You Could Save Your Close Relationships With This ONE Small Change

If you’re anything like me you’ll have certain relationships in your life that you wish you could change. It might be your parents, a close friend, a sibling, a cousin…people with whom you always get stuck in the same stale behavioural patterns. Maybe you fight, maybe you get jealous and competitive, maybe you always feel frustrated by each other’s bad habits, maybe you wish you could show them your true emotions. All you know is that you’ve felt stuck for a long time now, and you wish you could feel differently about it.

In this week’s blog I show you a new approach you can take to any relationship you want to change in this exact moment, and reveal how you can shake off that tired old dynamic so that you feel ten times more connected to that person than you did before.

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18 Replies to “You Could Save Your Close Relationships With This ONE Small Change”

  • It was the right video at the right moment. Have not spent time with my parents for many years, they came to visit me for a month… I still have two weeks to make the small changes:)

  • Matthew, like the short and sweet style of this video. Suits with the topic. ;-) You are my hero and since I’m going intensive trough your impact modules you’ ve got even more of my respect. Amazing work on your part. Since I’ve become to know you in the last two years trough your videos I keep thinking, why we don’t learn this stuff in school. The tricky part would be, that it can be used for manipulation. I was dying to hear this content. I struggle since years a lot with the relationship I have with my dad. I’m gonna start give him more regular a hug and tell him everyday something of my day.
    The interesting part of this is, that we do this little change for us. It’s not all about them, instead about our strength and ability to improve. Kind Regards, Olivia

  • I just wanted to say first of all that you look great in this video..:) and as always thank you for your precious advice. The way you speak and present things just makes everything sound and feel simple..

  • I have been talking to a football player for about 6 years yes I do love him but we are long distance I don’t know what to do I am a medical assistant and I want to know if I move and get a apartment where he lives is it the right thing to do we are not in a relationship I will love to spend my life with him need help

  • Hi Matthew,

    I just wanted to express my gratitude for your videos. You’re doing an outstanding job and are an inspiration to a lot of people. Thanks for always exploring diverse topics, not all necessarily related to love. Keep up the good work :)

  • I was in tears this morning because of the path one of my important relationships seems to be going down and then I found your email with this message in my inbox. It is exactly what I needed and I guess in a way it’s the universe telling me not to give up.

    Thank you Matthew!

  • What a great message! We forget about little things we can do or say that will change our relationship and make ourselves better. Love it!

  • Mathew
    I want to start off by thanking you soooo amazingly much for this video. I have had some issues with my father who was married 26 years to my mom and then just in January decided to remarry a woman who I barley even know. You have given me the greatest gift. This woman sends off vibes that she’s only in it for the money and I am the only child of my father’s with a son who is 4. I get the feeling she tries to alienate us from my father and is even getting him to sell the family home I grew up in. I loved how you are making it possible in my mind to change our relationship with her, and funny enough when I came back from my 2 month trip to Ireland to see my mom’s side of the family they told me the same thing. Try to be close even though it’s tough enough to try to be nice after everything that’s changed in my life. Thank you and I look forward to the next video coach!
    Love always
    Megan Jenkins xx

  • Hi Mathew,

    thanks for Your constant work and sharing Your thoughts especially if it goes beyond “how to get …” to “how to give”
    For all of us out there life is about the balance of giving and taking. I follow You since about a year and You´d helped me a lot to appreciate life in general and relationships aspecially again.

    “The Best Things In Life Are Free – Just See”

    Gina from Berlin in Germany

  • I’m still struggling with communication with someone who is abbusive. Who doesn’t want to measure their words when talking with me, but demands me to mesure my words. When I’m struggling to talk on a non violent way, call me bureaucratic. This is thought! Because the same person tells they love freedom and are respectful, but hate when are questioned, or when I just don’t agree with them. I’m trying to stick to my standards, but I can’t say I’m doing a good or bad job.

  • Hi Matthew such a long time that i’ve been on your blog to be honest abou it :( i was always writing on your blog.. but as time past by and i got bizzer i got less time to write i’m so sorry for that :) in the meanwhile alott has changed in my life than two years ago that i writed on your blog here :) i just told by than as i can remember that i was 15 years old and never got any relationship.. well now i’m 17 years and that has’nt changed either well i come on this later in this story because i have a question for you :) to be continued this story my parents gotta divorce and we have to move.. sadly :( this happens too but im now much more wiser and smarter than i was back to be hones affcourse you learn from every thing that you’ve been going through.. and i have one question for you matthew?

    well last saturday there was in my city the ColorRun..
    and i run 12 miles or km.. well i was just running and suddenly there runs a guy before me.. and he was saying to me are you passing me by this time? i was saying yeah i pass you by this time i gotta make a shot haha :P

    than after that while i run a another round he was still running too so he did run before me haha :P
    and i said omg.. it’s harder than i thought to run this and than got his attention i dont know… well i saw me and he ask me is it okay if i run next to you? i said affcourse you can run next to me :D okay he said and we had a really nice conversation after that and he runned the last few miles/km with me.. in they and he had give me a high-five and when i told him i gotta go home he gave a hand and said thank you for running with me :)
    i was so flatterd to be honest for the first time in my life..

    back home i searched him on facebook :)
    btw i did ask first his name otherwise i could never possiblity find him on facebook haha :P
    so i sended him a friendrequest on facebook and he accepted it.. whe where talking about the ColorRun afterwards etc.. and than i ask him what are your hobby’s
    and after one day waiting for a response and said..

    and he reapeted my question?

    like this.. —> What my hobby’s are :D

    and i said back: well dont you have any hobby’s?

    still waiting for a response to that …

    what should i think of this conversation matthew Please help me!!

    lovely greetz Thirza From the Netherlands :)

    1. Hi, Thirza!

      The ball is in his court. He knows how to get in contact with you. Don’t be the one to reach out again.

      Matt will say to live a full, happy life, pursue your goals, know your standards and keep them high. Further develop yourself, love yourself, be your own best friend. If you keep doing this, you will attract someone. Matt would say to only give him as much importance as HE invests in you.

      Best of luck!

  • Hi, Matt.
    I chose to ‘end a relationship’ with an uncle, my mom’s brother, because he was a messed up, toxic person whom I decided I was better off with not having him in my life. I wished him well though. Fast forward 5 years, and we started communicating again, and I was very warm and open towards him once again – dropped my guard and had zero ego in dealing with him. In no time at all, I was reminded why I decided to cut him off years ago! So it isn’t about me not willing to change and ‘be nice,’ but as an adult who takes responsibility for my actions, this may seem harsh, but sometimes it’s better to just wish them well, but stop the cycle and get off that ferris wheel. Don’t you think? xoxoxo

  • Hi Matthew,

    Just watched your video about the one thing I can do to change my close relationships. Right now I do feel stuck in a rut. I have two close friends. One I have known for 7 years and the other 10 years. I moved from my hometown back in March and things have not been the same with either one of them. I call them just about every day. The calls almost always go unanswered and they don’t call back or text. They call me when it seems to be convenient for them, which varies from a 10 to 20 minute call one week and then same thing a few weeks later. They both say they are too busy. Ironically they have time to snapchat and Facebook and go out with people. I recently deleted Facebook in the hopes that they would reach out more often since they have no way of knowing anything unless they do. So far, it has not worked out well. I wanted to visit my hometown but now I’m not sure what the point would be. I feel like if they are “too busy” all the time, that I should take a hint and move on, forget about them and focus on making more friends where I live now. Do you have any words of wisdom?

  • The more I hear u the more u r admired as an individual. And yes u give insight to use words to express exactly what my values are and which can be really challenge if not guided properly.

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