Sensational, Sexy, and Violent Media

Today’s video is a break from my usual love-life videos. It’s a topic close to my heart that I’m really hot about right now.

I discuss the extent to which media really does effect our focus, and ask, can we blame the media?

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43 Replies to “Sensational, Sexy, and Violent Media”

  • so true Matt, I mentor some amazing young women and men and I feel by letting them know about my choices I made right or wrong that I help them make better choices for themseelves. Keep up the good work that you do.

  • The same thing is said about parents. They are responsible for how their child gets to be.But I have seen people who had bad parents and they become good and vice versa. Ultimately we decide what models to choose and what not.
    Maybe the media:
    1. underestimate our power to choose what we want to be and what not
    2. promotes immature behavior -not to take responsibility for youre own life
    3. they don’t know what else to talk about

  • There’re some interesting things that you’r saying in the video. With many of them I really do agree and hope people will realize very soon the importance of mentoring. They should also keep in mind that it is only people themselves who are responsible for their actions, behaviours and choices.

    But, when it comes to the media and media content, do you really believe that they’re not to blame at all?
    Don’t you think that with power comes responsibility?
    Power in the sense that the media have the ability to publish/broadcast content. They should take responsibility for what they air, and not air blindly everything that will be a nice little earner for them.

    The responsibility goes in both directions, in the direction of the sender and the receiver of the message.

  • A great point Matt, thank you. Mentoring can be life changing for kids. Predominantly because it makes them feel that someone is truly interested in them and cares about them enough to invest their time and their heart. Also that they are being heard and their opinions freely expressed and valued. I do worry though that there aren’t always enough mentors out there doing this in reality. Whilst there are also plenty are. My other concern is that there are some adults out there who aren’t emotionally intelligent who are able to detach their personal responsibility and accountability who have been given the gift of being a parent. What then…?

  • Well articulated Matt. I couldn’t agree more about it being our own responsibility to view the media as we choose, through educating ourselves and having our own, informed opinion. I have never been a fan of celebrity magazines but, about a year ago I moved house and made a conscious decision not to have a television. Quite frankly The Best thing I have ever done against procrastination and now, in hind-sight, a great way to remove certain external influences.
    I am out of the loop in certain areas but, Thanks to following a lot of your great advice, I have busied myself by getting out more, being more interested and generally studying people rather than swooning over George Eads in CSI!
    Subsequently I have an active and varied social life, I have a greater number of interests on a peripheral level and I am focusing on a couple of things to master.
    I digress- I had never seen this point from the angle of being a mentor. Thanks for sharing that idea, it makes great sense. I spend quite a bit of time in the company of bored teens and, through work this will probably increase! You’ve shown me yet another angle to view a point I also feel quite strongly about!
    Thanks Matt.
    I am enjoying hearing you broaden your topics for discussion. You’re not just about Love, I look forward to more of your views on life in general!
    See you next weekend in London!!
    Xxxx Elaine xxxX

  • Brillant Matt! I couldn’t have articulated that point as well as you have. The fact that people criticize the media more than seeking to be good role models is so true. Maybe it’s because we don’t feel like good role models or just that the media has to be stopped, but either way…its a wrong way to think about it. Changing the world doesn’t start with others. It starts with us.

    Love your videos! Keep it up!

  • Based on a lot of the content you’ve made & I’ve seen… you truly are a… magical genius. I’m coming to one of your events in NYC. I sincerely can’t wait to finally meet the man, the myth, the legend. But I will. See ya in person in July! ;D

  • Excellent advise and very smart answer for the topic of media influence!! Here Here!! Teaching/taking responosibility for ourselves in everyway is the key, very well said Matt!!
    Thank you

  • This is one of the strongest videos you’ve ever made. I agree with you and ask you to do more videos like this.

    Thank you Matt.

  • Matt, you are epitome of the kind of people we need more of in this world! Constantly I’m seeing many people (and formerly along with myself) blaming the media for this, or the media for that.. When in reality we need to reflect on ourselves. If we sat down and told our loved ones the truth, not some sugar coated bs about society and the media, then our youth wouldn’t give in to the medias bs in the first place! We desperately need to give our children a voice in todays age, but first.. We need to show them both sides of the spectrum before they try to believe what’s being shoved down their throats 24/7!

  • Sadly, it seem children aren’t being mentored. I was lucky enough that my mom made sure she knew what was going on when I was young however it did get a little old when I turned 30. I also believe children are being exposed way too early. Years ago I worked in a preschool and remember this 4 year old walking up to a little girl and saying, You wanna come to my place or yours and he didn’t mean play ground. I also remember having sex ed and most of the girls had no clue what was going on with their body. We are human beings we are curious especially as children between certain ages our minds are sponges. I could go on an on for hours but the bottom line is children are being exposed to too much to early and not being given good guidance. I know there are somethings they are going to be exposed to and it can’t be helped but we can pick up the reigns and set things straight.

  • I usually love you videos and look forward to each one, but this one was hard to listen to. I stopped watching about 3 minutes into it the first time as I felt like you had misinformation and debating the wrong issue and belittle the very important issue of the media’s portrayal of woman and the affect it has on our society. Nobody’s really saying that the media is to blame for the shootings (if they are, those people are wrong like you stated), most people are saying that the media has help create this culture where men feel entitle to sex with women and leave women feel afraid on a daily basis (please read the #YesAllWomen for a better understanding of the fear most women feel everyday).

    It is hard to deny the media’s influence on our culture, even yourself admitted to changing your drinking habits after watching Mad Men (1 hour a week for 23 weeks a year for a few years). What do you think happens to little boys when they are inundated with images, video, movies, video games, TV show, … showing women as sexual objects and/or prizes at the end of a quest (i.e. Super Mario Bros, Zelda, …). This is all poison ingested daily.

    You advocate mentorship. I’m all for mentorship, and I will help the boys in my life grow up to be respectful men. But how do I reach the boy that may, one day, assault my daughter? I reach them by asking the media to act responsibly and stop showing poisonous images. I’m not asking for censorship, I’m asking for them to portray women like real people.

    You probably won’t read this post, but here are some resources you may want to peruse to understand the issue better and make better informed videos:

    Miss Representation (movie): (trailer) (website)

    The Mask You Live In (upcoming movie): (trailer)

    The Hidden Meanings in Kids’ Movies (TedX):

    A great article about entitlement and the shooting: Your Princess Is In Another Castle: Misogyny, Entitlement, and Nerds

    I could go on…

    Please watch/read and be part of the solution.

    1. I really hope Matthew (and anyone else for that matter), checks out the content you linked. He’s missing the point in a big way. This isn’t about censorship.

      1. Thank you very much for reading my comment and checking out the links. I hope you’re not the only one!

  • Brilliant! Brilliant! Brilliant!!!! This is one of the things I have been learning recently thanks to your brilliant advice, video’s, books, along with others. Is that no one is responsible for my own life experience but me. And I have the power to choose what it will be. It is a very powerful truth that once realized can set your life on a path of strength and adventure, as opposed to a life of being the victim and isolating yourself from the world. Well said Matt! you’re so smart! ;) thanks for being such a great mentor for us!

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