Since I started Get the Guy in 2008, the world of dating has been turned upside down. Back then, people were embarrassed to even admit they went for a drink with someone they met on the internet.
But now… women are told that they live in a “hookup culture.” They hear that everyone is flaky (and they have to accept it). They’re told to settle for the next acceptable guy that comes along.
If you don’t buy any of these myths (and you shouldn’t), watch this video to hear my crucial first step to master your dating life in 2017…
I need more of this haha. Online dating is so frustrating these days
Off topic , Non contact period dilema ;))
My ex was given away a 3 days trip for the Champions League fenally.Business class tickets , 5 star hotel and him.
So he asked if I am free in the respective day..I have work but I did suggest he takes advantage of the opportunity (I know hes working really hard)however for me I won’t be able to make the arrangements .
I hoped to drop it there
..but no .. his brother works for the same company and has the power to ammend my roster so he suggested I use him .
I suggested in return to take his brother .
He asked me again to try .
It’s been 16 days in witch I did not initiate contact .
Going would be a step back evan though I am 100%sure I am capable of enjoying the time with him without actually expecting nothing to come out of this situation.
We used to take short trips all the time or just randomly spoil ourselves in a nice resort , in the same city ..haha yes , same city.
It is tempting yes , specially having out team playing but at the same time invloves to much times spent together etc…
So how do I decline without being dramatic and using resilience, strength , humility…can’t spin it around with my krav maga class or any other class I take …or having a dog haha , he’s weel aware all that can be arranged..well before , not at his point .
Great video! Good reminder to not compromise your standard just because the world feels impossible sometimes. Was feeling really down yesterday and started rewatching your impact series. Mood instantly lifted. Thanks for all you do!
Love this…. always thought high maintenance was a bad thing though. This guy I have been seeing called me high maintenance once…. but he said it like it was a bad thing? Is there good and bad ways to be a high maintenance woman?
I needed to hear that today!
Also where is the rest of that talk? It’s a great pep talk!
Thanks for sharing. I Neededed to hear that today.
Absolutely! Maintain your standards! On point again Matthew! ;) <3
“People become better around people who demand more”.
Love this!
I agree! My favourite new mantra!
LOVE THIS!!!
I like the message about keeping standards. I believe you are right as both men and women have optional and perceive there is more or the grass is greener. This is opposite of me. I like to find someone and work at keeping things good- I just don’t know when is enough verses be taken for granted.
Fantastic point about patience vs. being taken for granted! In a previous video, MH said “respond to reality, not to (his) reasons/excuses.” Give low investment for the low investment you receive, but always give good energy.
I almost cried. This observation was so powerful and validating and authentic. Would love to see more like this
I cried too. Yesterday, like three times.
X
Yes!!! You’ve said it!
Yep! Follow The Rules! Be a Rules Girl, because “you are a creature unlike any other”.
Dear Matthew: Two of your recent ideas have rocked my world. “His reasons do not affect my reality” and “People become better around people who demand more.” Thank you, Matthew. You’re a game changer.
Awesome video Matthew! I absolutely agree with your sentiments! Thanks for sharing this post with us! Most women do settle for less.
Sincerely,
Michele
Can you talk about “older” women. Notice I put older in quotes. Yes I’m older but young in my heart and head. Problem, I just got divorced after 36 years of marriage and being with him a total of 41 years. How in the heck do I even begin to date again or even find someone who would want a person in their fifties! You always have great advice for younger people but I bet there are tons of us “older” ones who would like to find a love again, and does it have to be someone olde?
I’m with you Cindy. I became a widow after 30 years of marriage. I’ve been with for 37 years. We’re not 20 or 30, but we’re still alive. It’s like being dumped from one world into another.
Hey Cindy, if you follow more of Matt, you´ll see him saying that his advice is for women of any age and culture. I struggle myself thinking, “How about people in small towns?” But, then I guess it´s still the same advice. It starts with going out of your house more and starting conversations with anyone ;)
Wow Cindy same for me married 37 years but together 44. Now two years single divorced. It is all new for me. You just have to get out there and experience dating to know what works for you. With everything think of it as learning experiences. Have fun have confidence but specially love and take care of yourself first. Deb
Matthew, you are dead on right!
I was in bar watching boxing and with my x he place arm around me and cuddling up watch tv. The bar was full of men. I bobed over the road to get the Chinese and missed the end of the fight. On the way home my x said he we were acting like we where in a relationship and we are not going to be. I was upset over this moment I just enjoying the attention. I watch the video and it made me think about my x and how I put up with his bad behaviors and I run after him or I jump to make myself with excitement and make time for him.
Becoming a higher maintenance? Thank you! I was told several times I was that and it sounded like a dirty word…!! And there is nothing wrong about having standards and expecting more from life then most! I’m an entrepreneur, the high achiever type BTW.. :)
Giving myself permission being a high maintenance so I’m treated well is definitely something I needed.. Thank you!
Hi Stephen, I really enjoy your blog! Whilst in the bath today sipping a cracking cup of tea (yeah, I’m British), I had an idea for a future subject which I’d love to get to yourself & Matthew. I realise that’s going to be a challenge and hey, why should you trust some random girl to come up with anything decent? Let’s just say that I think Matthew is a ‘Unicorn Maker’ – hope you get the reference, please contact me if you’d like me to elaborate :)
I agree with you Matt however, there is a scarcity of men in my country so being a high value would mean accepting the possibility that I will stay single. By the way, will there be a pdf version of your books?