You both go to watch the latest comic book movie together (he likes DC, you like Marvel). You spend hours discussing your dreams, books you love, the kind of house you’d like to live in one day. You text him most nights before you go to sleep.
This guy is your best friend.
Maybe he’s been close to you for a long time. Or maybe only in the last 6 months. But now you’re starting to think of him in a romantic way.
So how do you know if you’re actually falling in love with your best friend?
Here are the 7 signs to look out for:
1. You get jealous when he goes on a date
Or when he kisses someone. Or when he gets a woman’s phone number. Or when he talks about a co-worker he’s attracted to.
As soon as you get interested on more than a passing level in who he’s dating, you know that you’re feeling something more than friendship for this guy.
2. You criticize other women he flirts with
If you can’t help yourself and end up running down other women he likes, “Ugh, she dresses so slutty”, or “God, she’s so annoying”, then it could be because you’re secretly trying to steer him away from any potential romantic prospects.
One of the clearest signs of being in love with your best friend is getting judgmental about other people he’s into and not being able to hide your opinion.
3. You spend late nights in his bed together
Even with the closest friends there needs to be boundaries.
One of the biggest symptoms of being in love with your best friend is crossing the line of healthy distance.
For example, if you find yourself doing lots of “girlfriend” type activities with him, like sleeping in his bed, making him breakfast, having long cuddles watching a movie, you need to ask yourself whether it’s innocent buddy behavior or whether it’s because you’re secretly hoping he’ll eventually make a move on you.
4. You keep wanting to be near him in social gatherings
It’s natural to be a little attached to your close friend when you go to a party together. But, if people CONSTANTLY mistake you for his girlfriend…and you’re kind of happy about it…and then you look at him expectantly as if you want him to see you that way…then you might want to check your feelings.
5. You can’t help touching him
When it’s love, you need more than just closeness. You’ll want to hug, touch his hands, give him a massage, or stroke his arm when you’re watching TV.
You’ll even find yourself wanting to be near just so you can smell his laundry detergent (which you already know WAY too well). Yep, that’s not normal friend behavior.
6. You cruise his social media looking to see what he’s doing
Do you wonder what he’s up to on holiday? Wondering if he’s DM’ing some girl on Instagram right now? Maybe browsing all his social media profiles will give you the answers.
But hey! He’s just a friend right? Can’t you just be curious?
There’s a fine line between browsing and investigating. Usually the latter happens when you deeply care about him and want more than just a passing role in his life.
7. You talk to your friends about him…ALL THE TIME
Maybe your other girl friends have heard so many stories about this guy that they’re begging you to stop already, or they’re telling you to suck it up and just go ask him out already.
Whatever the sign, if you find yourself constantly talking about him to anyone who will listen, you know you’ve begun falling in love with your best friend.
It’s time now to make a decision: you either need to talk honestly about your feelings with him, or put some healthy distance between you if he doesn’t feel the same so that you can move on and find someone else.
Don’t be the woman who loses a year or more of her life pining for a guy who isn’t returning her feelings. Give yourself time, refresh, and invest in a man who truly wants to be with you.