“Why me?” “What is wrong with me?” “Why is this happening?”
When things don’t go our way, it’s easy to go into “victim mode” and ask ourselves the kind of questions that send us into a negative downward spiral. But there are 2 questions you can ask yourself that will put you on a positive path to overcome your bad circumstances and turn everything around.
I tell you what those questions are in this In this week’s LOVELife
3 Replies to “Smash That Victim Mentality in 2 Steps”
What a coincidence seeing this video today. I recently had a difficult situation too and afterwards I wrote down what happened and what I can do to prevent it from happening again. My question was “What can I do better next time?” I’ve been getting into the habit of asking myself these questions as I write and I find that it really supports my progress as person. Great video, Matt. Glad you were able to find a space that was even better. :)
Turn the negative into a positive. If you record information on situations like this that happen at work it could be useful in future job interviews because its not the ‘failing’ that counts; its how you overcome it/dealt with it/handle it and learnt from it.
I like your message, but I couldn’t help but notice something once again:
Matt you’re missing the extent to which microaggressions and discrimination really do exist and affect the outcomes of peoples efforts to get ahead in this world.
There have been other times where there’s been a sense of ignorance and over-simplification from your advice; it gives a bad look: that you’re limited by your own personal learned experience as a young, cute, able, english accent & native english speaking, white, straight male. I’m not claiming that’s the case, it’s just a suspicious look/impreession to give.
In order to be taken seriously and be effective as a human dynamics coach you need to display more learnedness about these issues affecting our lives everyday.
I wanna stress that I don’t disagree with (todays video) the importance of looking at what one can do instead of what’s wrong with the world, but these stories you tell of your own success following your own advice sometimes oose of you receiving male/white (etc) priviledge – or certainly not being limited like other groups do. The title of your video is in any case of discrimination/microaggression making the case that said individual is playing the victim, in stead of actually being one.
Please consider this point, I like your blog I’ve followed you since 2011 but I feel overlooked and disconnected from you when you STILL haven’t touched upon this topic in all that time and go on and give everyone the label of playing the victim. You loose credibility. This critique is a general one, not just relating to todays video…
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