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You’re Not Shy, You’re Boring – Part II

So last week I did a video on shyness which seems to have struck a nerve.

There were many comments – the majority overwhelmingly good – but also a little controversy which has led me to want to do Part II. Here it is. Enjoy!


Here’s the difference between ‘shy’ and ‘introverted’ as I see it:

–Introversion is associated with being part of someone’s nature.

–Shyness is derived from insecurity. It’s a polite word for being scared.

If we want to overcome shyness, we have to overcome rejection. There are two ways to do this:

1) Get accepted and reinforce a different behaviour

To see that you can talk to someone and get a positive result.

2) Get rejected more

More rejection doesn’t have to make you more insecure. If you talk to people who have to go through a lot of rejection every day – whether it’s people who make cold calls, actors going to auditions, you name it, they’ll tell you that they can become desensitised to that rejection.

We have to decide who we want to be – regardless of acceptance or rejection.

If you go into a situation craving acceptance, it’s going to feel needy and desperate and people will pick up on it.

Go for rejection. Get rejected as much as possible, because the fastest way to get accepted as much as possible (and from the people who will be most beneficial to you) is to be congruent with who you really are.

Hope you enjoyed the video! Thanks to everyone who commented last week. Stay tuned and I’ll be back with more soon!

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Having trouble with shyness? Check out my online program The Man Myth that will walk you through simple steps to meet more men, build attraction, and find out if he’s right for you.

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167 Replies to “You’re Not Shy, You’re Boring – Part II”

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