3 Tricks To Do Anything You Want

Is there something you’ve been wanting to do but are worried what other people may think of you?

A trip away? A new hairstyle? A new hobby?

In this week’s video, I give you 3 tricks to help you from having other people’s opinions hold you back. Enjoy!

9 Texts No Man Can Resist

154 Responses to 3 Tricks To Do Anything You Want

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  1. Tayisiya Kugle says:

    You mentioned in the video that you’d like us to share our experiences when we wanted to do something and we’re judged for it.
    I discovered an education program called micro masters and several of my co-workers started making fun of it when I was trying to share something exciting with my peers. They kept laughing and saying, “I’d rather get macro masters degree than micro. Haha!” I was so happy about his program and couldn’t wait to share it with them just to be ignored and laughed at and not even in a direct way. It hurt but I kept quiet. I felt like saying anything in that moment would have shown too much of my emotion and how they hurt me.
    I don’t think i handled it right but after watching you video, i will not let that throw me off again. I want to be in control of how I feel. I don’t want ignorant people making me feel less than I really am.

  2. Lydia says:

    Thank you for the great advice. You’ve been an inspiration to me for the past 2 years.
    I took a big step into the unknown 3 years ago and got a divorce after 28 years of marriage. And I’m so happy that I did it. But I’ve gotten a lot of grief about it from family – particularly my grown children. One would think they would understand, since I’d stayed married for my kids. But they don’t like seeing me happy and their father unhappy.
    I’ve followed your first tip and embraced who I am. Hopefully I can use the other tips soon. Thank you Matthew!

  3. Joanna says:

    Good idea, I like it ! I will try

  4. Jamie says:

    As usual, great advice, Matthew. I read “Get the Guy” and have watched countless videos on YouTube. I love that this video in particular was not necessarily relationship related. You have a wealth of knowledge and I appreciate your honesty on all topics. All of your advice is brilliant because it’s easy to relate to and requires small steps. Nothing is too mind blowing that would hinder anyone from being able to accomplish anything you’ve set out.

    I went through a break up over the holiday season and watching your videos was a HUGE reason why I was able to move forward, little by little, day by day. I’ve learned that being a positive person, enjoying my life, living it to the fullest, doing things for myself goes a VERY long way.

    Keep up the great work! And I’ll keep watching your videos as you post :)

  5. Ana Garcia says:

    Mr. Hussey, you are a real blessing!! Your energy and the tips you share can be viewed as coming from the heart! Besides your natural beauty as a person on the outside you can see that it truly comes from within your Spirit! Please keep the videos coming and God Speed…Amen!

    I have started not caring what people think about me and my choices…I am a grown woman who knows right from wrong and am moving forward with sharing myself in a good clean loving way with people and am open and receptive to positivity. When negativity comes my way I accept it and move on from it and learn what I can from that scenario. Your videos have helped keep me on my life journey to not give up on Love but rather to be prepared, because IT’S coming, I can feel it and it’s exciting! I’m looking forward to meeting some great people and learning to except them as they are and if they aren’t supposed to remain in my life then I simply acknowledge that I had something to learn and gain from it and keep moving forward loving, and even loving the unlovable…many blessings to you and your Blog…I will copy and paste this message as I am at work and my lunch break is about over.

  6. Malar says:

    While i know some people in the city that i live in. I don’t have friends / boy friend that accompanies me to every activity – eating out, movies, concerts and stuff. I end up trying out some of these on by myself. Sometimes, i feel very conscious that i am there at that place, alone, while most people have Company. Any thoughts. Am i perpetuating the ‘singledom’? Some people always seem to have a group to do their things.

  7. Sanni says:

    Hi Matthew,
    I just wanted to thank you for this video. This will help me dealing with my current problem.
    I am studying in a college right now, but I want to quit and start a new study in another country. I am 20 years old and I feel the urge to get proactive, get out there and experience life differently.
    But my uncle is against my wishes and wants me to stay. He says it would be foolish, because I would even leave my current job.
    For me, my last year was a very hard and challenging time. My intuition is telling me for over four years to move on from my current place. I believe the most important issue in this case would be the money.
    Maybe you could give me a short answer about whether it is okay to take the risk in this life phase or to stay.
    Thank you, you are doing a great job for so many people all around the world, and for me, you are truly a genius.
    Love,
    Sanni

  8. Lu says:

    Though i only recently bought your book, i have been a great fan of your youtube videos since last year. This video particularly went straight to my heart. See, though i want to share my life with a guy, i think i need to love and make my life interesting at first. And that is a tricky thing to do. Especially if you have a close connection with family and friends that sometimes, out of love, direct you to things you really have no fond feelings whatsoever. So next time I wish to learn another foreign language, take a dancing class, or dance in the rain or even take on theater lessons, i hope this three ways you just taught will smooth some critics or rocks thrown on the way. Thank you for your videos! Keep doing your retreats cause one day i hope to be in one… Just for curiosity of course

  9. sandra ramirez says:

    I’m so happy I found you Matt! I just went through a heartbreak and of course it affected me no only in a hurtful way, but it started to lower my self esteem. Listening to speak the truth without sugar coating how things will turn out is what i like to hear. I will continue listening to you. I only needed to hear this one day and you have already changed my life again. Thank you!

  10. Yessamin says:

    I have been criticize by friends, family even teachers because they say the my boyfriend is not that ‘good looking’. I do not really care what they say because for me what ever he may look like I love him the way he is but the thing is he let himself be affected by there comments, he alwats say negative things about himself and is always insecure about my guy friends who I think not that much to be insecure for. How do I change that? like how do I make him feel like comfortable and less insecure… I have tried telling him but it has no effect please help me matt I dont know what to do anymore… thanks

    -Yessamin

  11. Amy Stewart says:

    Love when you use a real example like the retreat.

  12. tigress866 says:

    ❤❤❤ it. Carry on.

  13. Shannon Sand says:

    Matthew, I love listening and reading all your advice. It truly gives people motivation and courage to improve their lives. For YEARS, I have had this feeling and need to go on a trip, similar to the “meditation” trip you discuss in this video. I always was full of excuses for not going; time, money, other people, work, etc., but I finally am going on a trip to Hawaii, by myself this spring. It is a daunting idea when I think about it and even hesitate to tell people, for reasons you discuss. I just feel like it’s one of those thing I need to do in my life to “find myself”, as corny as that sounds. At 30, I think it’s about time though!

  14. Tania Gaitán says:

    I usually pay special atenttion to your advice, since I think it’s been really useful, not only in my love life, but in much more levels of it, and try to thank the time you take sharing your knowledge with us.

    I’ll tell you what I did about your advice on writing down your tips, because I gave it my own twist, and as you said, would like to share it with the entire comunity.

    Once I saw one of your writen videos and thought it would be helpful, in order to remember them, to take some screenshots on the most important parts. I used them like notes (I’m trying to keep notes I used to write on paper digitaly, using Evernote), so that they would be easy to reach, and it actually worked!
    Maybe you can take your videos to another level by making written notes on the screen, listing the points you are talking about, by your side, for example. I think it may help to remark those important words or phrases, while you talk, and those who like to do it could take screenshots and make digital notes about your videos!!! :)

    As I always say, thank you for being so generose.

    Tania
    from Montevideo, Uruguay

  15. Nia says:

    Wow Matt,

    This is really powerful, thank you so much making this video. :-)
    I care a little less what people think then I use to but I have changed my college degree three times and this time I’m not telling my family that I had done so, I kind of feel like I can’t commit to anything but I know it’s right for me this time, my family doesn’t support the fact that I am going to college in the first place, they think it’s a big waste of money. Also, I just want to be able to say, this is what I’m doing with my life like it or not, I love it. I don’t really want anyone to have a say, years ago when I was trying to make a go for, things I wanted, people’s opinion brought me down and I walk away from it all, now I’m going for it again and I just don’t want to hear it.

    Thank you again for this video, I needed it.

  16. kristi says:

    1.Undefined.
    2.Defend-not…
    3.Realigned;)

    “I just don’t care!” The same thing i said when i dyed my hair from dark brown to blonde…well it caused me a lot of trouble and was rejected,abandoned and criticized by many but i never felt more relieved and free after doing that last summer, something i really wanted to try since i was young;) it just really reveals people who are true and are not- it exposes their character, of being religious rather than spiritual.but i still respect their opinion so i colored it black after a month…did it not for them but for those who stick with me in that tough times,so they will not be affected with the conflict ;)but now, i guess i will be dying my hair back again soon.lol in our language we say “wapakels” to express all of the 3;)

  17. kristi says:

    1.Undefined.
    2.Defend-not…
    3.Realigned;)

    “I just don’t care!” The same thing i said when i dyed my hair from dark brown to blonde…well it caused me a lot of trouble and was rejected,abandoned and criticized by many but i never felt more relieved and free after doing that last summer, something i really wanted to try since i was young;) it just really reveals people who are true or are not- it exposes their character, of being religious rather than spiritual.but i still respect their opinion so i colored it black after a month…did it not for them but for those who stick with me in that tough times,so they will not be affected with the conflict ;)but now, i guess i will be dying my hair back again soon.lol in our language we say “wapakels” to express all of the 3;)

  18. N.P. says:

    Hey Matthew!!

    I’ve been a huge fan of yours for some time now and every time I watch your videos I never comment. I decided today would be the day I join this community mostly because you motivated me to but also because I want to start this year off by creating instead of waiting.

    My culture is very restricting in the sense that there are certain things you cannot do. For example, dating isn’t something that sounds convincing to them because it looks bad if people were to see you with a man hanging out outside. They would start assuming things. The problem is I am a logical person and this culture does not agree to reason these standards they uphold and the people judge extremely quickly. But, I have decided that it is my life and I know what it is I want in my future so I don’t care what these people would have to say. The problem arises when you want to bring your dating life closer to home in which case you can’t.

    This has been an issue that I’ve thought a lot about lately and I am still trying to grasp what it is that can solve the puzzle.

    Anyways, thank you for doing what you do! I find you to be a great inspiration and whenever I need to feel like I want to learn something just so I can make a new millimeter shift in my life, I come to your blog..

    Hope you had a very Happy New Years!

    -N.P.

  19. Agata says:

    Hi, as far as I wanted to share quite recent experience of mine I dreamed about attending boxing classes like always and last month i decided finally to sign up and start doing it. I was insecure about people to find out and express their opinion and it was a problem since it’s not like dancing or meditating neutral- it’s rather a male sport so a believed it would take sth from the feminine me in eyes of others when I actually would like to be more feminine than I am now. So I kind of didn’t tell anything about it and train anyway :)

  20. Diana says:

    Great video! Thank you so much Matt!
    I thought of a situation where I cared much about what my friends said, it was last week, someone from our study asked me out and I told them about it and they were like, that ugly guy, you should not go, you should see him when he’s drunk. And I know what they mean but there is something about him that I find very attractive. Nevertheless I decided not to meet him because I care much about what my friends say.
    I don’t know if it was the right decision but I think your advice is very helpful and I can use it for many other situations!

  21. Brenda Richter says:

    Liked this video. Great alternatives to a response v. strongly defending yourself.

  22. Amena Uddin says:

    Hi Matt,
    Just a quick comment to say that I have decided to go ahead and do something that, in the past, I probably wouldn’t have had the confidence to do. I’ve decided to go and stay in Leeds for two nights at the Hilton hotel by myself. The reason being that a) none of my friends were able to take this break with me and b) I really needed a break from home. I think I will still have a good time exploring the city by myself and making use of the hotel facilities. I am however wanting some advice on how to be a good conversationalist when sitting at the hotel bar by myself. I think I have the confidence to strike up a conversation with the bar staff if they are not too busy but where do I go from there? How do I talk to people without coming across like a complete loner?

  23. Rox says:

    Hi, thanks a lot for the ideas, for being to the point, very knowledgeable, and for basically not serving us a mumbo-jumbo type of advice which will make yours truly run the other way. Have to admit I loved the “9 steps to get a guy” tho ;) re this post, what you’re doing is using mental aikido, taking the others’ energy, re-directing it and avoiding conflict. Maybe you knew it already, but it’s worth a deeper look. Rox

  24. Elysa says:

    AS you asked to post a comment, well I do it but be lenient, my english is not perfect ahah (I’m french, I hope someday you’ll come in France and do a conference !).

    Last year I wanted to try something new and I decided to give maths lessons (I’m a student) so I put an ad on the Internet. When I talked about that with some friends they told me : “Are you really able to give maths lesson ? It will take too much time, you should only think to your exams, are you sure you can do both ? An so on.”

    Today I keep doing this, I know that I’m able to do this, I like it, so I was right to not listen to them !

  25. Mari says:

    In the end of the video you encouraged us to write about a time in recent past where we cared too much, so here it goes:

    At the moment I am working part time in a christian kindergarten and one day during lunch break we discussed science and whether or not we believe the current environmental crisis. Me being a to-be physics student immediately delivered a couple of convincing (or at least I thought they were) lines, only too realise they didn’t get why they were good arguments. I guess as I think back on it now it makes sense: they don’t have the same education in that area as me.

    What I learnt from this was that even though people (including myself) don’t share opinions about stuff, they can still have valid points coming from their point of view.
    Watching your video, this means the next time a discussion like this one occurs I will try tip #3 and try and understand more of why people think what they do.

    Thank you for yet another good video Matthew, and as always – looking forward to the next one!

    Love, Mari.

  26. Littleted says:

    Hi Matt
    Great job keep it up.

    Could you do an item on ‘people pleasers’ and how to be more assertive.

    When I am dating, I’m a suck up and I hate myself for doing it, but can’t seem to break the habit. My son nailed it the other day, when he said I morph to the person I’m with, which was a bit of a wake up call and made me quite sad that a young boy should notice this, help.

  27. Lisa G says:

    You should see all the sticky notes I have in my life with snippets of your wisdom written down in a hurry so I don’t forget! I write down EVERYTHING!

  28. Joana says:

    Thanks, Matt! I will have to watch again to write down your tips, just like you suggested. I am 39 years old and have been thinking of a career change for more than 10 years but every time I mention it to my father he gets very irritated and I feel intimidated by the whole idea. He may be right in saying that an office job is more stable than a gym teaching or language teaching career, but I won’t know myself unless I try it. But whenever I think about the idea, the first picture that comes to mind is my father’s anger. I know he wants what is best for me and that’s why he gets so angry, but on the other hand I wish I could finbd the freedom within me to experimente with diferente career paths. He also gets angry when I mention moving to another country. He just can’t control himself. He grew up in a militar boarding school, so tender emotions and empathy are not his strongest traits. I wish I wasn’t so scared of his reaction and that he could believe in my ability to create diferente job scenarios for myself. I know he is just scared I will get hurt and that he wants to protect me, but his anger is so irrational and I know it’s stronger than himself. He doesn’t do this to hurt me, just to protect me.

  29. Paloma says:

    Well I went to a really cool conference by myself… but I didn’t talk to anyone I didn’t know during the breaks.

  30. Cyi Taiga says:

    My fiance and I had 2 children together. We lived in the same city for 4 years, people saw us together all the time. Then he decided that he’s a woman and that ‘she’ needs a new life. He has new lovers now and in Aug 2014 he moved out of state. The kids had to go out of state (different from him) with my mother while I figured out how to support myself and to heal. It’s been months now that I’ve done everything alone but I still get people asking me how my ‘husband’ is doing. I used to cry and then get angry (the whole CRAZY 8 cycle). In Jan 2015 I have a court date to get full custody of the kids (I’m going for full termination of his parental rights but custody is a start). It used to really kill me inside when people asked because I thought that I was somehow a failure- not good enough to be a wife that I turned him into… whatever he is now. But I watched the video (no I didn’t comment!) and then I was at my job as a cashier at a local food store when an old coworker of my ex saw me and said ‘hey you’re Jono’s wife right?’. I smiled and said hi (completely ignoring the comment). That night I was confused because I didn’t feel negative emotions. In fact, I kinda felt proud that people saw me as still happy and balanced. Maybe I’ve handled this ‘divorce’ rather well.

    Your video helped me. Step 1: My identity is a great mother, not ‘Jono’s wife’. Step 2: The pain is my ex’s energy, let him hold it. Step 3: His ex-coworker just wanted to say Hi, so I aligned and said Hello back. ^_^

    It has been almost a year now that my ex has been transitioning with clothes and prescribed drugs. I saw the man I loved and dedicated my soul to… turn into someone I share no values with. I was very lost and self questioning of my own femininity. It was my endless internet searches for ‘how to understand men’ that eventually got me to your information. By understanding how men think and approach relationships, I was able to discover myself. I’m not dating nor interested at this stage. (My focus is on investing so that I can buy a home for my son and daughter) So I felt compelled to tell you that your information helped me on a human level. Not just picking up skills (though you teach some GREAT ONES!) but deeper than that. You let me see him and his actions with compassion. Nothing short of giving me new life.

    I know you have to make money, and keep doing so. But never underestimate the power of the free information you give. He controlled all the money, I literally had $0/month- only internet access. Thank you for giving free content, it helps women who are currently dependent. Please don’t stop, we need you. *hugz*

  31. Hester says:

    These are really useful tips! I’ve been using the “agreeing with the attacker” one for a while without realising, I just say “yeah I thought about that too but I just wanted to try”
    I used to be self conscious about wearing different clothes “would this be too dressy? Will people think I’m doing it for a guy?” but then I realised other people don’t actually look at you and care that much at all… With most things we’re shy about doing (for example learning a new skill you think is weird or getting a slightly different haircut) other people don’t take much notice or think it’s normal!

    • Hester says:

      Oooh I just remembered a recent situation: I wrote an article in a style I’d never tried before that I knew my mother would not approve of and lo and behold, she didn’t. So I said “it’s just something I wanted to try seeing as I want to improve my journalistic skills and explore every technique. To be honest, I don’t really like articles written in the present tense either but it was a good oppertunity just to try it out”

  32. Kate says:

    Hi Matt,

    I came across one of your videos last week and got hooked on your Youtube channel ever since. It really changed my way of thinking. On the third day I went out to buy your book. There is this one thing I wanted to ask you about. I will probably be criticized for asking this but here goes… I’m in love with a guy I work with. The thing is that he already is in a relationship and from what I can tell he is happy. I don’t want to be that person who comes in and destroys everything but… you know. I just want to know if there is something I can do or say to check if he is interested in me. Is it even possible to get him intrigued when he is seeing someone else?

  33. Anne says:

    i care what people think and how he think that I could not make a job and stay here in us by myself,…and my friend thinking i have the intension.. so I focused on the study and career and I begin to drove apart, now he is going to marry sb he knew for 3 month and long term for 8 months and need to get married to get back ! I do not understand, and I am upset for myself for being narrow minded and only mind my own business, I thought he are being with his girl friend and made my peace, but he stopped ask me out after we kissed and confessed he is going to marry her.
    well , sometimes i got trapped in one concept and forgot the big picture.

  34. Tracey says:

    Hey Matt,

    Great video! Listen, I’ve recently launched a new business all about personal development. A dear friend criticized me because I haven’t yet got “all of my stuff together” so how on earth were people going to be on board. After watching your video (And all of them are fabulous by the way) I certainly will be diffusing the argument with all of your suggestions. Great stuff.

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