Is He Making You Seem Crazy for Something You Want?

You’ve probably spent a lot of time in life figuring out certain things that are really important to you in a relationship.

But what if when you express your need for something, the person you’re with makes you feel unreasonable, high maintenance, or even crazy?

In this week’s video, I coach a woman whose partner doesn’t value physical affection like she does. You’ll hear what happens when she expresses that she’d like more touch from him…

Learn How to Ask for What You Need in a Relationship.
Tap Below for Your FREE Training…
http://www.HowToGetExclusive.com

Woman:

I recently talked to a guy, dated a guy that said that my expectations, my standards were unrealistic because I like physical touch. I like intimacy.

 

Matthew Hussey:

And he doesn’t?

 

Woman:

He isn’t really like touchy feely…

 

Matthew Hussey:

He’s not touchy feely?

 

Woman:

Yes. And I… that’s very important to me. When we sit down…

 

Matthew Hussey:

So then why are you with that person?

 

Woman:

I don’t know.

 

Matthew Hussey:

I know that’s a blunt thing to say, and it might sound like a lot to say, “Well, you should leave a person because the level of affection you want is here, and the level they want is here.” But it’s not really that crazy of a thing to say, because you just said it was really, really important to you. And it feels like therefore you’re ignoring a piece of you that’s really important to you that’s going to continue to make you unhappy and suffer in a relationship.

 

Woman:

Because he says, “Well, people don’t do that. People don’t walk around and just hold hands.”

 

Matthew Hussey:

I do. I do. So you need to find someone like that. So instead of allowing someone to convince you that their worldview is The Worldview, go find someone with your worldview. Because all he’s doing is trying to… a lot of us do it for survival, right? We do it because, “I need to make you believe that what I do is the norm so that you don’t challenge me on it.” But he’s not representative of all men, there are many different types of men, and if that person has a radically different view of things that are important to you, we can have all sorts of different views on things in relationships. But when they’re your core…

 

Woman:

That’s it. I tell him that my core values… I’m not asking you to make $250,000 a year. I’m not asking…

 

Matthew Hussey:

I’m asking for a hug and a handhold.

 

Woman:

Or if we’re watching a movie, if you ain’t touched me, I might as well be sitting next to my daddy.

 

Matthew Hussey:

Right, you want to snuggle up. Yeah, of course.

 

Woman:

Yeah, something that’s showing, “I’m your girl, you’re my guy.”

 

Matthew Hussey:

Yeah. Go find that guy. Don’t find a guy that you need to convince to give you a fucking cuddle.

 

Woman:

Exactly.

 

Matthew Hussey:

You got to be like… Listen, to me, the best part of watching a movie with someone is you’re spooning the hell out of that shit. That’s the person I want. I don’t want someone whose like, “Not really, I’m fine. I need my space.” All right. I want someone who’s affectionate. So you do too. So go find that, life’s too short. What are you going to do, hang out with someone all day that’s never going to give you the level of touch and affection you want? You’re going to be affection starved, you’re going to starve.

 

Woman:

Yes. Build resentment and …

 

Matthew Hussey:

Yeah, it’s going to drive you crazy. And that person is always going to make you feel like you’re crazy for wanting it.

 

Woman:

Yes, definitely.

 

Matthew Hussey:

So no, and go find someone who can do that. I know that’s a hard bit of advice to hear in a couple of minutes, when you’ve actually got to go home and face the reality of letting go of someone who’s not going to give you that. But if you’ve had an honest conversation and it’s not improving, and this person is just making you wrong for feeling that way, then you got to go and find someone who it fits more easily. Great relationships aren’t easy, but they shouldn’t be that difficult, no. All right?

 

Woman:

Thank you.

9 Texts No Man Can Resist

15 Responses to Is He Making You Seem Crazy for Something You Want?

Leave a Reply

Your email address will not be published. Required fields are marked *

[(args.length - 1)]
[(args.length - 1)]
Read previous post:
What ‘turbo relationships’ tell us about moving too quickly in love…

Stephen Hussey The pandemic takes its toll, not only on personal health but also the health of our relationships. For...

Close