Is there someone in your life who keeps going hot and cold with the attention they are showing you?
In today’s video, I give you an exact message you can text a guy that demonstrates your powerful standards in a way that simultaneously gets you more attraction and more investment…
Get 9 “Copy & Paste” Texts that WORK. Tap Below for Your Free Download…
Did they tell you? Don’t name it because then you’ll keep it. And of course I had to name him after my favorite comic book, which made it even harder. What?
Just admiring the view.
Oh, so smooth… What the f***?
The the other day, I was told a story by someone who had a guy coming in and out of her life constantly.
Jesus. What the f*** was that?
And she got to a point where she was so sick of him showing investment and then disappearing, that one day when he texted her, asking her to go to dinner, after having disappeared for weeks, she just messaged him back and said, “Hey, listen, I like you but this dynamic we have where we start things up and then things go away again and then we start them up again… it’s just become boring to me. Like it’s no longer interesting. So if we’re just going to do the same thing again, let’s not bother with this.”
When I heard that story, I thought that is such a powerful word to use in that context, because so often people get angry, they get upset, they get hurt, and then they communicate all of that. And when we do that, in a way we’re still building up someone’s ego. We’re still showing them that they have a handle on our emotions. You either come back and you get my excitement or you come back and you get my anger and my frustration. I’m still making you very important in my life, even though you haven’t been investing and you shouldn’t be important in my life. But when you tell someone, “This dynamic we have is just boring now,” you’re shooting down their ego. You’re no longer validating that behavior. And so what happens is someone either disappears or they realize in order to attract you, they’ve got to start showing you a very different kind of investment. So either way you win: They disappear, or you get better quality investment.
Try it. The next time someone comes back into your life, instead of rewarding it with either a positive excitement, which they haven’t earned, or a negative energy, a negative emotion, which shows them that they’re still too significant in your life, try simply telling them that what’s going on between you is just boring.
27 Replies to “📱💬Text Him This ONE WORD to Get His Attention”
Great advice …as always….:)
My wife have left me for four time in 22 years marriage. We have two kids in this marriage. Daughter left with her to live and son live with me. Both haven’t call him or text him to see he do good in two months
Love that she’s reading Maria Popova’s book, Figuring! ❤️ Brainpickings!! Thanks for this video because it’s the dynamic that is boring not the person. Naming the dynamic as something untenable can shift it into something that can be. Thank you, Matt!!
Dis is exact dilemma i’m in….thanx for this.
Great video & example of HOW to deal
with hot/cold. Would love more examples
of HOW to react/respond to guys’ negative
behavior and comments.
Other “dating” issues…
How to spot and reject: Ghosters, breadcumbers, gaslighters, narcissists and otherwise manipulative behaviors and manipulators.
These dangerous “new dating” styles are undermining even the strongest confident women. It’s sick and sad that there are leeches out there who spend their lives sucking the happiness, confidence, love and life out of others only to move onto THEIR next “victim”.
Any advice that will help stop this “victimization” would be helpful and welcomed!!
********By the way it works!
MY experience was…and MY final comment was…
(Very sweetly said:) “THIS IS NICE, BUT IT IS NOT REALITY”
That took care of the tall, dark, handsome, sexy, *undecided man! He was able to make his decision.
NO Comment from him. Silence!
A month later he blocked on FB.
With that answer…I blocked him on-everything… Cell/FB and Instagram and every Social Media access! Yay!
And, for me, *back to my joyful life!!!
On point Matt! As always
Thank you Matthew you always hit it on the nail so to speak with your wonderful video clips! Louis met with me again last Tuesday as I had arranged dropping into his part of the woods for a coffee after I hadn’t seen him for about 4 weeks! I was ready to give him that lovely talk… I am looking for something special( had memorised it) and he came on quite hot towards me… didn’t show me coolness and I am going to go with him again Monday to see the apartments we are purchasing in the same block of units. However, just going to play it by ear! He usually plays quite cold after he has been hot this happens frequently so I will be ready with your words THANKYOU!!! I am 62 years old and he is 69 years old! Just to let you know !!! You are sooo committed to helping all us women out there and I think you are THE BEST Matthew!!!
Perfect response… bored with your shit
She seemed to be reinforcing texting and rejecting dating, but of course I understand the situation. It seems to come across as a bit of a threat. I wonder how that conversation would have gone at dinner before sex and if he said No then walk away. I have been studying Matthew’s work and have become ore assertive and authentic as a result.
These videos are always amazing and you have helped me progress so much!
Thank you so much, I don’t think he will understand it but i will give it a try. He just wants to see me when he wants it and no other time and he has taken off and not contacted for up to 6 mons at a time but i have sent him messages that say I am looking for a commited relasionship and that i feel he is not it so good luck and good by. he waited and came aoiund again. he even asked me out, then 1 hour befor date cancelld sent pic of three mons back say he had be be home so these guys could fix his fence. Told him don’t worry about it have a good life and he sent back ” Don’t be so dramatic. Thank you for the help.
Beautiful. I will use this context need be.
Hahahahahahah epic video! That girl and guy are great actors.
Lol, firstly it’s nit Love now is it! It’s … Attraction Secondly we have all felt it . Met my husband and married him 3 weeks later , it was Love at first sight!
Well 32 years later he is dead from his drug addiction I have three lovely kids from him , he was the love of my life but a complete mad man ! Yes sexy clever and exciting , but almost ruined me. So take your time ladies get to know him first . Ok maybe u will still fail but at least u did it with thought lol! Peace and love . X
interesting and Empowering Video.
I feel I may have taken a giant surprising awareness leap to regaining my Mojo on many different levels!
I realise now of the value of having an interesting partner. I had given up looking, I accepted through many mistakes that I was to only be happy with me as a solo entity. I continued watching your videos for both entertainment and to secretly cheer the team on as ‘Motivational Soeakers’ and ‘Life Coaches’ – ((…shadow echoes of Senik, Robbins, Walt & an endless list of many other’ favourites of mine live on in you…)).
I thought I had no right to judge the boringness of partners when I myself have nothing of interest to contribute. I found men took all my energy (& my tomboy toys) and left me worse for the experience. I wished I could turn back time to the beginning. I regreted nearly everything and nearly everyone.
I am grateful for your Awesome Funny video. I will reconsider my abandoned option of meeting someone. Maybe I will let the interesting ones get to know me. Maybe over coffee. Maybe men aren’t all the same? Maybe , yes maybe… I’ll see what your next video is. There’s no rush. Your message on Interesting Dynamics is a lot to take in for me about the opposite sex. I can’t believe all men aren’t shallow with limited dimensions. I’m intrigued, could there be some people out there that are Awesome ?
Maybe, it’s worth for me going on a date again??? I was a different person a long time ago. Maybe I may be just as interesting to someone else too?
Good one, i have loved it
Thank you. I have exes in my life that have become really great friends by using the terms “game over, spam, Who is this?” But my absolute favorite is Next. We then became friends when we laid out what was happening in both our lives. Then set boundaries for our friendships. Being honest with people does the feelings good. Love your program.
Hello Matthew I’ve been dealing with a man for four years now I’ve been nothing but patient understanding forgiving and supportive to this man he has a wall up because of being hurt in past relationships every time I feel as though I take one of those breaks out he replaces it with three more bricks thank you so much for this advice I’m definitely going to try this I love him but I love me more
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