee touch. It definitely had the effect, they were positively gushing…
    Just a woman’s point of view, but it is difficult after having a baby if intimacy in the relationship has always led up to full on sex. It’s like the non touching in the beginning to physicality going from 0 to sixty. Sometimes we might be too tired, but rather than re- buff or reject, if there has been touching, cuddling, hugs all along its easier to keep feeling close. And doing constant little things to show you care. I think if its right this will occur naturally.
    Deep friendship and passionate lust is what we want. The books attraction formula is right? Can you make chemistry happen?
    You’re always brilliant and very handsome ; ) x

  • Hey Matt,

    I am happy to see you doing so well. I’ve been following you for a while and have notice you practice what you preach on all of us no wonder you are so loved by so many (myself including).
    God bless you and this brilliant gift you are sharing…x
    Keep it coming :)

  • I loved this so much! I watched the last segment about lactating like fifteen times now.
    You know you’re job and you know how to have fun on it.
    All the best love.

  • Matt!
    This interview was hilarious. You need to be added on as a new host! Haha. I have a question- I’ve been “seeing” my neighbor for the past month or so and we both seem to really like each other, and I want to take things to the next level, but he hasn’t brought up the relationship talk at all, and I’m not sure if he even will. We’re both 21, and I’ve never been in a relationship before, hate to say it. He’s kind of the shy type and so am I. I really love spending time with him and want him to know how much I like him without scaring him off, or before he finds someone else. We met a year ago and only recently has anything been happening. Do you think I should say something to him the next time we meet?

    Also, do you think it’s okay for the girl to be asking the guy to hang out a lot, or should it be vice versa? Or 50/50?

  • Matt the world is a much better place with you in it, you make a difference , you are lovely XO

    ” In everyone’s life ,at sometime, our inner fire goes out. It is then burst into flame by an encounter with another human being.
    We should all be thankful for those people who rekindle the inner spirit ” (Albert Schweitzer)

    Thank you XXOO

  • Funny interview and interesting question. I also think that the little things count. So I guess I feel loved, when a guy tells me I look beautiful or when he takes interest in what I feel/think or do or when he just randomly comes up to me and asks me about my day. Those are the things that actually show me that he cares. :)

    1. P.S.: The last time you told me I was a winner, while I was going through a trough. Now I actaually feel that way. Something at work finally worked out amazingly, even though I was afraid that it wouldn’t. :D I see you’re doing great too. Keep on going! You’re definitely a winner! :)

  • What do you think of a 54 year old man who has been divorced for 20 years and has never been in a committed relationship because he hasnt found the “woman he cant live without”. He goes back and forth between saying he is fine single to saying he Would like to marry someday. He even says he made a mistake in letting one slip through his fingers because now he realized he DID love her….but he never called her his girlfriend. She moved on. Is he emotionaly unavailable?

  • ☆♥♥:)Dear Matthew:)♥♥☆

    Matthew Hussey is back again :)
    Awwwwwwwwwwwwwww ♥&♥ yaaaaaaaaaaaaaaay :)

    A truly warm-hearted ♥&♥ incredibly handsome hero YOU are :)

    I really really really love your question :)
    Here is the answer:

    I feel loved when a guy ♥&♥ me kiss each others hearts :) ♥&♥ if that is possible I believe all the best will happen :)

    How about YOU Matthew Hussey? Hope YOU always always always feel loved :)

    ☀☆☀ :) Always always always all the best for the very very very warm-hearted and incredibly handsome Matthew Hussey ☀☆☀ :)

    Susanne :)

  • Hey Matt.
    I keep on reading your articles and I am a big fan of your thoughts and opinions about women! I am myself writing a fictional book which is kind of based on the male-female psychology, the problems and solutions of the male- dominated society and how a female
    – dominated one could never be a solution.
    I’m only a teenager and do you know who has been my biggest inspiration?
    It’s Y-O-U!

    Just wanted to say that you are doing a really great job and some day you might just be the biggest factor leading to major innovation and change in all the sex-biased mentalities across this planet!
    You are the real and practical woman-guy.Keep it up. Loads of love. <3 <3

  • How do I feel loved? It’s in the little things like opening doors, making me a cup of tea without asking for it, driving when we go out, telling me what he and his buddies did on a long weekend even though I haven’t asked, texting, a phone call.

  • Men have 1st got to ask you out via shouting in public.Then they have to be shy.Then show you they don’t want a lot from the relationship as in not wanting sex. In addition I would love to have a guy who speaks softly.

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