Why Being A Likeable Person Still Matters…

I say that kindness wins in the end.

Being able to give people joy and make them feel special is still a crucial skill. Especially in business.

Yet being a nice person seems to have been downgraded in our modern culture. It’s almost become more fashionable these days to take the following attitude: If I’m good at my job, it doesn’t matter if I’m that likeable or friendly.

I couldn’t disagree more.

In this week’s episode of LOVELife,  I talk about how being a ‘people person’ is still one of the fundamental assets of people who win in life, and why we should all be deeply concerned about how well we treat people in our every day interactions.

 

9 Texts No Man Can Resist

10 Responses to Why Being A Likeable Person Still Matters…

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  1. Nicole says:

    This is so incredibly true!

    I’ve worked at a local jewelry store for the last 2.5 years and over those years I’ve met all kinds of people, no matter who it is I find it so important to greet them as soon as they walk through the door. Usually for us a simple “hello” leads to a good conversation and at times even a little “therapy” session, haha. A happy employee creates a happy customer who is very likely to return, and because of this my boss is celebrating 36 years in business (a big deal for a independent jeweler in a small community) this month!

    Also, I honestly can say there is no better feeling then to see a customer walk out feeling happy, especially if they weren’t initially happy when they first walked in.

  2. Rachel says:

    Great point about the coffee shops. A study by Harris Interactive / Right Now in 2010 found that almost 9 out of 10 US consumers would pay more to ensure a superior customer experience!

  3. Maria says:

    Interesting observation!
    I got the impression that there are very few people in business who are genuinly nice and do their job well and with full heart. I think there are not many, because our modern idea of winners in business is one of people who are tough,competitive, unemotional and ambitious. These qualities are promoted and rewarded. There is a lot of talking about social and emotional competence but it’s an additional asset that sometimes even leads to less respect and promotion. The nice salesperson is a joy for the costumers but that’s it. There is no significant reward for being nice and people become frustrated. i can’t think of a single person in a leading position who got there because he or she was nice and gentle. In many areas even in everyday life ruthlessness seems to win. Even parents teach their children how to win with cheekiness and ruthlessness. They don’t consider that in the end nobody will be happy in a societ without solidarity.
    Keith Richard wrote about his childhood “there are losers and bullies ” hopefully there are better choices in adulthood. hopefully i am wrong and kindness will win!

  4. Tara says:

    Matt, you go out of your way to treat us with respect, attention and kindness and I can tell you that it makes all the difference in the world.

  5. Lesli says:

    Matthew,

    I truly believe that this filters down from the top. Upper management sets the tone and it follows down through the ranks. Businesses are far too focused on short term profits and not long term sustainability. I absolutely agree, the businesses that will survive for the long haul are those who treat their customers well. Sadly, month revenues and stock prices are the priority, not customers.

    I like the deviation from “love life”. You have wisdom in business, as well.

    Thanks for you insight.

    Leslie

  6. Emily says:

    Being stereotypical, but welcome to NYC!

  7. Maya says:

    Did not know where can I ask this : I am a girl always seeking for attention, can that be a reason that i can not get into a stable relationship. I hate that I am like that, how can i solve it?

  8. Ramona says:

    Nice topic Mattew. Alexis is totally right as well. We customers do not always appreciate the service being done for us. Obviously we are paying for the product or service, but anyway gratitude is just out of humanity and showing we understand you are not just a machine making coffee for us.
    This part is on us and also another part, how to convey the message their ungrateful attitude towards us “custormers” is not right? When you constantly go to that store without even expressing a word, no matter how they misbehave or depreciate you choosing them, how would they know they have to change their bad attitude? Nothing will change ever. What do you suggest then? How is the best way to get this message across? Talking to the manager maybe?- who might be just the same as their employees!-

    • Karen says:

      So far I think the only thing we can do here is to be nice and smile at them first, and maybe ask them ” how’s your day?”, then expect the same from them. This is one thing I learned from Matthew’s Impact program, it called ” reciprocity”.

      I have tried to talk to people first and at least I didn’t get bad reaction. I also believe most people are not that bad, sometime they just had a bad day, got tired, or they just simply hate their job lol. But of course if we did what we could and still didn’t get the result we want, just simply walk away. Those type of people are everywhere and don’t let them ruin our beautiful day :)

  9. Alexis says:

    I couldn’t agree more with this, though I’ll be honest, I don’t notice this as much where I live in Canada. On the flip side, I have to wonder how disconnected customers are and can treat service staff. There have been a few times where I’ve noticed customers on their phones, barely even acknowledging the person taking their order. It’s a two way street and I can see how someone putting up with that behaviour almost regularly from customers can be dehumanizing (I think Brene Brown actually mentions something to this effect, in speaking about disconnection in her book ‘Daring Greatly’). Just a little food for thought. Great post Matt!

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