Isn’t it exhausting to be out there meeting guys, going on dates, and always coming home disappointed?
If you’re suffering from dating burnout, then I want you to listen closely. In this video, I share my simple strategy that lets you filter out the wrong men quickly so that you get to Mr. Right waaayy faster…
These Phrases Help You Nail that Pre-Date FaceTime Call.
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There is a premium to meeting someone in person. Because if I meet you right now –
Yes. [Audience laughs.]
L.A., you’re little rowdier than normal. Seriously.
If I meet you in person, in person, you already have done a bunch of calculations. “Do I like the look of him? Has he got good energy? Is he what he seems to be? How does he carry himself? How does he answer questions in real time.” Right? Not, “We’re texting and I know nothing. I don’t even know if you look like your picture anymore.”
That’s the crazy s*** now. It used to be the case that on Match.com they would say, “Add eight or 18 or however many pictures,” because more pictures equals more credibility, more credibility equals more matches. But now we live in a world where someone could have 100 photos of themselves on Instagram and look like none of them.
It’s extraordinary. So, we now have become suspicious. We now have realized that we don’t know anything until we meet someone. Ever had that experience? You think you have some chemistry, you think you’re attracted – you don’t know shit until you get in the room with someone. And then you know.
Which is why, still today, if you met someone right now after this event, it would be so much easier to get on a date with that person if you’ve exchanged numbers than if you met online. Because you already have that base level of, “I know you, you know me,” at least on that very superficial level. “We know what each other looked like. I’ve felt your energy. I kind of know what you’re all about. I’ve got a sense of you. I said that thing and you didn’t say an awkward thing back and it wasn’t weird and it was okay and I at least felt safe and now I feel like we could actually see each other again, even if just for coffee.”
Right? We’ve skipped a bunch of steps that you have to go through online, which, by the way, means if… Let me give you something that’s not intended to be a rule, but something I think you should bear in mind in dating in general. I think we should be reluctant, kind of, to go on a date with someone we haven’t, at the very least, FaceTimed with.
How many of you want to save time? A few of you? [Audience laughs.] Just not there with me yet where you’ll put your hand up? We’re not there. “I’ll put my hand up in an hour.” How many of you want to save time? Okay. Yes, because, by the way, your love life, the whole equation is time. The whole equation is time. We may as well be doing a physics lesson here on this stage because the whole f***ing thing is time. We have a limited amount of time. What do we do with it? Who do we give it? Who’s going to get my precious, precious time?
Darwin said, he who is willing to waste an hour has not yet recognized the value of time. That’s how important time is. Who am I going to give an hour to, right? That’s how important time is. Think of who you’re giving years to right now, by the way. Think of that s***. Who are you going to give an hour to? Who are you going to give an hour to, right? That’s what it comes down to.
I don’t want to go on a date with someone that I haven’t spent five minutes on FaceTime with. I just don’t. If we can’t get on FaceTime for five minutes, firstly, what does that say? What does that say if I can meet you in person but can’t do a quick FaceTime call with you?
At the very least, a phone call. At the very least. What does that say? “Well, Matt, not everyone wants to get on the phone.” Oh, then he’s a child. Then don’t go on a date with that person. What, do you think it’s going to get better? Like, “No, no, no, after we’ve dated, then we’re ready for a phone call.”
Don’t date that person. But do a phone call. Do a FaceTime. That’s where real connection is built. That’s where you know, at least, “Ah, okay, we have a little chemistry here. We can actually talk and have some banter. There’s something here to play with, to work with.”