If you’re tired of trying to figure out relationships on your own, Matthew Hussey is the partner you’ve been searching for.
As the leading dating expert and confidence coach for women, Matthew has helped millions of women get the love life of their dreams through his New York Times bestselling book, sold-out live seminars, and powerful training videos.
His proven approach inspires women to find love through advice that is honest, authentic and practical; so that they not only get the relationship they deserve but feel confident and in control of their own happiness.
When I was a teenager, I got asked out by a girl I wasn’t into. Actually, she didn’t ask me out. Her friend, acting as her emissary, came up to me one day and said: “Sarah wants to go out with you.” I wasn’t into Sarah, but I loved that Sarah liked me. I loved that anyone liked me. But I did what any sensible teenager would do, and, with a rehearsed indifference only teenagers are capable of, visually shrugged it off to make it clear that this knowledge meant nothing to me. The next day the messenger came back to ask me more directly: “Will you go out with Sarah?” Once again I said no, but actually said it this time, then ran off to throw an empty Coca-Cola can at a friends head, or whatever important work I was doing. On the third day, there she was again, chief deputy matchmaker: “You should go out with Sarah! Will you?”
This time, I said yes. “Really! Are you sure?” “Of course I’m not sure, I told you no the last two days you maniac. But I’m saying yes right now aren’t I? So just be happy. Stop confusing me.”
I still remember this moment, not because it lasted with Sarah. You will, I’m afraid, be shocked and saddened to know that such a beginning did not herald the great romance of my teenage years. But why did I say yes? That’s what I still remember. I said yes because believed I was never going to have the courage to talk to a girl I actually had feelings for. And given that my status on the playground depended on my ability to get a girl, I may as well take what I could get, which happened to be someone I didn’t want.
A couple of years later, still paralyzed by a lethal cocktail of shyness, introversion and a terrible fear of rejection, I had another thought:
If I don’t overcome this, I will spend my entire life being chosen by people I don’t want instead of choosing the people I do want.
This was the beginning of the journey that led to the creation of Get The Guy. No, not because I decided to switch lanes and try to get myself a guy, but because I began as my own first client. I set out on a mission to become bolder, a better communicator, more charismatic, more confident, and ultimately to go after what I actually wanted instead of settling for what I was getting.
My passion for what I do today never started with women; it started with me. Years later, when I would get to the point of helping women, I would see how much my own fears had in common with the women I was coaching. I would see wonderful, deserving women settling in all sorts of ways that were distressing to witness.
Often, they would settle for men they didn’t want because they themselves were waiting to be chosen instead of doing the choosing. This waiting led to frustration, a lack of choice, and a loss of hope that the right person would ever show up. So eventually, they gave up and gave in to the next guy who came along.
But I would also see them settle in a different, perhaps even more dangerous way. When they did, on rare occasion, find a guy they really liked, they were so happy to find a real connection that they would settle for bad behavior, unreliability and low investment on his part, just to hold onto it.
So much of this isn’t our fault. It’s the result of being sold many myths about love and dating. The myth that women shouldn’t make the move, which leaves them playing the waiting game until it’s too late.
The myth that “love conquers all”, which becomes a recipe for chasing someone who is treating us badly, simply because our feelings for them are so strong. These ideas guide us towards heartbreak and regret, and yet so often they are subconscious.
In the last 14 years, I have built the No.1 organization in the world that is helping women to transform their love lives by becoming more competent at dating, more confident in themselves, and creating an incredible life to share with someone. All of this applies whether you have been single for 5 minutes, 5 years, are going through heartbreak, or are navigating a relationship or “situation-ship”) you are already in.
I believe the key to a great love life is developing a great love for life, as well as an even greater love for yourself.
There are also a great many practical skills that are essential in dating and communication that I teach in my programs to help you along the way.
And, just so we understand each other, my goal is not for you to find a relationship—though if that’s what you want, we’ll make that happen together. My goal is your happiness and peace of mind. If that means finding an amazing person to share your life with, we’ll do that. If it means finding the courage to leave a toxic situation you’re in right now, we’ll do that—I’m just as proud of the breakups I’ve caused as the relationships I’ve helped to create. And if what you want more than anything is to fall more in love with your life today, so you can experience peace and happiness even without a relationship, we’ll do that too.
Whatever phase you’re in, I’m here
for you every step of the way.