Why You Should Be More Like Kanye West

Don’t you wish you cared a little less about what other people think?

I often say in my events and seminars that ‘99% of people live their lives determined by the thoughts of strangers’, and for this week’s video I’ve done something a bit different…

I take you behind the curtain of mine and Jameson’s strategy for these weekly videos, I share a lesson on how to stand strong behind your opinions, and we give a practical takeaway to stop caring about what other people think immediately.

Don’t be afraid to innovate. Don’t be confined to one thing. Give yourself the space to manoeuvre, and try different things within your personality.

Challenge: Next time you go out, can you go the entire time without getting into the subject of your work? (or whatever it might be you usually latch onto in conversation)

Take a risk and challenge yourself by testing the limits of your own charisma and confidence.


If you like this kind of “irrelevant sh*t” – not explicit love life advice – let me know in the comments below! I’d love to hear what you made of this one, and how it helps you push the bounds of your personality.

96 Responses to Why You Should Be More Like Kanye West

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  1. Veronika says:

    Great Video!
    Innovation, expansion, creativity, being yourself all those things take a lot of practices, dedication and focus. Eventually, when we see results by expanding and getting what we initially only dreamed about we experience the best days of our lives!!! Totally, all those things are worth living!!!

    Best Wishes,

  2. Paula Sanders says:

    Ok…correction to my comment a moment ago…Meant to say…”what You had to say made a lot of sense”!:)

    Keep on keepin it real Kanye;)

  3. Paula Sanders says:

    Hahaha…i love it! Wish I’d seen this earlier! Your. Kanye West impersonation was very cute and funny:)! As always, what had to say made alot of sense! And yes… i actually do like irrelevant shit at times:))!!! Lol…

    Literally Laughed out loud,

  4. Allison says:

    Matt your doing great. Your videos are awesome and always leave me inspired even the more random ones ;) they actually validate, for me, your opinion on relationships and life because you are able to show that you are a well rounded person and not selling a quick fix.

    KEEP IT UP Mr. West!

  5. Sigrid von Senger says:

    Hi Matt,

    I think the reason that your book, blog, videos and everything you have a hand in are so spot on, is because you have far reaching interests and an expansive mind. If you were focused solely on dating the whole time, your work would be very shallow and probably resemble some of those unhelpful dating rule books from the 80’s and 90’s.
    You obviously have a lot of talent and wide ranging interests so I completely agree with you stretching out your gaze and avoiding becoming pigeonholed. Keep it up bro. I’m always intrigued by your point of view.

  6. Eleel says:

    Keep on doing these types of videos as well, please. People need to listen more stuff like that… the end of the this particular one was hell of a good fun to listen to.. thank you for sharing part of your honest best-self on-line as well.. Cheers.. e

  7. Iysha says:

    Great video, great content! x

  8. Smeeta says:


    I LOVE that you are sharing your journey with us and SHOWING bravery by demonstrating and not just telling us to be. It takes guts to share those comments which were brutal but you made them part of the journey.

    Speaking of bravery and not begin boxed in, might want to consider another URL :) as you expand your own boundaries.

    I LOVE it!

    P.S. Excited for whats to come July 31.

  9. mq says:

    so… you don’t care about the comments? unless is something nice said?

  10. Jennifer Adam says:

    The first thing I wanted to find out is your astrological sign and you are a Gemini, a MUTABLE sign. I can really relate to that as I am a Sagittarius (another mutable sign). Creativity/innovation expand your knowledge and forces you to stop with the same old same old. And also I love when I am learning something new from someone else. You are bringing a different kick to your videos, that is great.I love exploring whether it is a drink, a food, a place, even a person hahaha….. So yeah explore one’s personality and see how far you can go with it. I went far, very far…………and I am happy with the way I behaved – I felt totally connected with myself. And I think that is a very important aspect.

  11. Hannah Opst says:

    I really like your “shit” videos. One of my good friends told me that before I should worry about finding love that I need to love myself and love my life first. I think your videos that stray away from the usual ones help me to challenge myself to create a life where I am challenged to change and to push myself to use my potential. When I do those things with my life I am happier and feel better about myself and how I am living, and I think that kind of feeling from within a person radiates around them. I know I’m attracted to people like that so hopefully people will be attracted to me. In other words, when I’m doing me, I think it will make other people want to do me too. Lol

    • Brooke Colwell says:

      @ the last line: LOL literally, thanks. Not to be lesbian (bless their gay hearts) but that made you totally doable to me. ;)

  12. Shev says:

    Hi Matt:
    Love the subject of this video!! It really brought home something I learned at the beginning of this Summer and how family and close colleagues viewed me as sweet and “nice”. Someone who is a bit shy and would rarely rock the boat.
    Only a handful of people have seen other sides of my personality – funny, cheeky, witty or intellectual. I have begun to try to show other facets of my personality, with a good response so far, and after this video, I am inspired to expand that effort .
    Want to thank you for focusing on other areas of self development and growth and not limiting yourself to relationship advice. Keep up the amazing work!
    Warmest Regards,
    Shev x

    • Matthew Hussey says:

      I always want to bring you the best of my brother and I’s knowledge in every area, so don’t worry, we’ll keep it coming!

      Matthew x

  13. Christine says:


    It’s not irrelevant sh*t!!! This can most definitely be applied to my love life, or any other area of my life. I love all of your videos, and I think it’s great that you branch out and talk about other subjects. We’re getting to know you through your blog and I personally love it!!!


  14. Hannah says:

    Great video thank you!

  15. Teri White says:

    You inspire me, Matt. You’re incredibly creative…and keeps me on my toes. I’m difficult to impress. X

  16. Rose M says:

    I am not a particular fan of Kanye West, but the context in which you used hi was great. I think it also follows your program of believing in yourself , going outside your comfort zone, and living YOUR life .

  17. Erin says:

    Hi Matt!

    I agree with having the space to show different personality facets!

    I really like the variety of videos you have been posting. While the dating tips are helpful and I enjoy those videos, my favorites are the videos that discuss self-improvement and enhancing oneself/one’s life. Please keep them coming!


  18. Clare Turner-Marshall says:

    Awesome video! Love the honesty and fab tips! First time I saw your stuff and it’s fabulous! Stay cool ;)

  19. M says:

    I actually think that choosing Kanye West as an example was a good move – because it somehow was picked from a peculiar side of the spectrum AND was valid. (Bare with me this time.)

    (Knowing that “x” applies to paradigm cases and “x” is “being innovative”)
    When using a non-paradigm case e.g. K.W., to demonstrate that “x” applies, it shows that “x” applies to more than just to common cases e.g. Pink Floyd -safe guess? :p

    In other words, there are more innovative people out there than one might think, be aware of or would like to agree with, regardless of whether they are or are not perceived as popular by you or anyone else. Being innovative isn’t solely the privilege of our favorite artist.

    It’s almost as if Matt has used opposite analogies such as pepper and salt but chose to mention the pepper leaving it open for the audience to pick their salt.
    Hence, I’d like to think that mentioning K.W. serves (amongst other things) to expand peoples perception of the existing variety of innovative individuals.

    It’s more than just about Matt making a valid point, it’s about illustrating that the point he made applies also to the “other” side of the spectrum – in this case it was from the West side.
    Would you have preferred “Far East Movement”?

    Last but not least, “there’s no accounting for taste.” :)

    P.S.: Even a brownie from you Matt won’t make me hit the *replay* button on KW. ;)

  20. Kim McMaster says:

    Excellent insightful video!

  21. martina says:

    I like it. I like all videos about personal grow. Keep doing it pls. It helps a lot!

  22. Allison says:

    This is wonderful advice!!! I did this in my life in a big way… I was always the one to avoid danger, or anything that I might get hurt by. So I challenged myself and I went skydiving! Since doing this I have challenged myself in other ways, including strength training. And at the age of 40 I was able to do a “full clean”! Something I would NEVER have thought I would be able to do, or would ever want to do! Let alone at the age of 40! We are capable of SO MUCH!! We just have to have the courage to explore! Thank you Matt for all of your wonderful insights!!! Keep being the magnificent person you are! :)

  23. Amina says:

    The comments you mention at the beginning of the video are thoughtful comments from people who truly appreciate and admire your work. Why so much anger at the few who dared express an opinion that was not only theirs? Not everyone writes comments, and few dare to criticize. I for one agree with some points in those comments.

    Maybe those comments hurt cause they are not from trolls? Maybe you’re just now getting used to negative comments from fans? Either way, a 15 minute video response and the angry tone and mocking of someone’s use of ellipsis(cause it’s okay for you to criticize someone in a rude way) only prove that you care too much about such comments.

    Well, really, nobody gets 100% approval, it’s absolutely and sometimes it’s good to pay attention to criticism. You don’t have to agree with it, but sometimes it’s good to “listen” without feeling hurt. It’s not about you, it’s not about your work as a whole, it’s just about one video. Hope you feel better soon and learn to deal better with criticism that is meant to be constructive, even if you don’t think it is or if you don’t agree with it.

  24. Amy says:

    Brilliant video Matt, really resinated with me, thanks, has given me the kick up the butt I needed to stop being the person everyone expects me to be. :)

  25. Neaam Alhaseny says:

    LOVE IT! Deep to the core Mr Hussey. Keep it up, its nice to see that other side.

  26. Becky says:

    You’re so motivational that it should be illegal.

  27. Viki says:

    Hi Matt,

    I loved it, thank you so much for caring with us :) it makes me feel so good that I’m not alone with my questions.


  28. Kiara says:

    I really liked this video and the points you were making about trying to live outside the boxes we have built for ourselves, and our lives. I don’t like Kanye West or his music. Though I do respect him for having more confidence then most, and for speaking alot of truth, minus the crazy. Now I do find that his affiliations with the Kardashians makes him seem hypocritical at times, but in this interview I think he makes some very valid points: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=8dV2QWRXrUI

    I was still pissed though that his interview went on for so long, that it cut off the Arctic Monkeys’ performance! Ha!

    Thanks for being the mom to my Kanye West LOL

  29. Claire says:

    Awesome metaphors! I feel like this sentiment is happening with me. Lately Ive been feeling like throwing caution to the wind! Away with others preconceived social mores!

    Ultimately I’ve reflected on it to find that the judgement and negativity is others to bear. Its actually a thrill to challenge others and remain polite doing so. Making sure that I stand up for what I believe has validated everything I believe at an exponential rate.

    I highly recommend doing this.

    Control is problematic, I dont mind organization and precision, but please don’t even try to impose on someone else. This is why I relate to this video and feel super passionate about it, we have to learn to stand up for ourselves because control is am illusion amd the more we do this, the weaker the illusion is.

    I think the major caveat Ive noticed is that in creating space for yourself, making this space an exclusive one is counterproductive and contradictory. Like people who express themselves in the form of rediculous slang and overuse inside jokes in a public setting. People feeling “free” to do this are not actually conducting themselves in a very “free” and open way at all.

    Now I’m just going to highlight a recent example from my own life: I was at a party and said something that someone I didn’t really know well snickered at because apparently its a definition on urban dictionary, something lewd but also quite obscure for a dirty word. Anyways given the context I felt that such an undignified comment wasnt a good way to respond. Even though I can share in a laugh about basically anything, I felt compelled to say that urban dictionary really is contributing nothing spectacular to society and should not be taken with any real authority. My point being that using urban dictionary does not improve you as a person, so why bring this up as if you’re contriubting something meaningful to the conversation… –oooh did you notice the perfect triad ellipses?!?! I love the word ellipses. Anyways.

    In conclusion for the sake of creating a space for myself so that people who I feel have been rude or obnoxious to me and don’t dominate with dirty jokes as well as to misalign my pure intentions I did and will continue to take a stand. At the same time, from their perspective, I could see how they might be a bit miffed, wanting to have some validation in the sharing of a joke, but I will not betray myself and my feelings when it is an effort of great contention to make sense of the thoughts and emotional reactions going on in my own head/heart in light of such interpersonal events. “You can’t hide your light under a bushel” is good advice I got from a friend once and also why Ifelt compelled to share my reaction to the video. Although I’m feeling loquacious at the moment I want to shortly and sweetly express my gratitude to Matthew and his crew for the great work they do! I like the out of the box thinking going on here. Keep it up and much love!!

  30. Mj says:

    I do appreciate the different expanded topics. I am all into self improvement. In a way, a stronger more diversified creation of oneself is very desirable to men. I was curious how others views this video. I share agreement with both sides of the coin. I think women who visit this sight are craving for relationship advise. This is why we visit every week to continue being a better dater or better person in a relationship. I think if you do expand to other topics then you need to make two different sites. I do really hope you continue to give dating advise and not lose interest in it. So many women including myself need it. I would visit both sites if you choose to make 2 different sites that include self help tips and dating tips.

  31. Theresa says:

    Matthew, I like the variety of video concepts you put out each week. Keep up your remarkable work you’re doing. I totally get what you’re saying about being true to oneself and not conforming to what others think is acceptable. You sure are a fan of Kanye West but I don’t know much about his music. Some of the resistance maybe stemming from the fact that Kanye’s personality is not exactly relished.

  32. Nichole says:

    You almost lost me at the beginning with the celebrities you talk about this week. I do not listen to their music BECAUSE I dislike their personalities THAT much (pompous asses in my opinion). I do appreciate your message though. When I was younger I was not really “allowed” to be mad or angry when it came to my family. They saw me as happy-go-lucky and good natured. It took me a long time feeling comfortable being mad in front of them, feeling like it was okay for me to be upset about anything. I try not to be that upset about life because anger doesn’t solve problems but now I know I have family that supports me!

  33. Amrew says:

    Great video this week Matt! I’m a big Kanye fan and felt the exact same way you did when he put out those albums, and like you have a tremendous respect for him. I’m in a similar position right now. I’m a DJ and people are used to hearing me play a certain style but I want to expand and play a completely different style. I was worried about people’s reaction but I’m ready to innovate and expand. I’m thankful to be in good company with you ;-)

  34. G says:

    I had no problems w your “other” videos and your desire to expand yourself and us. What I hope you eventually expand to is: how to keep the guy. Also, as an “oldah” gal, I don’t always feel like your topics apply to me.

    Still will watch, of course.

  35. Pam Q says:

    Graffiti is pointless and stupid for 99.9% of the population. It was a great video and I very much enjoyed it! Thanks for taking the risk in pointing out this sad and destructive pastime.

  36. Stephanie says:

    I love that you are now adding life advice! Keep the relationship ones too though! But I like how you “shake us” sometimes!

  37. Isabella says:

    I think you received so much criticism about that video because there are women maybe men who hang on to your every word and look forward to you weekly videos expecting the next one to be the best tips you’ve ever given and to bag themselves a guy. Due to the content not being relevant they felt shafted in someway haha.
    I love your personality Matthew and always enjoy your tips and your insight, I haven’t bagged myself a man yet but have learnt so much from you, from words i don’t normally use, more confidence within myself and what i have to offer. I’m actually putting myself out there and trying new things.
    everyone is entitled to their opinions at the end of the day.

    long winded i know, but wanted you to know that you are appreciated.

    Isabella x

  38. Swetty says:

    Remember the video “Get The Guy In 9 Foolproof Steps”?
    I expected you to be serious! It’s like I wasn’t listening for the first half of that video.
    But it was still funny, I enjoyed it.
    And I like to see different parts of your personality.
    Keep it up!

  39. Vicki says:

    As Dr. Brene Brown said in her TED Talk, “If you’re not also in the arena and getting your ass kicked, I don’t want to hear what you have to say.” And she quoted Theodore Roosevelt as her inspiration in response to a lot of irrelevant criticism:

    “It is not the critic who counts, nor the man who points how the strong man stumbled or where the doer of deeds could have done them better. The credit belongs to the man who is actually in the arena; whose face is marred by dust and sweat and blood; who strives valiantly…who knows the great enthusiasms, the great devotions, and spends himself in a worthy cause; who, at best, knows the triumph of high achievement; and who, at the worst, if he fails, at least fails while daring greatly, so that his place shall never be with those cold and timid souls who know neither victory nor defeat.”
    Theodore Roosevelt, 1910

    I admire you Matthew, for standing in the arena with the ability to deflect your critics with humor and a grain of salt. I value your advice and insight in other areas of my life besides romance. You can’t have a successful relationship without being a well-rounded person. I can say that if I hadn’t taken risks, I wouldn’t have endured all the criticism and embarrassment I have, but I wouldn’t have accomplished much in my life, either. Another word of advice, probably from somebody’s mother: “The birds always peck at the best fruit.”

  40. Rose Perrone says:

    This video misunderstands personality change. We haven’t developed habits of personality because we want to fit people’s expectations. Kanye West is not immune to people-pleasing.

    This takes some explaining.

    We can’t trust our feelings. Feelings are how our brains summarize tons of incoming data to steer our actions. But our brains have an evolutionary bias to resist hardship and danger. An example of perceived hardship is getting out of bed rather than hitting the snooze button. An example of perceived danger is talking to group of strangers. Our brains produce negative thoughts and fear to project a false sense of our personal limits. Even on a scientific level, our muscles feel fatigued long before they actually run out of energy. We have overeager defense systems designed to protect us from stepping into risky situations.

    The real work of personality change is noticing the thoughts and feelings that keep us from getting what we want, and defying them by taking action on creative impulses. Kanye West said, “Creative output, you know, is just pain. I’m going to be cliche for a minute and say that great art comes from pain.”

  41. Paula says:

    Thanks for quoting my comment first in your video!

    • JCee says:

      Um, really?

      Think you quite missed the point of the entire
      video. Stellar insite Paula ;)

      Fellow Gemini (like Kanye and Matt)

      • Angela says:

        Don’t attack her because her opinion differs from yours. This isn’t some cult wherein anyone who dares have an opinion other than “Oh, Matt…you’re the greatest!” has to be pounced on.

        You – missed her point.

  42. A. says:

    Great video! I’m up for the challenge you and Jameson set for yourselves. What have we got to lose to develop other aspects of ourselves?

  43. Angela says:

    I like your video, hate Kanye West’s music. Watching his video with Kim bouncing up and down, topless, on the dash of his motorcycle – was painful.

  44. Faith says:

    Matt Hussey: You vandalized my ass. Yes the ellipsis… We enjoy your shit Matt…

    Rock on!!

    I enjoy you being a person and bringing many different perspectives to life. You’re not just a LOVE GURU.

    Happy Sunday mate!!

  45. Emilie says:

    I think what you do and how you change gives you more creditability to your coaching. Thanks Matt!

  46. Mary says:

    Hey Matt

    The title of the video got my attention. It felt like a clarification of the earlier video on graffiti, loved the message nonetheless.

    Thank You!

  47. Tiffany says:

    Oh Matthew, you dangerous man, you. I adore that you are a whole person. I admire that you step out in utter freedom of this human experience and use your entire set of tools to communicate, teach, entertain and surprise the world. Don’t ever stop.

    As a woman in her mid 40’s I feel fortunate to have grown up in a society that embraced the ‘non-critical’. You would have to be face to face with that person who wanted to squash your ‘new way of being’ instead of being anonymous on the internet. I am so grateful for that time.

    I worry that our modern culture has forgotten the appeal and power of the Renaissance Man — celebrating the many facets and talents of one human being — being able to conquer and strive for any piece of knowledge that strikes your fancy — to shock and awe — to delight the world through surprise, wit and the unexpected. A well rounded, multi-faceted, fearless human being is among the most stunning creatures on earth.

    Keep on keeping’ on, Mr. Hussey. I count myself honored to be privy to your new and excited ways. You are a beautiful man.

    Tiffany xx

  48. Fifi says:

    Dear Matthew,

    Completely agree with you, and love any “irrelevant” shit you post #notsoirrelevanttolife

    Thank you for everything.

    P.S. so proud of your success and the community you have built

  49. Ashley says:

    Love it! I appreciate you and your work because you press beyond love life and relationships and speak to the whole of an individual. If we only focus on that one part of ourselves, we miss the bigger picture.

  50. Linda MacKenzie says:

    Matt, I can’t believe you read my comment in your video! Regardless of your criticism of my multiple elliptical periods (really?) I feel like my point was taken. That is: this video, although not directly about “Getting/Keeping the Guy”, it is indirectly related. So, you let the pendulum swing back a bit. Thank you.

  51. Hidz says:

    Dear Matthew,
    I have a question, how do you keep your daily motivation at the optimum level? I understand that some of the comments from others (previous video) hurt you somehow- before you injected the strength back in you. I am curious how do you keeps yourself motivated? Thanks for sharing Matthew, I know now that you don’t give a crap much about what others think of you as long as you know that you are doing your thing right. :) have a good day.

  52. Feebee says:

    I love all your videos, Matt. The advice/tips are always so simple, but yet profound because you express/explain it well in a way that make sense. A lot of it is common sense but we tend to forget. Your videos are great reminders for people to better themselves. Not only are your videos informative, helpful but also very entertaining :)

  53. Sarah says:

    Favorite video thus far! I sometimes get hung up on the idea of trying to establish a single ‘high value’ self–multifaceted, the way both you and Stephen encourage your audience to demonstrate–but still a single, fixed, go-to self to aspire to, as though that identity is something that can be achieved and finalized. I think this is a really crucial complement to everything that is already so powerful about the high value woman framework, because it accommodates both self-acceptance and growth & change. Nice work.

  54. Maradoll says:

    This is so valuable. I feel there are so many concepts that are extraneous to the subject of finding love (such as believing in yourself, having courage…figuring out how to use your energy vs. bad uses of energy, laughing at the world, etc.) that without them, a much more well-rounded, comprehensive and valuable lesson in attaining quality relationships and better love lives would be lost! I trust your knowledge, experience and professionalism, Matt ~ that’s why I’m here in the first place. P.S. Thanks for your generosity in throwing out confessions and lessons you’ve learned in your own life to share with others who can use them in their own lives…xo

  55. Angelica says:

    I am a huge fan of yours Matt!! I can’t help but appreciate this video and how you always share such valuable information to help better the many different aspects of life.
    You are very Gorgeous and Entertaining too I might add :)

  56. Monika says:

    Matt :) What you conveyed in today’s video is epically brilliant! I actually admire people who dare to challenge themselves by looking at various angles they can show themselves and then if that change can serve or help somebody else in turn, that is even better!

    You are an inspiring human being indeed, Matt!

    So grateful for your work.

  57. christine ford says:

    vandalized my A$$. You’re sooo funny.

  58. Linda says:

    I don’t know anything about Kanye West except his marriage to Kim, and frankly I don’t care – I have no interest in him; however, I LOVE listening to you, Matt, and I agree 100% with the bottom line point of your video. It doesn’t matter who you choose, someone will always disagree or disapprove, and isn’t that the whole point? Who cares? We all have a right to express ourselves for who we are, and if people don’t like it, so what?

    I love ALL your videos, and I agree with what you said about the graffiti. I’m impressed, actually, that a man your age (younger than me) has such solid, meaningful values.

    Keep it up, Matt – everything you do! You’re doing just fine, no matter what any critics may say.

  59. Pauline says:

    loved that graffiti video! people took notice as i had it up on my page… same with the not gossiping one Matt! BRILLIANCE!!!

  60. ASLI ERDEMLI says:

    Just to let you know, I love your impact on me ;)

  61. Kat says:

    Nuff Respec, Matt… Spot-on and fun to watch as ever so innovations encouraged.. and maybe a little cameo from Jameson some day? ;-)

  62. Rachelle says:

    totally agree with you Matt

  63. Leecis says:

    A new way to teach me growth skills.
    Also loved the “grafetti rant”. It showed your love of learning. You find a lesson in even the most obscure.

  64. tigress866 says:

    Hiya Matt…

    It’s magnificent to see bloopers and seeing you laugh at yourself while filming! That speaks as much volume as your main point and I love it when people do that.

    It feels as though I could just walk in, take my shoes off, and have a laugh with you over tea. The best thing is empassioned opinions in a conversation, whether you agree or not, an animated conversation is the most memorable.

    Alas, though, I am left with a burning question. Would you perhaps allow me to violate your right butt cheek? I DO think I am pretty good with a sharpie. Just ask my Mom!! ;) LMAO

  65. Patience says:

    Matthew Hussey I just have to come out and say it,you are absolutely brilliant! I LOVE the way your mind works ,you are one hell of a man and I admire your confidence and intelligence and your ability to push boundaries .You certainly bring other people well good reasons to live life to the fullest and the most extraordinarily ,yes you do have to respect Kanye a little bit,there is something about him that you can’t help but admire a little beyond all that madness :)

  66. inez says:

    I’ve been a massive sting since i was 14 and I’m now 40- he a total inspiration of a person who stays true to himself – very gutsy. And i shall listen to him more to be more myself.. happy true days..!

  67. Sam says:

    Great video… but the last lines, the Kanye West thing, really more than classic :D :P

  68. Teresa says:

    Matt, I have only grown to like you more as your videos have become more opinionated (mostly because I agree with all your opinions!), and I like nothing more than a Hussey rant! In fact, I think like your non-dating videos more, because they are so specific yet universal and are always a balm to my own value system, which frequently feels battered and bruised by the world in general.
    It’s true that though I think Kanye West is mad, I do have an appreciation for anybody who cares so little what people think, much like when I see someone walking in the street and just singing aloud – I envy that level of liberation.
    Please keep doing what you do Matthew, you are an oasis of kindness, wisdom and inspiration in an often nonsensical, frustrating world.

  69. Elikolani says:

    I totally agree with you.I stopped being the person people want me to be. It’s not easy but I feel more comfortable in my own skin. By the way Matt, I think your irrelevant shit is very important. Life is not only about finding love, the human being has so many goals in life. We are not 1- dimensional,I love to express myself and your challenges/ videos are so helpful. I admire Kanye West for his confindence and his bravery. I love his music , especially the new stuff. He maintains an opinion and is very passionate about his work, I can feel this passion on every piece he puts out.

    Love to you from Germany

    P.S. nice qoute x loved the video ‘What he said to me made my day’

  70. Margot says:

    Classic Matt = Matt in a tux. Wear one next time, please?

  71. Em says:

    Personally I love your videos that aren’t just from a love perspective without them you would risk be seeing as a clichéd love/relationship coach (albeit a brilliant one) but actually these videos show me you’re insights extended in to all areas of life. Which actually I think people are neglecting to see the valuable side of, it’s okay winning a guy over in a date and being able to get a guy to text you back but it’s just a façade if you’re life’s not on track or if you’re not emotionally stable and people will see through it eventually.

    My thing is at work people feel I’m really serious hard working and shy so I love to shock people with a dirty joke or innuendo – it’s a bit Carry On.. but I love people’s faces when I do it when they see this side of me they don’t know.

  72. sacha says:

    Haters always gunna hate. Whatever. Where’s their influence and success?

    That’s what I thought.

    Anyway, totally gunna use your advice and throw some change out there tomorrow at work. I’m gunna take a risk and talk to my crush about non-work related things and actually flirt with him. If he isn’t interested at least I’ll get some practice with talking to cute guys and I’ll be able to set my sights elsewhere… After lots of crying and ice cream and movies about girls killing bad guys. Those always make me feel better.

  73. Tine says:

    “Imperfection is beauty, madness is genius and it’s better to be absolutely ridiculous than absolutely boring.” Marilyn Monroe


  74. Lauren Elliott says:

    P.S. Come visit us out in Aspen, Colorado! I think you need to push your boundaries physically and skiing will definitely to that! Plus, these
    mountain men desperately need your help! They are sexy…Mhmmm…with that scruff and all, but their words just kill the attraction! Come rescue the “1 woman for every 10 men” population out here from these beasts! Hahaha. You would knock em’ all dead in their completion for that 1 woman. ;) Love to you from the Valley!

  75. Lauren Elliott says:

    Matt, please keep the irrevelant shit coming! I am a similar age as you and I feel like we’re growing up together! Haha. Much of your transformation has been my transformation and I really enjoy watching your videos because you clarify so many of the ideas that had been on my mind at that time and apply a practical application to practice. These videos are authentic, and a little jagged around the edges and we love them! Keep up the good work both of you! Can’t wait to push my own boundaries as you push yours! I think we can handle ALL of you just fine. ;)

  76. Alissa says:

    Nice rant. Made no sense just like Kanye. I can see why you’re a fan. Kanye is not brave, he is just crazy. It’s his narcissistic insanity that drives him to create and make strange choices like marrying the vacuous KK. Of all the people to idolize and be a fan of, it speaks volumes that you pick him.

    • Kathryn says:

      It does speak volumes,but not for the reasons you mention. Like Matt, Kanye is a creative genius and yes it is brave to try out different aspects of your personality, ones outside of your normal, easy, comfort zone ‘this is me’ because you have to risk the reactions of the people that know you like that. It’s brave to risk feeling ridiculed or derised or criticised as we mostly do try to please and remain safe not open and vulnerable. But people are going to like it or not, be with you or not and it’s the only way to grow and change in a really positive way.
      Behind Matt and Kanye are a great intellect and I think Kanye and his wife are a perfect fit. She’s a lot more than people give her credit for and she makes him happy. She’s given him a beautiful family and they are a team.
      I have such a good rapport with my hairdresser. He’ll say be a gypsy one day and I’ll be whatever I felt like, a sexy French actress, whatever. We love each other’s creativity and charisma, but it was a comment he said that made me think about taking it one step further to be creative with my personality. I’ve only just started and on a day out with people I know from music lessons, I felt I was becoming the entertainment for the day. So this is going to be an interesting process.
      I love this type of content, please keep going with it. We are seeing you in a new light, and we like it!
      Kathryn x

  77. Delilah v says:

    LOL the ending was brilliant!

    Growth is constant and the most beautiful aspect of our world, I enjoy you challenging us to really step out of our usual box and try something new with our environment.

    People are afraid of criticism. Too used to their comfort zone!

  78. Liz says:

    Brilliant. Much food for thought this morning, thanks Matthew, Liz

  79. Kelli Woods says:

    This made me think of a quote I recently found that is giving me a lot to think about in regards to how I want to live my life:

    “Don’t live the same year 75 times and call it a life.” ~Robin Sharma

    Here’s to 75 (plus!) different years :)


  80. Jill says:

    Ok just finished the video and I can’t lie I really wish you could have picked someone else to admire but that’s life ;) I do have to say when I hear what you say I try to apply it to my life and I have to say I’m pretty darn good at keeping people on their toes.
    Your butt cheek…really;) oh and to that person who said its teenagers expressing themselves I wonder what their reaction would be if some one painted the word JESUS on your building…just sayin

  81. Soph says:

    YES! I frickin love Kanye!! Ok I’ll calm down now and actually watch the video :-)

  82. Jill says:

    No lie I was just thinking about that video and how
    I didn’t like the title. Just sounds a little too freaky and let’s be honest you totally knew what people would think when they heard it.

  83. Marisol says:

    Matthew, my love, I must admit I was afraid of opening this link after I read the headline. Now you got me all “Yeah, Kanye West!!!”

    Which, for an opera singer, is quite something.

    By the way, I’m totally going to use that Kanye quote on my next date. I’ll let you know how it went XD

  84. Dominique says:

    Hi Matt,

    Love your videos and insights.
    Thanks for sharing your love and light with the world. You inspire us all to be the BEST version of ourselves.

    Much love and gratitude always

  85. Rivka says:

    Hi :)
    I actually liked your prior video. Liked it a lot.
    But I happened to write a stupid comment.
    As is too easy on the internet.

  86. Sian Lewis says:

    Wonderful! I love watching your old and new videos. Thanks for being brave enough to let the public watch you develop and grow over the years. I can’t wait to see how you change when you get married and have children.

    By the way, when America loses its charm and you want a new challenge, the way men and women relate to each other in Eastern Europe would fascinate you. Translation is a hassle, but when you are ready, please branch out and work with a greater variety of cultures. Thank you Sian

  87. Lynn says:

    Love it when you posts videos like this!!! When are you going to launch the other site – Get The Life??

    Really looking forward to it :)

  88. Nikki says:


    I love it!! Especially the takes at the end :)
    I love that you set new standards and goals for yourself and pass them on.
    Love the vids… Keep up the amazing work :)

    In Gratitude

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