The Compliment He’s Dying To Hear

Today I’m going to give you a little something to GLOW with any guy you’re around.

It’s a simple tip to get on his mind, and create a lasting memory he’ll never forget…

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50 Responses to The Compliment He’s Dying To Hear

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  1. Eman says:

    Hey Matthew! I watched almost all of your videos because they all seemed really interesting and they provided me with a ton of information. Anyway, I am wondering if you can help me out with my current situation. I say that because there are things you say to do that I either can’t do due to religious beliefs or I’m just too shy. Anyway, what I’m trying to say is that it would be nice if you could email me help after I explain how things are for me. Thank you very much!

  2. Sally says:

    I have just experienced a relationship with a narcissist who was so full of his own self importance that he talked about nothing else, every conversation was diverted to him and he would seek admiration and acknowledgement in all sorts of ways. I gave lots of positive comments and didn’t get a lot back. I was idealised for a short while and then discarded. Not a pleasant experience and one that maybe you could help other women avoid?

  3. Goldberry says:

    It’s wonderful to see the beauty and quirkiness in other people, and to share that with them. At the same time I agree with some other commenters and would not like to do it as a means to an end. I mean, I would do it to make someone feel good but not to make them think about me and like me. I do feel like that’s a kind of manipulation.

  4. April says:

    Hi, Matthew!

    I’m a photographer and I’m a natural at complimenting people. If I see someone, male or female, who has beautiful eyes or a nice smile, I tell them so.

    This is becoming a problem for me. I seem to be meeting a lot of men with very low self-esteem who think that because I complimented them, I want to be more than a friend. And when I reject them, they go into pursuit mode.

    Any ideas?
    April

  5. Dynielle says:

    This is something I totally have missed as it can feel a little vulnerable at times but is truly fundamental in letting others know that we SEE THEM!
    YES!! Love it! Thanks!

  6. Jacqueline says:

    Fabulous insightful info. on seeing beyond the 10% that is frequently complimented and complimenting on that unique gift; per your video. As always, THANK YOU for your insight and perception!!!!

  7. Maz says:

    Great video.

  8. Jill says:

    You wanna know what compliment I’m dying to hear? Persistence is the key ;)

  9. Kyri says:

    Hey Matthew, how are you doing? Lovely video by the way! :D
    I was just wondering, how would you compliment a guy who you don’t really know, without sounding creepy. I believe that he’s unaware of who I am, so I would love it if we got to know eachother :)

  10. Susie says:

    Inciteful video – ty Mr H

    Complimenting someone especially if it’s from the heart / genuine and sincere can completely change the energy around a conversation. I have known it to make for more interesting conversations with people in my own experience.

    I’m having to press the flesh ( i.e. go out and meet more people) in life these days and it’s great to mix it up and have different sorts of conversations with different people.

    I saw one of Matt’s other videos where he said you can always ask random questions of others as opposed to what they work as etc – The twenty questions approach for example. As that also opens up great conversations also and having experimented with that approach also – I would tend to agree so putting the two together may also make for interesting conversations – I am going to go experiment and see.

    Thank-you for pointing me in the right direction MH

  11. Kaire Goreth says:

    Hi matt.. How can i get all your episodes without having to buy them?…Thanx. I enjoy every thing about u.

  12. Lily says:

    Matt, what about ppl who give fake compliments, with fake smiles? I wish u did a video on how to politely answer to them, like the tip you gave on how to turn things around when at this radio show commented on u wearing pants after a flight? Please!!!

  13. Leesia says:

    I always stop myself from giving him too much compliments though because I think he’ll get a big head and know how much I like him then use me or hurt me like my ex’s.. once they know how much you like them they can be ruthless I never compliment him unless he compliments me then I don’t feel like it’s one sided or something

  14. dawn says:

    Just wish I can get him to want me as much as I want him..

  15. Catherine Angel says:

    Matt, this is so true. Giving a sincere compliment makes you stand out in the other person’s mind, and sows the seeds for connection. This is especially important when you have been in a relationship with someone for a while, and it is easy to stop noticing (and commenting on) the things that make the person special to you. So often, there can be great love between two people, but they slide into noticing – and commenting on – the things they don’t like about each other.ongoing appreciation goes a long way. Often, it is as easy as saying “thank you” for something the other person did, calling attention the the fact that you appreciate their efforts, even when it is for mundane things that you may feel they should be doing anyway.

  16. Emily says:

    This is so true. I’ve had experiences like this that stick out in my mind–like a much older cousin saying that he liked that I was so upfront and would tell it like it is. I was 18 maybe, but I still remember how awesome that made me feel. I’m going to strive to do this and look for the other 90% this week. I’m excited!

  17. Ceciel says:

    I didn’t even get the chance to see the clip it said error. I feel very sad I only wish it could work I have watched a lot of matts clips but not the compliment he’s dying to hear,i am actually dying to know what the compliments might be it’s just unfortunate.

  18. Beth says:

    I love to compliment people to make them feel good about themselves it makes me feel good to give them a smile for the day. Unfortunately not everyone is out to do it for a positive reason and you just have to watch those people that they aren’t out to use it for they’re own gain instead of helping someone else!

  19. Paula says:

    I liked the idea of this but yes there are some people out there that compliment someone and their intention is to manipulate them and get what they want and basically use them.

    I value compliments more from people that I trust and understand their character.

    I had a friend (now an ex) compliment my then boyfriend and at first I thought it was innocent but she would use it as a tool to manipulate him and basically get him to be at her beck and call. Obviously this happened after we broke up but her complimenting occurred while we were dating so the seed was being planted for manipulation.

    I just think it needs to be acknowledged that people take advantage of others and complimenting someone is one way to do it. It’s actually quite an evil way to do it but it looks innocent

  20. Liane says:

    You Matt, can change the world with that one post.

    It’s so true how one guenuine positive statement can impact a person for a long time to cone….and of course have them think positively of you in return is always a nice benefit.

    Thanks for this post :-)

  21. Nadja says:

    Ok Matt so here it goes… Your eyes are truly magnificent. Whenever I watch your videos I’m drawn into them. Not because of the colour, although the colour is very special too, it’s because there is a depth in them and a playfulness that is charming and attractive.
    I’m going to give more compliments out more freely starting about 15 seconds ago ;) xo

  22. Maradoll Mynx says:

    Matt…It’s men like you who make the world a better place. I love the idea of seeking out the good things in other people and bringing them to light. Thanks for a great start to my morning!

  23. Plain Jane says:

    I recently told a guy I thought was out of my league that I had heard he is a great lover (true!) and he immediately gave me his number and invited me to find out:)

  24. Penny says:

    Great information

  25. Skye says:

    Matt… what I like about you is the kid in you. No matter how big you get, how many talk shows you go to, how many interviews you do or how many books you sell out, you remain grounded with an innocence in your heart that is truly endearing. I’m sure that in your romantic relationships, one of the things you love the most is being a complete kid with her, joking and doing silly things. To me, that exudes in your little videos. You’re adorable and totally loveable. Thanks again for your awesome little videos – they’re the best. xxx

  26. kish says:

    I love giving compliments to people but I have seen that many people then start thinking very highly of themselves and thinking that I must be somehow “less” than them if I admire them for something. This happens with both men and women but more with men. These men then start giving me unsolicited advice on how I can be more like them. Many of them won’t even say thank you and start showing off even more. Oh, and then they don’t really start liking me (or maybe they do) but they get the confidence to go hit on the really hot girls. I have NEVER been asked out by ANYone to whom I have given a compliment.

    Even women, especially when the compliments pertain to their looks, immediately start looking down upon me as somehow ugly and ordinary and adopt a very condescending tone towards me after that. This happens even if they outwardly show modesty or gratitude. Inside, it is as if the compliment confirms that they are ‘above’ me in some way.

    The other irritating thing that women do is then try to return the compliment as a social obligation which ends up sounding like an insult because it seems that they *have* to find something good in me but can’t because it is SO hard and then say something really silly/frivolous.

    So that’s why I fear giving compliments to people unless I know they are genuinely humble.

    So beware, this doesn’t work on anyone, all the time.

    • sacha says:

      I was writing this whole essay on how to get people to be grateful for your compliments and get guys to try to woo you, but you will get a genuine guide to it all by watching Matthew’s videos. He changed my whole outlook on guys and I’m so confident now. I’m single but not for long. ;) and everything just feels more relaxed. I feel like I could get any guy I want. I even tried using his flirting techniques on a cute guy I work with and the guy flirts with me and tries to start convos with me all the time now. So watch his videos and really take his advice to heart. I promise you won’t feel like people are putting you down or to the side once you just change your way of thinking and approaching people.

      • kish says:

        Really? What exactly did you do that worked for you? I have tried smiling, making eye contact etc I laugh at jokes,try to be feminine, engage in witty repartee, pretty much everything. I have seen Matt’s videos and read his advice too–sure I get party invitations, perhaps I am generally liked and seen as ‘fun’ (I actually crave a deep romantic connection). It has generally improved my social life. But romantic interest? Zero. Well, maybe from fat guys, flirts, players who hit on anything that moves and guys no one else wants.

      • Matthew Hussey says:

        Awww lovely to know Sacha!! xx

    • Matthew Hussey says:

      Good to read your thoughts Kish! It can be quite tricky sometimes but like you said, when you know they are genuinely humble, compliments are great. I’d say give them anyway to others and let them do with it what they please.

      Have a lovely Sunday! x

      • kish says:

        Matt!!! You replied to my comments :-) yay

        Well, that is very zen like. Ok, I’ll give them when I see something really worth complimenting so I won’t feel bad about their reactions.

  27. gg says:

    This what you talking about clarified my analyzed situation, I was searching for an answer. But words make it really that simple. What a power.

    It happened to me lately when a person I really didn’t like, came to me and wished me happy birthday. After this he was changed in my eyes and I just start liking him.

    This situation taught me how powerful the words can be and how much simple “happy birthday” can change the view about a person.

    We cannot judge people in advance if we don’t know them. Every person has its own sides of positive and negative. And the best we can do to our selves when interacting with them is accepting them.

    I was analyzing this situation the whole evening.

  28. Vinnie says:

    LittleGreyCat,

    I don’t think it’s awkward at all to be and show gratitude to your doctor/patient, in fact I’m more than sure that that person would be more than grateful herself/himself if you did! I think people tend to put themselves some barrier when there’s a specific job-related relationship (I used to be a waitress and I would be really grateful when people went beyond that point and acted with me rather as a person than just a waitress!) I think it would be very well welcome from that person if you gave them a card (to start off) to say thank you, and tell them how much you’re grateful over what they did for you, and depending on your relationship and what they actually did I’d personally not be afraid to accompany that card with either flowers or something that i’ve done myself or that I know they’d like (I paint and draw so that’s something I’d think of, but it really all depends on you and that person I’d say…) I think what matters is that you stay sensible and reasonable, and I’m really sure that person will be very happy about the intention overall, Go for it! :)

    Oh and Matthew, thanks for the video, I love those little reminders that sometimes we tend to somehow forget… when they’d simply make the world a little nicer for people…

  29. LittleGreyCat says:

    Amazing video Matthew.
    There is a person to whom I am very grateful and who has a lot qualities and values I admire. And I would love to express a bit of my gratitude / admiration.
    The problem is that we have a doctor-patient relationship and I don’t want it to be awkward.
    I’m thinking about how I can do it the right way.

    • tigress866 says:

      I work in a doctor’s office. Take this and put a personal spin on it ( modify it to your situation)…

      Doctor x, your helping me has been such a blessing and I admire your generosity, for it’s like a forgotten art in today’s society.

      I know, kinda corny, but I genuinely compliment people in that manner. Daily.
      And they glow.

  30. Jill says:

    Guess what…I’m grrrreat at giving compliments and finding strengths in others that usually go unnoticed so…I think you should help a sista out (insert cheezy smiley face)

  31. Jen says:

    I really like your video because what you said is really true! I never forgot a girl who I merely knew just complimented me on my cheekbones during a conversation. And we were not even on the topic of beauty! She told me how I had great cheekbones which is something I was not aware of until I really looked in the mirror and realised it is true and no one has ever complimented me on that.I usually get the usual – you are tall and slim……..

  32. jenn c. says:

    I have to agree that while it’s nice to be complimented on appearance there’s something about being complimented on a character trait or value that really suddenly makes you feel closer to someone. As if they had an x-ray vision moment and saw through the exterior and got a glimpse of a raw, true you.

  33. kelly duffy says:

    excellent…extroversion is perfect for me to many people in America are so introverted and afraid to speak , thankyou Matt

  34. Lyla says:

    First comment :)

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