The High-Value Woman Position On Miley Cyrus

The whole Miley Cyrus phenomenon has been on a lot of people’s lips recently. I generally don’t use my platform to talk about celebrities, firstly because I don’t like to judge people whose lives I know nothing about, and secondly because I don’t much care what they are up to. 

I did however watch the VMAs along with a lot of other people, and found the whole performance somewhat uncomfortable. It’s hard to express exactly why without some serious reflection. 

I believe in empowering women and showing them what beautiful people they are. I believe respecting women to be of the utmost importance, secondary only to a woman’s own self-respect. 

So I was left a little conflicted with the Miley thing. A lot of people are judging her right now. She’s entitled to go through phases, just like any of us have. In a perfect world she’d be entitled to go through these phases without the judgement of millions of fans and non fans. Unfortunately (and fortunately for her income), she has millions of fans and non fans ready to judge her. 

The truth is, I do not care what the world thinks of what she’s doing. Nor do I much care about what the general population thinks about anything. We all have to be smart enough to look at a situation objectively without the rants of the mindless controlling every aspect of our thought. The temptation to parrot the demagogic ramblings of the gross tabloids and magazines is always there. 

But I’m reluctant to go down the righteous route of “she’s a role model so she should do better”. She’s not some elected politician who has a responsibility to their electorate. She’s a singer. She makes lot’s of money selling records, amongst other things. I will admit to finding the concept of lots of teenage girls emulating this ‘phase’ disturbing, but whether that really is her responsibility is another matter. God forbid we ever be in a position where every move we make is judged on how great an example it presents to millions of others; an impossible standard to live up to to say the least.

Although I don’t think ‘Miley news’ or any sort of celebrity news is ever really interesting or of any consequence, yesterday something did catch my attention: an open letter from Sinead O’Connor to Miley Cyrus.

Since I cannot talk from any personal experience of the music industry, nor of being a 20 year old woman, this letter contained a lot more credibility than I have on both counts. 
 
After allegedly claiming that her Wrecking Ball video was inspired by O’Connor’s Nothing Compares 2U, Sinead expressed her concern for Miley not only as an artist but as a woman. 
 
This letter sums up the ‘High Value’ way to look at this situation more authoritatively than I could. It’s long, but it’s worth the read I assure you.

After you’ve read it, let me know what you think. I’d love to hear your opinions on the matter (I would love it if the comments weren’t about Miley Cyrus, but about the situation itself. There’s enough judgement on her as an individual without us having to add to the pile. I think it’s much more positive to keep it constructive and look at it as something to take personal learnings from).

 

Dear Miley,

I wasn’t going to write this letter, but today i’ve been dodging phone calls from various newspapers who wished me to remark upon your having said in Rolling Stone your Wrecking Ball video was designed to be similar to the one for Nothing Compares … So this is what I need to say … And it is said in the spirit of motherliness and with love.

I am extremely concerned for you that those around you have led you to believe, or encouraged you in your own belief, that it is in any way ‘cool’ to be naked and licking sledgehammers in your videos. It is in fact the case that you will obscure your talent by allowing yourself to be pimped, whether its the music business or yourself doing the pimping.

Nothing but harm will come in the long run, from allowing yourself to be exploited, and it is absolutely NOT in ANY way an empowerment of yourself or any other young women, for you to send across the message that you are to be valued (even by you) more for your sexual appeal than your obvious talent.
I am happy to hear I am somewhat of a role model for you and I hope that because of that you will pay close attention to what I am telling you.

The music business doesn’t give a shit about you, or any of us. They will prostitute you for all you are worth, and cleverly make you think its what YOU wanted … and when you end up in rehab as a result of being prostituted, ‘they’ will be sunning themselves on their yachts in Antigua, which they bought by selling your body and you will find yourself very alone.

None of the men ogling you give a shit about you either, do not be fooled. Many’s the woman mistook lust for love. If they want you sexually that doesn’t mean they give a fuck about you. All the more true when you unwittingly give the impression you don’t give much of a fuck about yourself. And when you employ people who give the impression they don’t give much of a fuck about you either. No one who cares about you could support your being pimped … and that includes you yourself.

Yes, I’m suggesting you don’t care for yourself. That has to change. You ought be protected as a precious young lady by anyone in your employ and anyone around you, including you. This is a dangerous world. We don’t encourage our daughters to walk around naked in it because it makes them prey for animals and less than animals, a distressing majority of whom work in the music industry and it’s associated media.

You are worth more than your body or your sexual appeal. The world of showbiz doesn’t see things that way, they like things to be seen the other way, whether they are magazines who want you on their cover, or whatever … Don’t be under any illusions … ALL of them want you because they’re making money off your youth and your beauty … which they could not do except for the fact your youth makes you blind to the evils of show business. If you have an innocent heart you can’t recognise those who do not.

I repeat, you have enough talent that you don’t need to let the music business make a prostitute of you. You shouldn’t let them make a fool of you either. Don’t think for a moment that any of them give a flying fuck about you. They’re there for the money… we’re there for the music. It has always been that way and it will always be that way. The sooner a young lady gets to know that, the sooner she can be REALLY in control.

You also said in Rolling Stone that your look is based on mine. The look I chose, I chose on purpose at a time when my record company were encouraging me to do what you have done. I felt I would rather be judged on my talent and not my looks. I am happy that I made that choice, not least because I do not find myself on the proverbial rag heap now that I am almost 47 yrs of age … which unfortunately many female artists who have based their image around their sexuality, end up on when they reach middle age.

Real empowerment of yourself as a woman would be to in future refuse to exploit your body or your sexuality in order for men to make money from you. I needn’t even ask the question … I’ve been in the business long enough to know that men are making more money than you are from you getting naked. Its really not at all cool. And its sending dangerous signals to other young women. Please in future say no when you are asked to prostitute yourself. Your body is for you and your boyfriend. It isn’t for every spunk-spewing dirtbag on the net, or every greedy record company executive to buy his mistresses diamonds with.

As for the shedding of the Hannah Montana image … whoever is telling you getting naked is the way to do that does absolutely NOT respect your talent, or you as a young lady. Your records are good enough for you not to need any shedding of Hannah Montana. She’s waaaaaaay gone by now … Not because you got naked but because you make great records.

Whether we like it or not, us females in the industry are role models and as such we have to be extremely careful what messages we send to other women. The message you keep sending is that its somehow cool to be prostituted … its so not cool Miley … its dangerous. Women are to be valued for so much more than their sexuality. We aren’t merely objects of desire. I would be encouraging you to send healthier messages to your peers … that they and you are worth more than what is currently going on in your career. Kindly fire any motherfucker who hasn’t expressed alarm, because they don’t care about you.

As posted on www.sineadoconnor.com

###

Remember to leave a comment. What are your thoughts on the situation?

9 Texts No Man Can Resist

226 Responses to The High-Value Woman Position On Miley Cyrus

Leave a Reply

Your email address will not be published. Required fields are marked *

  1. Fame says:

    Thank you so much for having shared this with us. I have been your fan for about 8 months now and appreciate what you are screaming to the women out there. “Don’t compromise to your ultimate detriment” which is what we women have so often done when we really like a guy. As intelligent or wise, humble or purposeful, we nurturers in the current times of working and earning give a lot more, do a lot more for that special person in our lives.

    You’ve so often talked about minding the game guys play, and whilst we are aware it is not that easy to pretend that we are not thinking about them as often as we do. We can’t help it. We cannot do all those ambitious things that we once did once we’ve given our hearts to them and been then made to feel less valued simply for that.

    But after a period of obvious hurt and deprivation from not getting the attention we seek, after carrying out some of your great advise by the way, only makes us remember the other great advise that we have not had the courage to muster. And that is, to grow and improve ourselves for ourselves.

    After all it does eventually comes back to improving our self worth and being able to offer more to the world.

    I have so much respect for you and value your contribution you make towards improved living on the whole.

  2. Michelle Clarke says:

    I just had to watch the youtube video of Miley Cyrus VMA 2013. It’s inappropriate… Just Like a lot of other music videos/movies/tv sitcoms I’ve seen. We live in a sex crazed society. Full stop. I wouldn’t say anyone is better than the next.

    OK, this is my last comment on this great article.

  3. Michelle Clarke says:

    I just think it’s ironic to make up standards of decency when people refuse to accept an objective standard. My standard of purity/decency comes from the Bible – which is objective/authoritative/unchanging/black and white. There nothing in the US Constitution right now about purity. Miley isn’t at a school with uniforms. So I think it’s unfair almost arrogant of people to make up rules for her – as if they’re any better. For instance, how is Beyoncé, Madonna, even Taylor Swift better? (See my last comment.) Who came up with a standard? If people or society doesn’t believe is saving sex (sexual behavior) for marriage then… what does it really matter? And why are you judging someone who is taking advantage of the same liberties everyone else does – that of sex outside of marriage.

  4. Michelle Clarke says:

    I didn’t watch the VMA. I didn’t see her music video. So I legitimately cannot comment on Miley Cyrus. However, I’ve seen other music videos of other artists. It is crazy to me to say that Miley is “pimping” more than other female AND male artists. They’re all using they’re sexuality to some degree. Some do it in a more acceptable, classy way. But it’s still there. You still feel the manipulation. And it’s not limited to musicians. Everyday people do it. Perhaps the other artists didn’t make you feel uncomfortable, Stephen. But they were trying to manipulate you through sexual attraction too.

  5. Caroline says:

    Sinead O’Connor is relevant to this debate because Miley Cyrus involved her in it by citing her as the inspiration of her video. Ms. O’Connor has been in the music industry longer than Ms. Cyrus has been alive and she has a long and varied personal life, which is well documented and she has openly discussed. I believe this letter was written as an act of wisdom and love and I respect Sinead O’Connor for doing so. We should value and love ourselves, we are all sacred, important and irreplaceable. All of us.

  6. live chat says:

    Hi, i believe that i saw you visited my web site so i got here to return the want?.I’m attempting to to find issues to improve my web site!I guess its adequate to use a few of your ideas!!

  7. Corinne says:

    Very quickly this web site will be famous amid all blog viewers, due to it’s nice articles or reviews

  8. Angela says:

    Wow! What a heartfelt gesture the letter was.
    The big question is, how did Miley respond? Did she take it in the spirit with which it was intended, or get pissed?

  9. chubby dating says:

    He accepted the thoughtful gift with no complaints, popped opened the can, and ate
    whole heartedly. Or on second thought, it looked more like
    she had just been busted. However, logic dictates that if a percentage of the population are homosexual, then a percentage of professional players
    are homosexual also.

  10. executive coaching london says:

    Great blog you’ve ggot here.. It’s difficult to find high-quality writing like yours nowadays.

    I reeally appreciate individuals like you! Take
    care!!

  11. Geraldine says:

    This is similar to my own shower enclosure my family
    and i got a hold of just lately, so satisfied about it for individuals on the fence on
    the subject of getting one, get it done, you wont regret it

  12. voyance idf1 says:

    I have been exploring for a little bit for any high quality articles or weblog
    posts in this sort of area . Exploring in Yahoo I ultimately stumbled upon this website.
    Reading this info So i am glad to exhibit that I have a
    very good uncanny feeling I found out exactly what I needed.
    I such a lot no doubt will make certain to do not put out of your mind
    this website and provides it a look regularly.

  13. Leticia says:

    Eventually I got a very diverse experience and got to do
    a depressive disorder nos definition series of techniques.
    Either way, once you taste it,onceyou break, once you have
    completed your supervised hours, pass the board exam and become either
    a licensed marriuage and family counselors. Billed aas ‘the ugly one in the crowd, depressive disorder nos definition and that he must think steadily of strength, and have no relation to
    real diagnosis.

  14. Gaichuiliu gangmei says:

    I truely agreed wats c says…

  15. Zoila says:

    I totally agree wut this person and her letter letter

  16. plumbers boca raton area says:

    If you wish foor to increase your know-how just kerp visiting
    this site aand be updated with the hottrst nnews update postfed here.

  17. Black evening says:

    Maay I simply just say what a relief to uncover someone
    who truly understands what they are discussing onn the net.

    Youu certainly understand hhow to bding a problem to light and make it important.

    More people ought too look at this and understand this side
    of the story. I was surprised that you aren’t more popular given
    that you certainly have the gift.

  18. Bagicha Padilla says:

    Wow! Very well said, Sinead! If there’s anyone Miley could be prone to listen to, is her, since she’s expressed Sinead is a role model for her. That presentation was shocking for me too, and my opinion about it was not good at all, I must say. In short, I thought that she wanted to emulate Lady Gaga, and show what an amazingly creative and innovative person she is, still she ended up showing up as a low-valued, somehow pathetic character. Now, I don’t like judging either. Having an opinion is one thing, judging is another. So I gave myself permission to listen to what she had to say about her presentation and kind of reckless behavior. And well, I have to say that the girl apart from talented, is extremely intelligent. She demonstrates to be in control of herself (in my opinion) and is very clear about the fact that all she wanted was to call the attention of everyone, while she’s expressing how she feels inside at this very moment of her life. She knows what she’s exposing herself to, and she does it anyways, because she wants to express herself more than she wants the attention. I don’t think she’s being manipulated. She’s choosing to express herself the way she understands she needs to at the moment. Just a phase she’s going through? Most likely. And in a perfect world as you say, nobody would give it so much attention, and would just let her be, until she’s ready to move on to the next stage of her life. But since it’s not a perfect world, she’s making millions in the meantime :)))

  19. Kristen says:

    i think the letter is the truth and is a great message for all young women, however by making this letter public not only did she put miley on the defensive, it also makes you wonder is she really trying to be helpful or just make her self relevant

  20. Julie says:

    Very well said! As a teacher, I see teenagers daily, and I am concerned about the fact that girls wear clothes to school that make them look like prostitutes. Teachers have no way of forbidding it, parents just don’t do it, can’t do it either or are clueless. However, I also see a lot of guys going for the girl with the fake bodyparts and sluttly clothes, they do not seem to care about much else. And I totally agree that they actually ‘don’t give a fuck’. But people stive for appreciation. It is biologically determined that we don’t want to be alone and we want to be appreciated. And since men only really respond to a certain kind of, for want of a better word even though it is a stretch here, ‘style’, women will do what Miley did to get appreciation. Our society is just that messed up. How we are not extinct is beyond me, but that is how it is.

  21. Foxy Lady says:

    Thanks for posting this letter. Very heartfelt and something that I think-personally-needed to be said. I hope MIley will read this and keep it in mind.

  22. Janet says:

    Matt as Harry Potter… just when I thought he couldn’t be any cuter… :)

  23. heather says:

    I understand what Sinead is trying to say , yeah everyone should value themselves and Miley is doing the opposite . But hey .. have you ever seen one of those lottery adds and it has people saying what they’d do for very large amounts of money on them ? I dont know about anyone else but if i needed to ‘twerk’ toget the amount of money Mileys getting paid , id fucking ‘twerk’. Think about it , she needs people to talk about her , thats what every famous person needs , its how they get paid .. whether its good or bad that they’re talking about people will talk and that makes her shit loads of money and popularity (might be for bad but you’d still do it for the money she’s earning right ? ) . Shes young and her attitude is fuck it , and motherfuckers love it ! . im not a big fan myself but I wouldnt mind being her for a day .. let the haters hate they aint the ones making the money , everything will be forgotton about in a while and guess what ? she will still have her money . Please write back . Heather

  24. Sassy one says:

    Matthew- I appreciate not only what you had to share in your own words but for sharing Sinead’s letter! It is such a good reminder to all of us women who we really are and that we should not allow ourselves to be objects of desire. Well of course it’s great to be the object of desire to only one person but that would be normal. :)
    Thank you for all that you share! And I love your rants – all of them- so keep them coming! Your honesty is refreshing and I’m never intimidated or offended in the least. I get a chuckle out of your rants! So cute!
    Take care.

  25. Sarah says:

    wow really well said. Much respect to Sinead O’ Conner. I do hope she reads it and that many more young talented singers will get and understand this message

  26. Andrea A says:

    Hi Matt,

    Wow, that was such a deep and meaningful letter. Her words have touched me in so many different ways, even though I have no connection to Miley’s situation at all, and I hope these wise words from Sinead will somehow touch Miley’s heart also.

    Today’s society has changed extremely, to the point where people are now more concerned about their image than the actual value or talent they bring to the world, and I agree with Sinead.

    I am only 19 years old, therefore I am in no place where I could make any rational judgements. But I feel as though I am old enough to understand that every human being is worth more than they think. Once they believe that, I think only then they will create positive impact in the people around them, in ways which will inspire others to reach their maximum potential.

    I think this message that Sinead is trying to put across is beautiful in ways that will wake young women wake up from this artificial world we are living in – I would include myself in this fact. Like Michael Jackson once said in his “Man in the Mirror” single, “I’m starting with the (wo)man in the mirror!”.

  27. Mahreen Shahid says:

    Hello Matt, You did right by many women by posting this. Cause alot of the times i have also come across ladies that have make it a point to show off their body and not in a nice way! What is sad here that these women don’t understand that showing your body off like that does not give you respect. Respect is not earned by looks but it is earned by character and manners.

    You have to be Stylish and sexy without exposing and if people do love you they should love you for your brains not your body!

    Physical Attraction, I suppose Matthew will disagree with me on this, is merely a step 1 for you to have the utmost attention of a man you need to have the Charisma and Witt to Attract him further and combine these too along the way!

    Please Respond if you agree or disagree! :)

  28. Isabella says:

    thanks Matt! it`s really an appealing letter for all women, especially for young ladies. I can feel the motherly love from Mrs.O’Connor and I am very glad I have the chance to learn from this issue.all the kindness and good will to Miley, I believe she will find her way and be fabulous for herself and her fans.

    Matt, I truly appreciate what you do for us ( women).what you teach us is much more than the practical skills, but to recognize our value and cherish ourselves.it might sound strange, what you teach us is somehow similar to some traditional Chinese values which young generation keep neglecting. btw, it`s quite entertaining when you speak Chinese lol your accent may be better than mine :D

  29. Lauren says:

    “So I had to be careful. I recognized the responsibility that, whether I liked it or not, I had to accept whatever the obligation was. That was to behave in a manner, to carry myself in such a professional way, as if there ever is a reflection, it’s a positive one.” – Sidney Poitier

    This quote says so much to me – it reminds me of a time when human dignity was scarce, for all peoples. Yet many rose above it not just for them but for those to come. Thats the kind of mark that needs to be left behind. Yes we should be High Value Women but also a High Value Human. Oh and it was SO nice of Sinead to relate to Miley as a PEER! Sucks that she doesn’t pay heed to advice.

  30. Nofyah Shem Tov says:

    This video came across my Facebook Timeline today: it’s corny, made by a high school singing group and the point is fantastic! @matt I sent it to your email but I’m posting it here.

    http://youtu.be/oartIE7rKuM

  31. Sara says:

    I am 30. I wear clothes that I like for me- I walk a lot, I get into life- they are often little clothes. I also wear clothes that I less than care for in order to conform to my work- not a problem. I’m actually celibate but as my gay guy friend has often told me, if you dress like a slut then guys will think that you are a slut. I don’t really care- I don’t think it is fair to expect women to walk around in Burkas because men just can’t help themselves, and in my spare time I’m resigned to just let them. However, I believe that the most amazing & special thing about me is my brain. At work I want to be damn sure that not even the slowist of men could ever deny that at least I must feel that way. I can’t control what people think of me or what they see in me, but I can control what I think about myself. I think that Sinead seems very wise and caring. I think that Miley is at an age for women that we often lack the sense of self to put ourselves first and really treasure ourselves. Naturally men & women too, often exploit vulnerable young women & it’s a shame. I hope Miley does make it through okay, and starts to truly value herself more. I do have to wonder how any caring parents wouldn’t have picked up on that, especially when Billy Ray was used up & spat out himself to an extent. Hate to judge, but are her parents not the demons in all of this?

    • Caroline says:

      No one suggested a Burka. What was being respectfully suggested was that being naked in a video maybe something that Ms. Cyrus think twice about doing again and that potentially all of us women out there should respect and value ourselves. Dress how you want Sara, no one is telling you how to dress. The letter is, in my opinion full of love and concern and I respect Ms. O’Connor for that.

  32. Mel says:

    It took me aaaages to have an opinion on this, especially after reading everyones arguements for an against and I was hoping to have some clevery constructed response bordering on profound and moving but the truth is, I actually don’t know.

    Speaking as a 23 year old; can I really condemn her when I go out on nights out in bodycon dresses to show off my figure and legs or that my eight year old niece likes me to put my lipstick on her lips so she can be like her auntie? (In defence of me: It’s organic clear lipbalm but she thinks its grown up) The point is; where do we draw the line? If I buy a clevage enchancing bra or skyscraper heels then am I part of the problem not solution?

    As I said, I really don’t know if Im entitled to judge this.

  33. Christina says:

    I am impressed with the letter so much that I also want my daughter to read it. She is 15 and we used to watch “Hannah Montana” together. She likes Mylie but I think she is rather confused to see the new Mylie. And I believe this letter will help her understand a lot.

  34. Teams Glardon-Cooper says:

    Sinead wrote a fantastic letter. This is imperative honest information for all women. We have to respect ourselves enough to say no. Its sorrowful to see anyone male or female exploited. Its why we are feel uncomfortable and sleazy when we see that exploitation. Sinead is not a personal role model of mine, though I like her her music. As an older woman whose has been there I appreciate her sharing her wisdom.

  35. Leah says:

    Wow.
    If Miley doesn’t take that advice, then I don’t know what is to happen to her. Sinead has said truths that all young women should be employing, whether that be in their own professions or in the dating world. Pimping your body/sexuality can only lead to dangerous paths, as our world of ‘hook-up culture’ has shown. As a 24 year old, I can attest to seeing so many young women fall into this trap, thinking that they will be more respected if they are the ones ‘controlling’ their sexuality by allowed men to objectify them in such ways. It’s just backwards! I’m so happy Sinead wrote this for all to see!

  36. MyMy says:

    I completely agree. I’m 21yr old and I work with young girls ages 11-20 and we teach them this everyday we talk to them. That they need to have respect for themselves and know that they are worth so much more then they could ever understand. We tell them that they are worth more then diamonds and more precious than gold. We work to build them up into high valued women that will not lower there standards for anyone. I’m young just like Miley but I’ve learned for myself that I will no longer subject myself to just anything. I know that I must respect my body and have a standard that others must respect it as well. The group that I work with is called Valuable Young Women and I think that my girls could teach her a thing or two

  37. Rose says:

    I agree with Sinead – it is merely exploitation of a young woman going through a phase in her life.
    She is too young and has lived in a confined box so her understanding and inference of the situation is limited to her restricted socialisation. Her father was in the ‘celebrity world’ and she herself was pretty much born and bred into this world. For her attention seeking is ‘normal’ for many of us it is a profound deficiency in oneself (such as low self esteem) which we are trying to address / alleviate through validation by others.
    For a celebrity this is obviously done on a larger and somewhat more extreme scale.
    I think Miley is dangerously close to pushing the extremes so far that there will be little left for her to do. And what is it all in aide of? She needs to leave the world of celebrity for a while and reflect on who she is – and if the answer is “don’t know” then go and make herself the person she wants to be – not who she is expected to be.

  38. Elise says:

    she said it all…

    in a way i already knew but didnt have the words to translate the worse type foolishness…
    …promote the triviality and selling yourself

    now days this kind of thing make it easy to men to treat all of us as undervalued promiscuous girls, makes me sad and sic to know there are so many women thinking this is what men want end how they can get best doing it. the worst is this way they make “good” girls (sort of saying) been confused with the type or worst, looking boring or to hard to get, as there are so many so easy to reach.

    sad sad sad

  39. Jessica Alvarez says:

    It has been interesting to read Sinead’s letter and people’s comments.

    I have been sort of aware of the talk that Miley’s performance generated, but I had not thought about the subject too much until I got your email with the link to this page.

    Personally I share the feeling you had when you watched the show. I only saw short cuts of it on the news, but what I saw also made me feel uncomfortable. But beyond that I found the whole thing a paradox and couldn’t help but feel apathy.

    After reading Sinead’s letter I reflected on why.

    Sinead points out at the fact that the people behind Miley’s every move are the people who call the shots in that industry.

    Yes, it is Miley’s responsibility to accept or reject what is proposed to her, but reality is not that simple.

    I don’t live under the intense pressure that celebrities experience, but I can imagine it must be quite intense because even for a regular person like me, pressure at work and the amount of energy it requires to make the right decision at times, have always been significant … specially for a woman. Then again, even more so for a young woman.

    I am not even talking about an industry that exploits sex for profit. In general, the world is not yet a place that treats women equal to men, and there is plenty of evidence of this at a global scale.

    The faceless men that Sinead refers to, seem always rewarded with profit and impunity from the very people that feel outrage at situations such as the one that Miley chose to embrace.

    The sex appeal that young women seek these days is merely a competition among themselves, staged by industries that know about selling products. Ads have been selling sex and popularity to teenagers and young adults for a very long time, and although it can be said that not everyone falls for it, evidence shows that this is not true for the majority.

    An example of sex sells for me is Kelis’ Milshake video. I saw this on a Saturday morning a few years ago, and as a grown woman my jaw dropped. Nevertheless, this video was shown many Saturday’s in a row at 11am, and I don’t recall any public uproar about the singer, or about the faceless men pulling the strings.

    I think that if we are going to talk about women’s values, then we need to be honest about what is going on in society as a whole, rather than selecting the effect rather than the cause. That is, to have an open and honest discussion about what it means to be a woman in the 21st century.

    After all, even today in a country such as Australia, women are paid less than their male counterparts, pregnancy and children in the corporate environment are not welcomed, and the penalty for the rape of a woman is ludicrous.

    Which brings to mind the public uproar inspired by Roman Polanski’s alleged rape. I remember that at the time, the majority of people I hear talking about the situation were saying that they were shocked and horrified at his arrest, without a shred of evidence either way. They seem smitten by the man’s career which is quite disconcerting to say the least.
    Whether or not he is guilty should be a matter for the court. But instead, in the minds of so very many men and women, what had happened (if indeed it happened at all, it was said), had happened a long time ago and was not relevant any more.

    As I reflect on just these very few points, I understand now why I felt apathetic about all the comments expressing indignity at Miley’s performance.

    If we are really concerned about the value of young girls and young women and their self esteem, then we could:

    -be sure to provide community environments that empower women from a very early age so that the impact of the media is minimum.

    – campaign for tougher penalties for the rape of women, including prostitutes.

    – have a public uproar about media messages aimed at young people, but in particular a public uproar about the faceless men behind those messages (have paparazzis taking their pictures, get their stories on the news, shame them on Facebook, etc)

    – at schools, create an environment that teach young boys – from a very early age – to respect and care for women and be at ease with the opposite sex in relation to their sexuality and intelligence (making sure male teachers lead by example)

    – create environments in the media and social media that promote all of the above.

    Too much?…

    To me there is no use in picking popular scenarios to get outraged about. I think that with respect to women’s values and self esteem, there are plenty of scandalous situations to be overwhelmed by in many aspects of our daily routines.

    In all honesty, expressing shock at Miley’s performance without expressing shock at everything else that negatively affects the value of women is extremely inconsistent, and cannot possibly be taken seriously. Much like Miley’s performance.

    • Nike Eseyin says:

      Well said Jessica,couldn’t have said it any better.

    • Dace says:

      Best comentary! Honest, couldn’t say better.

      Btw, what I had in my mind for some time… I don’t know how Miley trully feels about it all and how she will get out of this , BUT she have done massive impact on the fact that people now are thinking, talking more loud, more often on all these bad things happening to young girls, woman across the world.

      She have pushed all us, even those who don’t involve in all this Miley situation, to THINK.

      We can look at her as on young poor thing, but maybe, just maybe she will grow big and strong out of this… And she could start a big movement…

  40. Marie Henriksson says:

    I wish men would start treating women as humans, not as something to play with that didn’t have feelings. I wish the musicindustry would start treating talented young men and women as humans instead of moneycows without feelings. I wish every woman should start treating themselves as humans deserving everything in life without feeling they have to undress and alluding to sex all the time. We are humans and shall be respected as humans. Why is this so hard to understand? Why is life built on disrespect for eachother and why is money and power the only way to go? We all can write a new history – but not the way “Miley” chooses to do it. I can understand it’s hard to be a celebratie – but you need to understand that you are writing history for many young people. You have to write it well!!!!!

  41. Anoushka says:

    Our behaviour in life is a result of what we believe in.

  42. Traci Dean says:

    Dear Matthew,
    My opinion, I strongly agree with Sinead O’Connor’s letter to Miley. To be honest I look at people as an individual and not as someone with alot of money or fame. Today society is mostly made up of hatred and judging on what is right or wrong, we forget the big pitcure on how we are all just people with a different story. I don’t beileve what Miley presented was right for the image of millions of fans and even family to watch and think of her as a “role model.” But I also think what she did shouldn’t have been so hatred toward her by the media and by the people who judge her because their morals are different. Deeply I could go in depth with this topic but my main opinion about Miley is I really respect her as a musician, she comes up with heartfilled lyrics and has beautiful voice to sing her feelings that can’t be explained through words. She’s like any young woman who is living in this crazy world dealing with issues alot of people can relate to. I am also her age and it can’t be easy for her being in the spot light, getting judged, trying to keep sain and to live a personal life. I garentee she’s lost her self respect through the life experiences of drugs, men and cruel people filling her head on what is right. I truley hope she can get the help she needs to be satisfide with who she really is and stop rebelling and hurting so much. Alittle off topic but your book “How to get the Guy” had great valid points that true beauty comes from following your own personality and being a high-valued woman with it. Miley is beautiful she just lost her way. Love is a dangerous battle, you just have to believe in it.

  43. Tabbycat says:

    HI Matthew,

    You bring up a good subject about Miley Cyrus’s performance at the VMAs. It was shocking and very disturbing to see the Disney tv star look like and act like a poster image of Hookerville and act worst.

    But why she was doing is more disturbing as she claims she sold her soul to the devil. Her tongue hanging out was to invoke an ancient God called Bala. All the Illuminati hand gestures and sexual behavior was awful to watch. Miley sings really really well. She performs really well. She don’t need to do any of that.
    She sells her music without it. I kept asking myself why is she doing this ? What the heck in the point ?

    Well the Illuminati is who she means when she says she sold her soul to the devil. Illuminati are a very powerful shadow group in the music industry that makes or breaks stars. So to further her career Miley felt she had to sell her soul to the Illuminati in order to keep and further her career and fame. Illuminati are a vile group of child molesters, sociopaths, psychopaths and murders who demand that others bow down to them and they are powerful enough to end your career or kill you (Michael Jackson) if you don’t do what they say. Miley sticking out her tongue was invoking an ancient God named Bala. All the sexual movements, her hand gestures all come from this shadow group Illiminati.

    If Miley was not controlled by this shadow group, I really don’t think we would have seen such a high value female degrade herself like that. Her dad, Billy Ray Cyrus must of run into this shadow group and he must of warned her about them and yet, she sells her soul to them.

    You picked a hard subject, Miley Cyrus, to try and come up with HV with. She threw all of her high value out with that one performance. Not sure how you can come back from that.

  44. rose says:

    I think that her message is straight on. I also think it can be applied to most aspects of life for women, not just the music industry. Just like when some women get in a relationship and change to conform to what the man they think they want, wants them to be. Trusting in ourselves and our own worth will make us stronger and wind up in much better relationships.

  45. Carrie says:

    I totally agree with the advice given in this letter!! Hope Miley will be introspective and smart enough to follow the advice.

  46. Berlin says:

    I cannot put into words how much I agree with every word that Sinead wrote. As a 20 year old woman, I appreciate the advice that she has given. I hope every young woman has an opportunity to read this.

  47. Oraine says:

    Very well said.

  48. Tulisa says:

    She went straight to the point. And I think she’s right about how they want to make money out of miley. It’s up to miley to stop giving in to their demand. She’s beautiful and talented

  49. Wendy says:

    I whished I had someone take the time to express a hart felt concern for me when I was young. It wasn’t untill I had a little age on me before I realized how much bullshit I had bought into. My primary nature is to be a people pleaser, naturally that left me wide open to be exploited. Face it, men define the fashion industry wright down to the clothes thats sold at Wall-Mart not to mention what we are suposed to look like. It’s all about “That Thing”.

  50. Suz says:

    Thanks Matt! Sinead said it so well! It makes me sad that so many young girls think they can win a boys heart by flashing their body.

  51. Reine says:

    Although I am not a fan of Miley,I whole heartily agree with what Sinead had to say in her letter. Women don’t find success, or real success in life from pimping themselves out like that or letting themselves be pimped out like that. It’s not right, my boyfriend tells me that he loves me because I have self respect, guys don’t truly love a women who has no self respect like that. I’m happy Sinead sent that letter, she is someone who believes in empowering women, good for her.

  52. Elaine says:

    I’m long in the tooth now and quite frankly celebrity gossip goes over my head. Sinead goes on to ask Miley who is advising her?
    We all have a conscience. We all have our limits. We can judge any and all celebrities on their behaviour and that apparently, they are role models. Celebrities are not a reflection of the real world but like so many youngsters who don’t have the benefit of hind-sight or a crystal ball, they can’t see themselves sat with friends in 5-10yrs time saying to each other ‘what the hell was I thinking?’. Youngsters rebel, especially the ones who want to be heard. Miley is not the first and most certainly won’t be the last. I have so many memories of my past behaviour that makes me cringe. It has made me aware of what I’m prepared to do nowadays. I don’t fall the the first guy who tells me I’m pretty anymore, I don’t trust the friend that tells me it’s only a short drive to go clubbing in Manchester (from Birmingham). This line of Coke won’t get you hooked.
    We are all impressionable at all stages of life. If Miley is getting advice from some perv who’s telling her to get kinky on a rather large hunk of metal…I’m sure she sacked the advisor in the background who shook their head and tried to protect her!
    It’s about choices and right now there are people choosing not to twerk and those who are going out of their way to twerk in your face. I reckon a bit like the Macarena-it will all just be an embarrassing moment from the past and something more horrific will take its place.
    I am who I am today because of the mistakes I made … And subscribing to Matthew Hussey of course!

  53. Nicole says:

    While I’m sure your heart is in the right place, Sinead’s response seems a bit short-sighted and archaic. I believe women should be able to do what they want, famous or not, and I feel like this letter undercuts and pidgeon-holes Cyrus in a way that a typical man might, which is counter-productive and reductionist.

    Amanda Palmer eloquently shares how I, and many modern women, feel about the topic, so I’m suggesting this great article to your readers as a counterpoint:

    http://www.brooklynvegan.com/archives/2013/10/amanda_palmers_3.html

  54. Cathy says:

    Thank you for sharing this letter, Matt. Men will not learn to value women when women express themselves in such a one dimensional way. 25 years ago, when I was in college, I went through the phase of thinking, “I’m tired of being a good girl. If a man can have sex when he wants with who he wants, so can I.” But I never got anyone to love and cherish me that way.

  55. Carla says:

    I think Miley is just trying to grow out of her image the wrong way. I do believe Sinead would have more of a positive impact and be more credible as a high value woman if she would clean up her mouth. Seems like she does not care any more than anyone else talking to her that way

  56. angela davis says:

    Thank you, Sinead O’Conner for being honest with truth in love. I feel sad that artist believe the lie that sex sells music. I wish all the artists – male and female would realize at the end of the day their music sells itself. I have bought a cd because of one song and found better songs on the cd then what was actually slatted for the radio. I am raising a son and I have to keep reminding him that he should treat all women like he would treat me with respect regardless of how she is protraying herself to combact this streaming nonsense that women are just objects that keeps being maintained by media and music

  57. Jackie says:

    Hi Matt,
    I agree with Sinead O’Connor, especially since she argues a case for values in a world which seems to base actions on poor decisions, and then seem totally amazed when things go wrong and clueless as to why they did.

    Few people will want to hear this truth, because it works against selfishness and those who would prefer that it gets easier to exploit others.

    Whereas it may be a phase for Miley and it is harsh to expect her to be a saint, the unfortunate truth is that she ‘represents’ women at some level and makes it less easier for those of us who prefer to be known for our values and who prefer to be seen as women of good character.

    For her own good though I hope she grows out of it/ or past it.

  58. Joana says:

    I think everything is pretty much in this letter. Women are half the planet, half the species, and 21 centuries on they are still, and ever more, subject to barbaric violence and treated as second rate human beings. People are generally more outraged by violence or even just negative comments on homossexuals, blacks or immigrants, than they are when it is directed against women. It disturbs me to my very core. Still, nothing will change if women in the developed world, the ones who still have the least bad situation, don’t respect themselves and let themselves be exploited. A role-model or not you are always responsible for the choices you make. And the effect they have in the world around you.

  59. Nofyah Shem Tov says:

    I’m actually curious what Madonna has to say about all this.

    That aside, I cringe to think about secular Israeli girls watching this and copying Miley. We have enough problems in Israel with promiscuity without “help”.

    Thanks for your input, Matt.

  60. Devorah says:

    I’m with Anjali. It’s interesting talking about Miley, I suppose, and more interesting talking about Sinead to me, anyhow, but what about Robin, who is older and supposedly wiser?
    Miley will laugh to the bank, and possibly cringe at the footage in a few years, if it’s of interest to anyone.
    She’s young enough that she can clean up her image and it will go away, and she can make a new impression while still young.
    I don’t think Miley is having relationship problems that I can see as a result of her performance.

    • Maggie says:

      http://themattwalshblog.com/2013/08/28/dear-son-dont-let-robin-thicke-be-a-lesson-to-you/st

      This is a great blog post that points a finger at Robin Thicke, not Miley. whether male, female, young, old… it’s pretty tough to gain any real respect from others if you don’t exhibit any respect for yourself

      • Devorah says:

        I have to respect Miley, while many don’t see why. She contributed to her family with her own work at a young age, when her father’s income had to be waning. She just lacks the social context to understand what’s happening right now and what the changes to her image mean. She finds the preoccupation with sex comical and she’s making fun of it, not really getting that others aren’t feeling the same sense of enlightenment. She’s experimenting with it and is learning what the consequences mean. I don’t think she actually lacks self-respect, just an understanding of how the social relationships around her work.
        No matter how enlightened you want to be, other people are following those rules.
        If you understand those relationships, it’s hard to understand how someone will behave who does not.

  61. Roberta says:

    Thank you, Sinead O’Connor, for taking the time to write this letter to Miley Cyrus. The wisdom spoken is what every mother should teach her daughters. Many of us have not been taught anything by our mothers, except to defer to men and let them be in charge. The consequences of this is that many of us have to spend years, decades, trying to figure it all out. It leads to bad decisions and the inability to choose. We don’t listen to ourselves, because we have been taught to ignore ourselves. It’s time for women to recognize that women have power in their own feminine nature, which is caring, loving, and assertive about expecting good behavior from men. We can only be manipulated in a derogatory manner if we allow it. Sounds like Miley Cyrus is allowing selfish, manipulative men to run her life and show. They have probably convinced her that it’s a good idea to market herself as a sexual object. I agree with everything Sinead said in her letter. Now, let’s hope Miley reads it and pays attention.

  62. Anoushka says:

    Chapeau! Somebody had to stand up to remind this girl of these vanishing morals and values!

  63. amana says:

    I agree…But i feel as though they never learn. They are sooo consumed in the industry they are blinded to how they are slowly destroying the respect people have for them and the respect they have for themselves…soooo sad!

  64. Rachel says:

    I prefer another female artist’s response to this letter:

    http://amandapalmer.net/blog/20131003/

    It’s definitely worth a read.

    • Lisa C. says:

      Yes! Yes! Thanks for that. Gotta love Amanda’s liberty. And her awesome husband Neil Gaiman. Although I feel we shouldn’t expose ourselves for the tastes of men, we shouldn’t hide ourselves or inhibit our expression for them either. After all, Amanda got this amazing man who was stunned that he fell for this woman who is naked a LOT. I’m pretty sure she won him by being unapologetically who she is.

      I think Miley’s not a very good dancer and maybe we saw way too much of her tongue… but I prefer to live in a world where we can do as we please without shame, and take responsibility for it, and stop judging each other and ourselves… that gives us much more freedom to evolve naturally, not just cover our bodies and ourselves and our fears and our eyebrow-raising moments in the cloak of dignity.

  65. anonymous says:

    I agree with Sinead and that it’s a matter that should be taken seriously, as I remember being a 13 year old girl in the early 1990s, and the music videos and artists were like a role model for me. They were what I considered how to be “cool” or accepted amongst my peers. So now we are seeing women in music videos with a lot less clothes on and as sex objects and some even showing violence and messages of killing in the videos.
    I also noticed a trend in fashion with young girls today wearing a lot less clothes and being more sexually active today compared to when I was a teen. This means that the artists in the music/entertainment industry do have an influence over the youth. Therefore they are responsible in showing good values and what high value women really are. The young girls today seem to be unaware of this (due to brainwashing of the media and the entertainment industry) and they feel valued by showing off their sexuality and beauty, rather than being modest and showing what’s in their minds.

  66. Luiszi says:

    I really did not like the terms used in the lather.
    To be called prostitute so many times, must have distracted Mile from the rest of the letters contest..

    Some one must get involved since the father aperently is not..
    But to get suth a letter from some one you dont know, telling you in those terms that you are being used and becaming a prostitute, must be very revolting.
    I would have done it very diferently.. But i would have done something!

    • Lezly says:

      Although Sinead’s general message was worth making, I agree that Sinead’s letter could have been better phrased, then Miley may have been less likely to rebel against it. I’m all for liberty for women but Amanda seems to put too much emphasis on women gaining this through dressing sexually, if they so wish. Of course women have the right to be sexy but we can do that in a tasteful way and not in a sleazy way. Most of the timeless female celebrity sex symbols never completely exposed themselves naked for all the public to see and personally I don’t think the current over sexed media gives women freedom. I also believe that each of us have a reasonability to express our sexuality in a tasteful way. I think Miley’s video was tasteless. Most of her fans are probably teenagers. Teenagers are confused enough about sex and sexuality and Miley isn’t helping. Miley might be pulling the strings with the decisions regarding exploiting her sexuality and not the music industry. Either way I think women should not turn-on one another because of this issue but rather direct our young woman in a respectful manner.

  67. Majka says:

    Yes, yes, yes!
    Yet, Sinnead, I would prefere not to confuse the INNOCENCE with NAIVTY (as Your way, in one place, of expressing the thing may perheps suggest?)
    I’m convinced (as You surely are too) that our heart has to remain INNOCENT for us to remain fully alive. Not cynical but capable of recognising our own truth and the truth of the others.
    But, on the other hand, we have to stop to be NAIV. To be able to protect this INNOCENCE from becoming a powerless offer of abuse.
    It demands a consious effort. Precisly the effort and the courage You two are showing. Thank You, Matthew! Thank You, Sinnead!

  68. Kirsty says:

    ” If you have an innocent heart you can’t recognise those who do not”

    The biggest life lesson learnt that turns you into a woman… Unfortunately you have to go through it yourself before you understand it.

    Sinead was spot on with her open letter, if you respect someone enough to base your style on them then listen when they are trying to help you. Again this only comes with age & experience on each individual’s ‘journey’

  69. Marianne says:

    An inspiring letter but easier said than done when those in power manipulate you and have reduced your self esteem. I will use this advice to inform a decision I have to make in my own working life. Thank you for sharing xxx

  70. Haley Smith says:

    As a 22 year old woman myself breaking into the music industry these words do not ring more true. The record label truly does own you and your body. They make revenue off of YOUR talent which had nothing to do with any of the creative process at all… It’s infuriating! And seeing Miley who is merely two years younger than me soak it up like a sponge saddens me.
    It saddens me because she gives the impression to us young women that the only way to get attention is to sexually objectify yourself and she proves that point in her music video.
    I love the fact that Sinead expressed contain for Miley when no one else will. Someone has too.
    The fact that Miley’s father is sitting back and watching this however disgusts me.

    On a complete side note, I would love to personally thank you one day Matthew Hussey for the inspiring and empowering work you do focused on women.. As a young woman I have taken your program to heart and enforced these values in my daily life and am a much happier woman. I am so grateful that I found your work at such a young and impressionable age because you have changed my life. I grew up watching women be sexually objectified, treated like crap by men and settling for less than they deserve.

    So thank you for allowing me to find the strength and courage I never even thought I had.
    Love Haley x

  71. G.J.S. says:

    I hope she takes such excellent advice

  72. Michelle says:

    WOW this is a long message and I knew what it said so I did not have to realy read it. The reason I knew what it said is because the truth is the truth nd sometimes it’s easy to see. If all you got is your skin then you got nothing an interview with a model red yesterday “even my heart is plastic” Sincerely and clearly what ever she is facing being slut is not going to help her to love her self at all every woman can comment men promote this crap because they want to see more of it. But what is woman that is not man is a need to be protected a need to shelter the precious valuables and that is what makes us a woman. For her to ignore the mind boggling problems we face today with young girls on facebook and on and on- shows a lack of respect for women and for herself. A diamond is a diamond because its rare not shared with everybody. when your husband looks at you and knows your dime-dozen when you look at yourself and know your dime a dozen its shameful

  73. Melissa says:

    This for me was a must read indeed, I have forwarded it to all the female friends and family members who are young as well, that I care about.

    I really respect Sinead for reaching out to her, Sinead was not in anyway judgemental or condescending. She was just sharing adivice and wisdom that one can only gain from making mistakes as well and learning from them that is how we gain maturity is it not. With that said I hope Miley has an open mind and is receptive to this advice, it was obvious via the tone of the letter that this advice was given from a place of genuine concern and in the spirit of love and sisterhood.

    I also learnt a lot from it as well, you have to respect yourself “Many’s the woman mistook lust for love. If they want you sexually that doesn’t mean they give a fuck about you” that really hit home for me. We spend so much time and money on makeup, clothes, the gym trying to create an image to rein the men (don’t get me wrong I think taking care of yourself and dressing well is important to feel confident and about yourself in public and private)in whether consciously or unconsciously and in the end we need to be vigilant not to confuse lust and desire with love, because we will only end up being used. Also “If you have an innocent heart you can’t recognize those who do not” that is so true, which is why it is important to get to know a person as well to see whether his intentions towards you are for good and for your benefit as well.

    I understand that she is trying to shed the image of Hanna Montana but other fellow Disney child star Alum such as Anne Hathaway, Hillary Duff, Selena Gomez,Justin Timberlake,Ryan Gossling and Kerry Russel have managed to successfully do so through illustrating their talent through their craft, let the talent do the work instead of an oversexed image.

    This was a really good read for me, I enjoyed it, thank’s for sharing Matt. Much love from a happy customer/follower.

  74. Jules says:

    Wow!!! A very cool and passionate letter and very good advice, sadly I think some girls only learn the hard way and have to hit rock bottom before they realise their mistakes. I’ve made bad choices in the past and ended up hating the way I felt afterwards like I had no respect for myself. It’s only now with age and experience you can look back and think I would never want to do those things again.
    I suppose respect for yourself and your self worth should be taught from a young age then maybe girls would be stronger when they are faced with all the temptations of modern life.

  75. Holly says:

    This made me feel so sad when I read this. Thankyou for sharing it with us and thankyou to Sinead for sending this to Miley, that’s a sure sign that someone really cares.

    Their is so much truth and wisdom in the message, I felt it to be very empowering and had a strong impact when I was reading.

    Gosh that’s something I wasn’t expecting so much of from a message. The way Sinead writes makes me think of life and men in genural, such as this could be applied to real life.

    I admire Sinead and I wish that I had someone like this in my life in the past when I really needed it. I feel that I was left to fend for myself though and even now I feel that my few on life is with inocence.

    This letter is geniuse!

    Your right also Matt, I hate people who judge and dig at other peoples character. Were is the love? And why can’t show more compassion and understanding to others and probably the people who are been judged the most are the ones who need the most care and understanding.

    I really wish people would be more open minded instead of judging and attacking.

  76. rachel says:

    I think its sad we have an acceptance of this kind of expression which can only be deemed as self destructive and self degrading. I am speaking from experience. You don’t have to be elected in Government to be responsible or a Role Model! I am tired of watching these influences in modern society Sexualise Children and Women we are not sex objects! No one was put on this earth to degrade themselves. I agree totally with Sinead O Connor who herself is well aware of the trappings not only for those in the Entertainment Industry but in every day life. Miley Cyrus performed that sexual degradation in front of a very young audience. There lies the responsibility part. To really love is to tell someone the truth that is not called judgement that is called being brave enough to LOVE. That is what Sinead did here and I applause her for it because she is the only one it appears who is willing to speak truth. And she also does not condemn Miley for she is well aware of the power of these destructive influences around her. Anyone with a real heart would want to see only the best for Miley in this situation.
    I believe in empowering Women to understand their real worth in themselves. We are not toy things just there to be used in fantasy. We have qualities that surpass so much more than that. We have needs a woman to be loved respected and be special. We have the ability to lead Governments! To be strong! Motherhood is not a Vocation below us but on an equal to us to our design and a beautiful gift. We are a gift to the world and any good mans prize. We want commitment loyalty and the real deal. Don’t settle for second best ever!

  77. Viola says:

    I’ve cried when I watched this video

    http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=QYjl7e0qnhQ

  78. Jill says:

    I’m about to open a huge can of worms but I feel our society has become too open with sex meaning there’s nothing sacred about it. Sometimes I feel we are no greater then our pet dogs if we want sex we just go get it don’t worry about love or commitment just worry about how you’re gonna get your fix.
    If I remember correctly Matt has said you can be too much of one thing and that’s not good. She seems to be the kind of chick that turns into the one night stand.

  79. Jenny says:

    Hi Matt,
    big fan of yours here.

    I think Sinead’s message to Miley was well intended, a message that from female to female, stemmed from a place of experience, wisdom, and care, and although I appreciate the sentiments and agree with her warning and perhaps Miley will too, one must tend to their own garden and stop worrying about what’s going on or growing in other people’s gardens. Yes, she’s a public figure and her messages are visible to the world. Still, we have the authority to filter out as well as take in what we deem to be appropriate. There are many other artists who continually spread much more tainted messages out there, only they receive less attention for it because they aren’t half naked while they do it. And although I completely agree and find the performance to be disturbing, some wise person once said “The greatest gift you can bestow upon yourself and the world is the gift of knowing yourself”- author unknown

    Miley is an entertainer, she grows up in front of the audience. She’s in the process of maturing and discovering herself and no one can rush that for her. If people leave her alone, they will find that one day she has grown up and chances are if she hasn’t died she will most likely be ok. My message is: stop imposing. Let the kid grow up and do what’s necessary for herself, high value or not. Everyone has a unique path and a unique way of learning and growing. God doesn’t impose a way for others, why does man?

  80. annie says:

    Great message for all women, and I have to say its a great message for anyone out there that feels obligated to objectify themselves for people to gain attention and respect. When in doubt it actually does the exact opposite. Sad to say how the media has this effect on very young people or how it can prey on the weak and people fall victim to these idealizations.

    I have to say I have been following with this entire feud, and what is worse is how the media takes pleasure in this to gain “viewers” or “make money” off of this because its “drama.” Not to judge, but I don’t think someone’s mental illness should be made fun of or mocked. (on miley’s part – mocking Sinead’s mental illness) We all have our own personal demons that we all deal with and no one should put that out in the public and mock that when people have been victims of abuse in any form. Mocking her is mocking tons of people out there who are struggling through this and that I would say is crossing the line. It’s a form of bullying and no one needs that.

    either or Sinead message is great for men as well… since men always have lyrics that are super sexual and the way to get a women is through drinking, partying, drugs, and saying nice things etc etc. Since the entertainment industry is filled with many men. however, On both parts… change starts for both sexes… but its just sad… to see these things happen, and knowing young girls watch these things since the internet nowadays are so easily accessible and when parents don’t’ have the time to censor or block websites, or their friends show them…. influences.

  81. sonia rogers says:

    I think this is a great message to Miley. For her role model to take the time to write this to her is really precious. I think this also goes for all the teenage or young female ladies in the show business world. They don’t really give a fuck… very true. I hope Miley takes this message to mind and heart and see what Ms. O’Connor is trying to say.
    Thank you Ms. O’Connor. Some of us needed this advice.

  82. Christine says:

    Well done Sinaed. Regardless of Miley’s age, she should want to be a good role model. I was disgusted to hear that a pole was taken and Miley is who most men in their 40’s wants to have sex with.

Read previous post:
Overcome Jealousy In 3 Minutes (iHeartRadio Preview)

I really shouldn't be doing this, but I had to give you a sneak-preview of my new show 'Love Life'...

Close