Hey it’s Matt,
I made this video from my bedroom balcony on my Retreat on Clearwater beach.
It’s day two of the programme right now, three more to go! The changes so far have already been beautiful to watch. We had a woman who was so terrified of public speaking that she broke down in tears at the thought of it.
Within the space of 5 minutes she was on stage giving a speech. There were literally gasps in the
room followed by huge applause at how quickly she went from tears to confidence.
And that was just the second day!
In aid of this moment I decided to make a spontaneous video about stage fright. The cool part about it is that it can be used in situations with men that normally make you nervous too.
Matthew x
Question of the day:
What situation do you often find yourself in in your life where you would like to be more confident? Tell me in the comments below!
P.S. If you want more information on my 5 days retreats, you can check it out here.
The next Retreats are in Clearwater beach Florida this October and Palm springs California in December. Spaces are limited so apply now while they are available!
If you haven’t pre-ordered your copy of the GetTheGuy book in the United States, you can do it here: Amazon / Barnes & Noble
That was an amazing video! Just what I needed to watch! Thank you so much. I almost teared up because you make it sound so easy. I can’t wait to try this. I have tremendous stage fright, and my goal is to work through the fear this year… Thanks a Million!!!
Hey Matthew – Thank you so very much. I too am a perfectionist and suffer from stage fright. I have to give oral arguments in court tmo, and I am going in there to do an average job. Thanks again
You are awesome Matthew. I suffer from stage fright constantly, especially talking to that cute guy that I’m attracted to. Giving myself permission to just be average when I approach that guy takes the pressure off definitely. Thank you ! xx
Michele
This is an unconventional way of thinking. :)
While everyone tell us to do the best, here is Matthew Hussey advising us to do average.
I like it and I’m gonna try it. ^^
Amazing advice! Not focusing on being perfect actually will allow us to be ourselves, which is who we need to be when we are looking for someone to begin a relationship with! Secondly, this is can absolutely be applied in public situations where you are in the eye of everyone around you. I am an acoustic guitar soloist/singer and I actually just recently applied this technique and I wound up doing a much lovelier performance than I would have had I been focused on being perfect…and therefore focused on when I missed picking a note. Nobody noticed, and I even got very positive feedback! In the back of my mind, I heard you saying that “it’s ok to be average”…and you are so right! Now….I just need to apply this in the guy situations! However, my first and most mountainous problem is I attract the WRONG guys. Not “bad boys”…but old men! And the guys my age hang back…away from me. It almost seems like guys my age shut down if I go and talk to them. I’ve been in situations where I am asking them about themselves, trying to get them to talk, and they answer, but they don’t make initiative to really ask me about me, which as I understand means that they are not interested in me, I think? I will keep listening to your words of wisdom! I’m working on the eye contact thing! Thanks, Matthew!!!
When I have to go up to the whiteboard in my classroom I become nervous but when I start to talk then I think quietly to myself to take it easy, talk clearly and if a few classmates don´t like it so i just ignore them. And it is really working! :)
Hi Matt,
so I kinda break down when someone just decides to have high expextations in something I am spontaniously supposed to do… Sounds like an awekward thing, but when I tell people like… eg. well I can kinda sing a little, and someone asks me to just sing something it never turns out. I have that with all kind of things, though, which is really annoying. Could you give me some simple trick or mindset?
Thanks for your help, the blog is amazing,
Hannah
Well, that was unexpected… but makes sense. I try to tell myself to do myself justice, but I guess that just builds pressure. Average is good! :D
x
This is similar to what I usually tell myself except I tell myself to do my best but no more. Used to, if I didn’t do everything right, I’d get very upset and be mad at myself but after I changed my perception on it, (which I did because I made a fool of myself and made a bad situation worse) I’m much more forgiving because I can honestly tell myself that 1. I did the best I could and 2. It’s not the end of the world and I’m not *insert self insults*
Before hand it was, I didn’t do enough, I failed and I’m too *insert self insults* And as you can imagine I wasn’t too keen on picking up new challenges because I felt I had to do everything perfectly. If I wasn’t excelling, I was falling behind and that just wasn’t acceptable.
But now the more I fail the more things I try to pick up because I have to prove to myself that I can do things.
Lifechanging.