A couple of weeks ago many of you will know that I went on Ryan Seacrest’s radio show.
What you may not know is that I wasn’t exactly prepared for it…
In this week’s video I tell a little behind-the-scenes story of how I was thrown into the show without the chance to get fully prepared, and the lessons I took away from the experience in how to deal with such high-pressure situations.
From The Video
When something like this happens, we can immediately get resentful, we worry we’re not ready, and we start making excuses for ourselves.
The reality is, if you’re not in control of the situation, you have to be ready in the moment.
There were 3 decisions I made when this happened to me to shift my focus and that allowed me to perform under pressure.
1) Get Grateful
I told myself that, ‘This is an opportunity – no matter the form it’s coming in. It may have come at a time when I didn’t know it was going to come; I may not be completely ready for it, but it’s a great opportunity and I’m unbelievably grateful to have it.’
2) Get Back To Basics
If I communicate from a place of meaningful intention and authenticity, then I can overcome imperfections in the way I communicate. I may not have every answer polished in the exact right way, but if I communicate from the heart and I’m authentic, the audience is going to feel my passion.
3) This Is A Learning Experience
This is a great moment for me to try performing under pressure when I’m not ready for it. I now get to perform in a way that is spontaneous and unanticipated – and I know that there are going to be times in my future where I’m going to have to do this – so I might as well learn now.
What better way to learn than in a high stakes environment like this?
One of the greatest ways to change your state in any moment is to change your focus.
Is what you’re focusing on empowering you? Or is what you’re focusing on detrimental to your state?
If you determine your focus you’ll determine how you’ll feel – and of course when you know you can determine how you feel, you can bring a completely different game to any situation.
Here are the videos from the day with Ryan where you can watch me go through this process, and see me being part of a show I really wasn’t ready for.
The segment is split into 4 videos which should run through automatically on a playlist as soon as each one has finished. Just hit play to start. Enjoy!
Hopefully this helps you out with the next situation you’re in that throws you off guard.
Question Of The Day:
Not feeling prepared for a date? Not ready to meet the parents?
Where might the opportunity to use these 3 strategies in your love life come up in the near future? Let me know in the comments below!
Matthew, I have your entire Program (worth every pretty penny, Ladies!!!) and still haven’t finished watching all the video’s on it; besides all of your You Tubes. You came up with NEW IDEAS in this Ryan Seacrest interview on what to say to meet a man. I was so focused on your insightful and wise information that was as usual exceptionally articulated; I never would have known you weren’t prepared. Thank you for sharing this information, so that when we meet someone and for whatever reason aren’t prepared; we know what to do by your written blog and watching how polished you were in this interview!!!
Ha! By all indications, you settled in and focused on the task very well. This is a great example of how someone looks when they manage to engage in what’s important and not let the fact that they are woefully underdressed and got a bit blind-sided (or some other superficial thing) distract them from getting the job done. You were as quick and articulate as I’ve ever seen you. You jumped in, you done good.
(And now you’ll probably always carry a wrinkle-free dress shirt and a tie in your bag everywhere you go, right? LOL!)
xo
Oh, and as to applying the 3 Things: I have a lunch date tomorrow with someone I haven’t met yet but have been texting with for several weeks. I’ve been better about putting myself out there lately. I think he’s quite cute (which is a bit rare for me with someone I don’t know), but instead of letting that make me nervous and bringing my normal first-meeting reservation, I’m going in feeling free to just be whatever eclectic combination of “me-ness” happens to be on tap that day. If I like him and he asks to see me again, he gets a shot at a bigger part of the picture. If not, we are probably not a good fit anyway and I can wish him good luck. It’s amazing what having a wide variety of things to focus on in life does to your ability to let things fall where they may and be truly ok with it.
Hi Matt,
I’m sorry, I can’t avoid it, but I feel I have to play the coacher this time. To me it seems your feelings before the program came from:
1) Perfectionism. This is good since it let you get where you are now and I like the idea that you put so much effort to prepare your talks. It would have been bad if you wouldn’t have agreed to participate in the program at all. The example remind me when I was called in school to give an oral test that I wasn’t expecting. I started to cry (yeah, embarrassing) because I didn’t felt well prepared. Then I got the highest mark, but before I panicked at the idea of not doing my best (even if still I knew I was going to pass).
2) You may be used to the other TV show I’ve seen in your blog with these two ladies. They always make comments about your look and about you in general and you are more physically exposed (you are sitting at a high chair and the camera captures everything you are wearing). I like more the dynamic of this one, where the focus was more in the content of the message (well, at least the part I’ve seen).
Well, I hope you don’t take it bad, but couldn’t help writing this. As others said before, you did (and looked) great, as usual!!
like the vid on your thoughts and the other video’s gave me a good chuckle and at least your t-shirt was clean x
I think you did a great job for being caught off-guard. Don’t feel too bad about the t-shirt. I’m a costume designer and when I need my leading guy to stand out from a crowd sometimes I’ll put him in a plain white shirt or T-shirt. It works every time!
I’ll bet if you auctioned off that white t-shirt, you would see the enormous value in it!
By the way, I would bid on it. lol
Or better yet, if you would like to just mail it to me, thats perfectly fine and preferred!
thank you
lovely as always, Mr. Hussey
Happy Holidays :-)
I don’t believe for a second you own anything less than fabulous in your closet! You make the crappiest T-shirt in the world look like a million bucks! Truth!
Your work and words inspire me to be better than I once thought I was. Thank you for your videos and messages.
Keep it classy Hussey (and keep up the great work!)
Matthew
You know matt. You look great always. No matter what you say, it’s always so wonderful to hear you. And you looked perfect in that outfit. keep up the good work. Lots of luck for 2014
great subject.i’ve placed myself in this kind of situation and i became nervous
smart approach.this way of thinking can get the best of you
Great advice for any “crazy-making” situation!
Matthew Hussey
It wasn’t what I saw it was how I saw you
Thank you for showing me to continue to be myself
Authentic
you stand out more than the other two
Love the Posts x
It was a great show, crappy t-shirt and all. :)