Have you ever been so frustrated by a guy’s mixed signals that you just decided to finally confront him and ask where you stand?
If you’ve ever had a confusing answer from a guy in this situation, in today’s video I’ll tell you exactly what this “guy language” means so that you know how to confidently respond to this message…
Get 9 Copy-and-Paste Messages That Make the Right Guy Try.
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The following is based off of a real text exchange.
Many of you know we have an entire membership program where people every month on webinars with me get to ask questions.
Well, I had one member who said that she had been seeing a guy for a few months who wouldn’t make plans with her in advance. She finally got around to sending him this message:
Hey, I like you and I feel we have a great chemistry, but I don’t really have a clear understanding of your intentions. I’m not really sure where we stand in our relationship and I don’t get the impression that you’re open to something more meaningful in the way that I am.
Not bad, right? Here was his response:
Hey, totally hear what you’re saying. I’m sorry if I’ve been creating confusion in any way. Things are a little crazy at the moment. I’m figuring things out right now and I’m taking to heart what you said. Hope you had a great week and you’re enjoying your evening.
Fair enough, eh? Seems reasonable. A well-lettered response. Except, he didn’t answer sh*t…
He did the politician thing. He said, “I hear you. You know, you… you’re really giving me something to think about. What you’re saying, I’m hearing.”
This is a wonderful exercise in maintaining confusion.
Now, why would a guy create more confusion?
Because if he gave her enough of an answer for her to say, “You know what? Screw this. I appreciate your honesty, but I can’t do this anymore.”
Then he would lose the option altogether. That door wouldn’t be open for him three weeks from now on Friday night when he wants to fire off a little message after his second beer.
Beer number three, I love you.
So instead, he gives her just enough ambiguity that he can leave the door open for himself. Now she can go and obsess over what his answer means.
The guy for you, the guy you want to be with, is not going to give you an answer that you have to obsess over and analyze and play detective with to get closure. He’s not gonna do that. Anyone who is certain about you is not going to want to leave you in any doubt about that.
Why? Because he doesn’t want to risk you going out on a date with Chad on Friday. He wants you to know he wants to take it somewhere. That ambiguity is all the certainty you need about what you should do next.
So look, here’s what I want you to remember from this video:
Trying is trying, is trying, is trying, is trying, is trying, is trying.
You know trying when you see it. It takes the form of someone saying, “Hey, I want to see you again. Hey, I really like you. Hey, I’d like to go out with you. I don’t want us to see other people.” Trying is trying. And when you get something that feels a little bit too confusing, it’s probably because someone is avoiding telling you the thing that would shut the door on you completely, but doesn’t want to invite you into their life in the way that you actually want.
So remember… trying is trying, is trying, is trying.