Something I Want to Talk About…

I must have read the same comment 1000 times now: “Matt, all your advice tells us women we have to do everything, while men get away with being lazy, useless, selfish, etc. How is that fair?”

If you’ve ever even vaguely felt that the dating game is rigged unfairly against you, I really need you to hear this…

►►  Become who you want to be. I’ll show you how at →

81 Responses to Something I Want to Talk About…

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  1. Sarah says:

    I don’t usually leave comments, but I am so impressed with your persona and the way that you offer your advice, which is so genuine and eye-opening, that I just had to let you know.

    I have always been so confident and have always had great relationships, but my partner of 2 and a half years, who has always devoted his love to me has recently withdrawn and has left me completely puzzled. This led me to research male psychology, and consequently find your website.

    You have enabled me to understand more about why men behave in certain ways but more so I feel as though I am starting to shine again by looking more into myself and focusing on understanding my own emotions and why I am reacting in the ways that I am in response to his behaviour.

    Thank you for the information that you are sharing. You have a wonderful energy and spark. You are absolutely amazing at what you do!

    I would also like to wish all of the women who are also drawn to you, all the best in finding a man who deserves them and not to put up with anything less!

  2. Maria says:

    I have a question: you said that men are territorial and insecure, like it was a fact, so how do you expect from those men who follow you to change for better? And honestly, that just sounded like if they were some kids. I don’t think that all men are like that, or should I?

  3. Daphine says:

    Hey matt how can i get to ask you something personal. As in ur email or contact or anything.

    • MH Support says:

      Hi Daphine! Due to Matt’s extremely busy schedule of live events and media appearances, he is no longer able to offer one-to-one coaching. However, his 5-Day Retreat offers intensive training in a live setting with him that costs nowhere near one hour of his private coaching fee, and promises 10 years of personal growth. Note that there is an application process to attend. To learn more about this life-changing experience, visit – Mars

  4. Lana says:

    I’m a huge fan and have attended your seminars, read your book and your fast track, which allowed me to meet a wonderful man whom I’ve been dating for a few years now. I think your message is so important but what do you say to the man when he says, “let me be the man”.

  5. Lily says:

    Dear Matthew,
    thank you so much for always believing in our potential to become better persons.
    As someone who has suffered from severe depression for the most of her life, which of course has affected all aspects of how I’ve been living it so far including my love life, let me tell you that your advice has helped me so much more in substance than many of the treatments I’ve undergone, and I’m saying this with the biggest respect towards the great therapists and friends who have supported me.
    It’s been years after I first started following you that I seem to finally be in the position to truely embrace your message, and this clearly could only happen because of the great level of empathy, warmth and intelligence both emotionally and intellectually that you convey through your language and as a person.
    I still have a long way to go, but at least I can now start to feel confident that I am going to be alright and also find a loving person I can share my life with.
    I’m sure there are tons of other people out there who deeply appreciate what you’re doing and just don’t find the time or energy to write it down, just like me until this moment, so maybe let me say all this on their behalf, too, and if you also draw your great energy from positive feedbacks, I’m giving it to you wholeheartedly here.

  6. Jen says:

    Hi! I’m a new fan and these videos have helped me get out of bed these days. I recently was talking to a guy for less than a month, and he was unsure of where the relationship was going so as a defense mechanism, I told him to just stop contacting me. Now I miss him and don’t know what to do. If he thought the relationship was not going to go anywhere, did I do the right thing in asking him not to talk to me? Or should I have let it carry on with hopes of it turning into something more…I was just scared that continuing to hook up and talk was going to make me fall for someone who isn’t in it 100% which I have done in the past. But I do want to explore things with this guy but I guess it’s too late now. If you can shed some light on this, I would greatly appreciate your time.

  7. Marisol says:

    Three years ago I felt like such a failure in relationships. A failed marriage and a failed long time relationship seem to point the finger at me, the source of failure. Not until I saw you in person in NY, did I start believing in myself again. Beside you being charismatic and so gosh darn good looking, I felt you are intuitive to a woman’s need. Because of you, I put myself out there and found the male version of me. We are so compatable in so many ways without being the same. We have been dating for 3 years now and recently moved in together. I now know that I wasn’t the only problem in my past failed relationships, I was missing a teammate’s help and communication. If for any reason my present relationship fails ( highly unlikely), you have encouraged me to never give up on love.

  8. Angelica says:

    I generally find your content to be helpful. Perception is reality though, so I am happy that you are invested enough to care about those who receive the message differently than you intended.

    I am in the process of recognizing and accepting my authentic self. What feels good to me versus what feels not so good. The content you deliver helps me create awareness about what I’m putting out and what I am allowing myself to receive. Sometimes that content helps me see that I’m doing really well. Sometimes that content helps bring awareness to where I can improve. Sometimes that content helps me feel empowered. Sometimes that content helps me laugh – which I also really enjoy!

    Thank you for your willingness to contribute in a positive way.

  9. Mila says:

    Hi Matt!
    I really love and appreciate what you are trying to show us, it has incredible value in pushing forward dynamics between men and women.
    And what I’m about to say is partly related to the video above because it is true, sometimes it feels just too exhausting to be the best version of yourself and not actually seeing a similar response from the others you interact with.
    But I would say my problem is a bit deeper…. and the problem is that I don’t know what is that I want from men. Understanding men is amazing but without knowing what I want there it won’t be much progress.
    Not sure if there are other women that feel like this… But if there is any video on this topic it would be amazing! :)

    • Nicole says:

      I too feel the same. Let me clarify , I know how I want to be treated by a man and/or the qualities I want. However, not sure what I want from the man or from whatever our relationship …..

      I too would love it, if Matthew has a video/advise for us in this area!!!???

  10. Cielo says:

    Excellent message Matthew, I agree 100%….

  11. Annie says:

    People who are saying that you are telling women to do all the work have not been paying attention to you at all. You have always ascribed to us being the best people that we can be. Love will follow.

    I always compliment others, men and women. When I see something beautiful, I say something. No motive other than to spread joy and appreciation. If you don’t want to be happy and confident, don’t blame Matthew. Look in the mirror. He’s trying to help everyone.

  12. Michele says:

    Absolutely! You are bang on the money with this one, you’ve nailed it, I couldn’t agree more! Watch most of your vids and have your book. Just wanted to say… have NEVER got the feeling from you that women should do all the running, quite the opposite. You have ALWAYS made it clear, there are some not so nice people out there, watch for the red flags, stay away. Male or female, you shouldn’t even want to get involved with someone who doesn’t show a certain level of respect/consideration for you and what you give. Thank you for your focus Matt, I am me … and you are great!

  13. Krissy says:

    What a great message to arrive at a great time. I sometimes can feel deflated when I’m not receiving the same behaviour/care I’m providing. it’s so easy to withdraw but I need to remember to continue to lead by example which will set the standard and if others don’t care to meet that standard that I expect then a gentle note now to move on and find someone who will!

  14. Karen Bray says:

    Well said Matthew
    My outlook entirely Be The Best You you can be always

  15. Laurie says:

    Love the message, Matthew! Yes, who we are at our core should not depend on the behavior of others. We should always strive to be the best version of ourselves no matter how other people behave/don’t behave/react/don’t react. Thank you for the reminder: “Who do you want to be?” and “Personable responsibility and accountability.” Love it!

  16. Lana says:

    Matt, pls do a video on how to deal with bf/husband who checks out other woman. I understand that they will always be good looking people around but still sometimes the way they look at girls is just disgusting, it’s like they are undressing the girl in front of you.

    The girl will also be thinking she must be really awesome if a guy with a gf/wife beside still checks her out. It also says ike if she flirts with him he will go home with her.

    And what if even after talking abou this issue he still does the same.

  17. Jack keane says:

    I would like to receive your videos.

  18. Amy says:

    Wow, Matthew. I’m surprised people have made these comments to you. I’ve always found your videos, blog posts, podcasts, etc to be so encouraging and helpful. I have always appreciated your focus on helping women understand men, and have always viewed your insight as helping me to learn how to date better. Your advice has helped me become more confident in the way I interact with guys I’m interested in or dating, and more confident in walking away when a person isn’t right. And honestly, if I’m into someone, I WANT to put effort into making him feel appreciated without chasing him away. I’ve never felt like you’ve told us to do all the work. I’ve honestly felt like you’ve told us how to interact so that we get treated well and get the interest we deserve. I’m so grateful for your insight. And also, as a person with 3 jobs who struggles to make ends meet, your array of free help has been a godsend. Thank you for what you do, and please don’t get discouraged. You are helpful and funny and kind and sincere and have truly made a difference in my relational happiness. Cheers!

  19. Susanti R Lubis says:

    That was very consider but for me a married women that had stumbled w/ partner i can used your advices here to lead my step ahead. Which i have been asking tons of times to get divorce but still stuck. Been shared from 1989/ get married.frustrated

  20. Dani says:

    I don’t want to merely live by the golden rule. I want to do more unto others than I want them to do unto me and I know I can do it. Took me a while to get my “force of nature girl” attitude back after the death of my husband but living proof it can be done! Matt- your info is terrific. Insightful and makes you think. Thank you!

  21. Heather says:

    You are incredible. Love the message and the warmth and depth with which it was delivered. I find myself coming here continually to have my thinking challenged and I’m never disappointed! :)

  22. jeydaa says:

    Hello Matt,

    I would love to meet you face to face but I don’t think that would ever happen. I’ve been watching your videos for about almost a year now. I’ve learned so much from you and also about myself along the way. I want to write to you this time to affirm the core message in this video.

    Earlier this year I started texting and hanging out with a crush. In the beginning, I didn’t know how to act (given my lack of experience in romantic relationships), so I fell into the trap of analyzing every text received and trying to figure out how to respond to keep him interested. It was exhilarating! My mood would changed depending on his response.It was like, I was at the mercy of his behaviors.

    This game of over analyzing and reacting started to become exhausting to me. One of my core values is authenticity and I realized that I wasn’t being my real self with him. I was afraid that he wouldn’t like me anymore if he sees my authenticity. On the other hand, while he was attracted to me, his attraction was merely hooking up level. I was open to exploring whatever was happening but his texts were always short and came weekly. It drove me nuts because I’m a talkative person by nature and I text the same way I talk (meaning I send long texts). A few months after we started texting, I gave up trying to be someone I wasn’t and started to reply the same way I would reply to a friend: Long texts or carrying on conversations. My thinking was, it doesn’t matter how he perceives my texts or how I behave, I want to be me. Being me means I engage without expecting anything in return. If he reciprocates, wonderful. If not, I won’t be disappointed. I felt liberated when I made that decision to be authentic, regardless of his judgement or perception of me. I am the only one who who wear my shoes and I want to be the best person I can be.

    Thank you for sharing this video.

  23. Shibru says:

    Thank you very much for interesting subjects video!
    I have been showing some of your videos,
    I really impressed and decided to change my life.
    Thank you

  24. Liz Hoffman says:

    Hell Yes, and that is what I’m talking about!!!! Boom !!!!. That is why I love about you. The essence YOU. A beautiful caring, loving genuine soul. thank you for this video I’ve always known and understood that this is your intention. But some people do not understand the strategy’s of business and what is needed to share your passion. It like fishing for fish. How in the business world marketing is like casting the hook into the pond to catch your fish. You are brilliant and thank you for today’s Video. Forever a follower of you and love of what you create. Your soul Sister from New Zealand – Liz Hoffman

  25. Linda says:

    Thank you, Matthew, for being an incredible, caring and accountable man for your audience. This Thanksgiving Week I’m thankful for you as a person of integrity. Linda

  26. Cassie says:

    The longer I follow Matt’s videos and teachings, the more I realize how happy I am on my own. The dating I’ve done and relationships I’ve been in were only because it’s what others seemed to think I should do. I’m tired of being what everyone else wants me to be. It’s miserable. I have a life to live and I’m done seeking others’ approval. Thanks Matt

    • Natalie says:

      Amen! I second Cassie’s comments. I started watching casually, while curious to put myself out there more, and make more of an effort. Matt, you’ve really helped me discover my inner confidence, but also acknowledge habits and flaws that I can improve on – most importantly – without beating myself up.

      And that has given me HOPE, encouragement to work on MYSELF, which makes it easier to be alone for the most part, but more confident when a guy DOES strike my fancy.

      I don’t know who these people are, it seems sad to be so bitter. I’ve never had a problem paying a compliment – even to someone I didn’t like – if I thought it was due. I don’t see your advice as telling us we have to do all the work at all – if anything, I feel like it shows us where to invest and where to not try so hard.

      Your encouragement has been absolutely priceless, and even though I’m still working on me, I’ve noticed more attention due to the confidence you’re helping me find. You rock! <3

  27. Liss says:

    I just left a relationship where I was investing more in it than the guy was… and as I was going through the process of realizing that my efforts were not being appreciated or reciprocated; I kept thinking about Matthew’s advice to not put more energy into it than the other person. That a person who is worthwhile will contribute to develop a relationship. In fact, as this guy let me down quite a few times, I could almost imagine what Matthew would say along the lines of “Don’t do more! This guy isn’t worth it – move on!” I don’t regret that I made that effort – because I believe in being kind and generous. And I’m glad that I moved on.

    And am looking forward to giving compliments to someone who will appreciate them ; )

    Thank you Matthew Hussey!

  28. Insha says:

    Mathew I don’t take your advice only in one prospective…i just want to be kind and humble and a bit more understanding in every type of relation I share … I never have miss understood you are my teacher and my guide …if I have become kind and understanding towards the people (strangers as well as towards the people I know) just because of you.. so lot of love stay happy stay blessed .

  29. Julie MacKenzie says:

    Loved the video…we should always be the best we can be…;)

  30. Lucie Marcela Havelka says:

    Wonderful Matthew! We are all PEOPLE, who should strive to be the best version of our selves. If for nothing else, than for making the world a btter place. Just like you are :)

  31. Zita says:

    I have never felt that the dating game is rigged unfairly against me, as a woman.


    But I’m surprised to hear that other women feel this way …

    Hopefully by listening to messages like this one you can realize that it’s not so.


    Thank you Matthew for another great message – you’re so sweet and kind and it comes across so well in your videos that it often makes me teary-eyed. In a good way!

    Keep it up.

  32. Victoria says:

    I love what you say Matthew and I couldn´t agree more!! There´s a beautiful quote, it´s “don´t treat people as bad as they are, treat them as good as you are”. And I won´t stop following it, because I want to love myself each and every day and treating people in a warmhearted, kind and loving way, that´s how I can look into the mirror and love what I see. Thank you so much for everything!
    Hugs from Vienna

  33. Cory says:

    So happy to hear “good enough” isn’t good enough for someone other than me!

  34. Holly says:

    “Why do I have to change..” because you are the one watching the video. You are in control of your own actions and choices, and whoever the other person is, you can’t make them do or choose anything.
    If they are terrible..keep shining and being the very best version of yourself. They can be with you and see your effort and be good to you..or be gone. When you are your best self, you will gleefully say goodbye to those people because you will want to be around people who bring out that amazing person who you LOVE to be. Not people who crush it.

    This is what I’ve learned in 2 years from Matthew. Thank you! (Still haven’t gotten any guys, though. ;D lol!)

  35. Angela Montalbano Davidson says:

    Hello Mathew

    Thank you for this and I understand. I’m hearing that you are wanting to give us insight into the human nature of men and women so we can develop skills to have great relationships. It’s amazing to me how such a young man can have so much wisdom but I’m thankful you are sharing. P.S. Can tell you are working out, looking fit.

  36. Hannah El Hamalawy says:

    Happy international men’s day! <3 And thank you for such a wonderful message!

  37. Tina says:

    I love your message today! I, too, have been one of those who wondered, “Why don’t you advise more men? I’m the one doing most of the work.”

    The truth is that I love my life and am not a lonely person. It is hard to find someone who is worth dating but at least I am not wasting my time or my family’s time with someone wrong for me.

    The wrong guys have ended up draining my time and energy. Worse, my peers may still ask about them while I would rather focus on something more fun and positive.

    That being said, I would love to hear your thoughts about graceful ways to disengage with interested but wrong guys. Guys can be horrible with rejection and I don’t want any drama or trauma.

  38. Amy says:

    Good video matt here is A lovely quote from a marriane Williamson book I read – Angels do not light long; they fly away when love denies them. They do not linger in the regions of earthly fear. Angels only come to pick up passengers, to fly away with them to paradise. Everything else is so ultimately silly, and everything else is so sad.
    There is one more thing to know about the angel who came for you. The angel who came to fly you to paradise in reality had only one wing. She needed the angel in you to come forth, to be to her what she was willing to be to you. Thus your need for, your dance, your flight with each other. Together, you would have had one set of wings.
    Next time she comes – whoever she is- perhaps you will not deny her. Next time she comes, be humble before the Lord. Next time she comes, admit your pain. Next time she comes, come forth yourself. Next time she comes, let go your resistance.
    Next time she comes, be brave. ❤️

  39. Francesca Agostini says:

    I am pretty sure I am the girl of your dreams.

  40. lauren says:

    Absolutely awesome message.. just perfect!!!

  41. Suzanna says:

    Hi Matt,

    I am so glad that you made this video. I listen to your advice and put it into practice. However, every guy I have dated for the past year has turned me down telling me that they are not looking for anything serious. Some of whom have gone into relationships straight after dating myself. I feel that I am working hard to become the best version of me and am looking for a man who is doing the same. I am not desperate for a relationship, I will not settle for someone who is the wrong person for me. I am on a self love journey so I feel like why should I be saying, “Oh there must be something wrong with me, what am I doing wrong” But as this has been happening for the past year, I thought I would ask for some friendly advice.

    Also, love the videos!

  42. Danette says:

    Thanks for that message and I agree. Dr. Deepak Chopra said “Become what you want to attract”. This has become my mantra in relationships. Not only with men but with everyone! If you want loving, caring, kind people in your life, then become a loving, caring and kind person.

  43. Jess says:

    The beacon…I love this idea!

  44. Karen says:

    I think that was the best video you have ever done. For a long time I have felt that all your advice is good and interesting but I felt like it would be just too hard work to remember everything if I ever tried to date again so I just didn’t dare try. Now I am thinking that the best I can do is focus on myself and be the best me I can be. Thanks.

  45. Aria Curameng says:

    It’s almost like you know what I’m thinking about the minute I wake up Matt! I’ve been crticized lately for the investment I’ve shown in this one gentleman, who has been going through not just mental, but physical exhaustion so his investment isn’t the best at the moment. In the past I’ve been told I care too much about my friends. These comments have made me feel bad for myself, like I am supposed to only do things when people do something for me. I see it that way sometimes, but what my friends don’t understand is that they give meaning to my life everyday. The genlteman I mentioned earlier thinks I’m “too good of a friend” to him, but I’m just doing a small act of kindness because it makes me feel good (not to mention he was investing so much time in me when I didn’t want him or didn’t have time). I believe I’m a warm and giving person, and I just want people to always pass it forward. Thank you for this video!

  46. Selene says:

    Well,yeap, some guy friends ask for my advice because yours gave me lots of sparkling things in my own relationship.

  47. Denise says:

    Your sincerity speaks to me. I appreciate you and the work you do. Great life lesson here. Priceless.

  48. Michele Vander Linde says:

    What a great video. FYI this is why I follow you and listen to you as opposed to many others in your field. You are about personal growth. You break down the gender gap. Not just preach about what women should do. I’ve never commented before, but thought it important to today. You have a gift of insight, and are wise beyond your years. You’ve enriched my life greatly with your videos, blog and advice emails. Keep it up and thank you!

  49. Julie says:

    Brilliant coaching. I’m a huge fan.

  50. Anna says:

    Thanks Matt for saying all that! I was feeling like it was all on me, so when it didn’t work I felt like I’m the one who failed and like it was all my fault. Truth is that even if you do everything right the other person can still not respond and act like asshole.

  51. Gaby says:

    I have to admit my relationship was doomed for a while. These 11 months have been bumpy but beautiful at the same time. About the first 6-8 months my boyfriend was selfish and not so considerate of my emotions. I made decisions to do kind things such as love notes, his favorite candy gift every now and then, have dinner ready most days out of the week. All of the kind things i did for him began to be responded. He sent me roses to my job, he brings me my favorite candy occasionally, he orders delivery for dinner sometimes, and we’ve been having amazing deep conversations. I could have easily called it quits many time, but i felt he had been hurt so much that he needed to see for himself that i was not one of those women but a true lady that cares for him. And a lot of praying for guidance from above. My heart knew where to lead me, my mind knew to guide me so i wouldn’t get heartbroken. My first relationship in roughly 7 years. Now today is my birthday and he has a surprise for me and i will find out tonight.
    The ladies have to get to know the men they are with and have to decide if the work is worth putting in for the man or if it’s time to walk away. I chose to stay based on seeing his relationship with his parents and the resemblance to mine.

  52. Misha says:

    Hi Matt,

    We should stop investing in the wrong person and I totally agree with that. But does not that contradict “giving your best self, regardless of what everbody else does” statement?

  53. Elkster says:

    Such an important message and very well said, Matt! Like attracts like! Try and be a better person every day, but don’t allow yourself to be a doormat!


  54. Faizah says:

    When we work on ourselves, we don’t (mainly) for ourselves. It makes us happier and whole. And within a relationship, we’ll be the prize.

    Thank you Matt.

  55. Holly Thibault says:

    tried twice to leave a long comment and was kicked off….

    • Holly Thibault says:

      I guess not…

    • MH Support says:

      Holly, the long comment you referred to has just been approved and published! :) We read comments before publishing them so we can moderate for spam – that’s why they’re not published instantly. Thanks for sharing your perspective! – Mars

  56. Holly Thibault says:

    Matthew, I was one of the women who left a comment stating why do we have to do all the work. I believe that men do the very lease to get by in a relationship. I was married for 25 years. I did everything. I should have dumped his butt years ago but we had 2 girls together. So I stayed. He cheated, I divorced him. Why do men think they can ask for and get everything but give nothing and then expect sex???? That would be a great video to do with a female counterpart….Your message is great, but you need a women’s perspective to get the point across so women can hear it. If there was a woman spokesperson there with you filling in the parts for men it would be very effective. It would balance out the real message you are trying to share with women. Make sure she is self-aware and very smart! Thanks for this video, it validated that I was not the only one feeling that way.

  57. Leecis Perry says:

    Matt, first, your retreat basically saved my life. An exercise you lead about “being dead”. That was my first awakening from the walking dead. Thank you. Second this video made me think INTENT! Who do we all want to be? If your intent to make changes towards the better you is to “get the guy”. You will be very frustrated. I learned this first hand. Intent to be a better you and be happier is the goal. Once this is achieved, any of our goals and dreams can be attainable, including “your man”

  58. Regina says:

    Dear Matthew,

    This Regina from Riga, Latvia writing you the first time. With this email I want you encourage and show my support. And I do know, that you already know, that the work you are doing is needed and makes a difference in so many lives. Your heart is at the right place. Just keep following your calling and your focus no matter what. I have been following your messages since this summer I guess, your content is genuine and comes from your believes, your passion, the last email especially, it comes so deep from your heart :) Sometimes really it feels that out there is a good and smart friend always encouraging, making laugh or think and ask the right questions to myself. I do believe I have found a great advisor, friend in you and I’m so glad about it. I do want to confirm, that definitely not only I (EN is not even my first language ;) but also many other listeners do understand your messages, when you talk about the behavior women should consider and apply. And I do appreciate the message you emphasise so often – to be whise to whom you should invest yourself.
    And a big thank goes out to you for what you do and the way you do deliver your “on the sofa” messages – so authentic and sincere and sometimes really funny LoL
    You are awesome and please do keep doing what you do best!

    Best greetings,

  59. Simona says:

    Most of the time you get something in return when you give away a present. And our loving and caring behaviour is also a present. Matt, you are right, there are persons out there who do not deserve presents. But there are also many who do,

  60. Denise says:

    Love you Matt, thank you for the inspiration xx

  61. Biancamaria says:

    Thank you Matthew for being so generous and always at your best. Yes you are right, you are setting the exemple and you have insipired me in doing just the same. Thank you. I wish to apologise in advance for any mistake I will make in expressing myself, English is not my first language.
    I have stumbled upon your videos by chance and actually a very fortunate one, I am amazed by your sapience and deep knowledge of human souls, at your age! You certainly work hard, but there is more to it, you have a true gift.
    You have convinced me that I should get back into the game, that it is always better to be at my true best, that we females and males are yes different, but there is an opportunity whenever we acknowledge each other as valuable human beings, whenever we give ourservels the freedom to be. Not easy though.
    I am working on myself, thanks to YOU, I am trying to find what is valuable in me, who am I today and what kind of human being I want to be. When ready I will try and go out into the world (2018 hopefully….bah).
    I will keep watching you, you make it easy!

    p.s. You have also set the bar at impossible high standards….You are aware of that aren’t you?

  62. Selena DeGray says:

    Matt but what happens if we try to do all of these things but nothing happens and the guy just starts to hate you instead of love you.

  63. Donna says:

    Matt thank you for this message. I’ve been starting to think about this. But before your video. I figured out that is not who I am. It feels natural for me to be positive about life and other people around me. They call me sunshine at work because of it. And i get hit on alot by men of younger ages. But I’m still seeking my love. We will find each other. Thank you.

  64. Leticia says:

    Hi Matt,
    I’ve followed you and got most of your products for more than two years now.
    Your methods might be universal, but I’m a Spanish girl living in Sweden, I’ve dated I don’t know how many people here and I can say they don’t work with this culture. That’s why I get some frustrated and I’m at a point in my life where I honestly don’t know if I should try to move to another country again.
    I recommend you to watch “The Swedish theory of Love”, it’s some sort of documentary and of course it’s biased and quite extreme, but I feel there’s some truth there.
    Thanks for this video, it’s really encouraging :)

  65. Inmaculada Navas says:

    Matt, couldn’t agree more with what you just said and it really touched me – I truly belief that by acting warm, generous, loving, simply the way that makes a difference in this world unconditionally it is the way to create real abundance in your life and attract what really counts!❤❤❤ Thank you for being the incredible person you are and sharing with us so much positiveness and love!!! Lots of love

  66. Djamila says:

    Matt, thank you!! This needed to be said. Your retreat turned me around and helped me step up and be the leader of my life. I am trying to explain to friends that my actions reflect what I think is the right things to do, even though it may be too kind or forgiving etc to some. But I feel I am true to myself, so I do it (up to a certain point). Which does not mean I am lowering my standards.

  67. Heidi Greenfield says:

    Matthew, take heart I have always thought that your videos are encouraging women to expect better. We should also be teaching our sons to be better me btw.
    If we expect more from men then they will step up xxx
    Thank you Heidi

  68. Anoushka says:

    I really appreciate you making this clear. It is important to recognize explicitly what great relationships look like in an age where women are still disproportionately affected by domestic violence, unequal household roles, sexual harassment etc and we are often raised to only see our worth through attention from men and in marriage.

    On a separate note, I’ve been thinking a lot about the phrase ‘personal responsibility’ used in personal development and spiritual leadership because those words have been used in politics to blame (‘they deserve what they asked the universe for’ )and turn backs on refugees, working class people, people of colour, lgbtq communities. I know that’s not how you mean it. This is a request I am making to you and to others in the coaching business. Perhaps for another dialogue. Perhaps ‘ownership’ is a better phrase?
    Really appreciate your work and all the thinking you do to help me understand love and romance.

  69. Candy says:

    I am so proud of you

  70. Deanie Shank says:

    Great message. So true! The retreat has been an the biggest catalyst for my amazing life-thank you Matt

  71. Mary Jane says:

    Thankyou for always inspiring not to give up on my journey.

  72. Crystal says:

    What if you slept with him when you first met him and now he doesn’t have time for you but you want to see him again

  73. A. says:

    So good to be on this journey with you, Matthew!



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